First thing when i wake up is think about CANCER

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Phillsgirl
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2007
Total Posts : 28
   Posted 10/28/2007 6:54 AM (GMT -7)   
I don't know if this is normal, but I can't stop thinking that I have cancer. I had a lumpectomy 2 1/2 weeks ago and the doc says right now the cancer is out but I am soo afraid it is somewhere else. I'm afraid to think it is gone so as to not be disappointed if it isn't. I still have all the treatments to do and that scares the hell out of me. I try to joke about being bald and drawing on my eyebrows but, inside it is killing me. I know that sounds vane but I don't go to the corner store without makeup and now I am facing no hair, eyebrows, or eyelashes. I know I am glad that there are good treatments to make me survive and I guess this is showing me what is really important in life, but I am still so scared. Family and friends just don't get it. I'm so glad I can sound off when I feel this way. Just being able to share with others who know makes such a difference.

postal2
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2003
Total Posts : 1106
   Posted 10/28/2007 11:59 AM (GMT -7)   
Oh, I remember the "all I think about is cancer" days. It is very hard not to. Also, I know what you mean about family and friends don't get it. I guess until you've been in our shoes, it is pretty impossible to understand, to REALLY UNDERSTAND. Hang in there, and yes, you are going to find what is really important in life. Cancer changed me in many ways. My spirituality has grown immensly! And, yes, my family and friends still don't get it, but the ladies here do, and we are here for you too! I am sending you {{{{{hugs}}}}}.
Gail
  It's only when we truly know and understand that we have a limited time on earth -- and that we have no way of knowing when our time is up, we will then begin to live each day to the fullest, as if it was the only one we had.
 
Elisabeth Kubler Ross


Phillsgirl
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2007
Total Posts : 28
   Posted 10/29/2007 5:36 AM (GMT -7)   
Thanks so much. Sometimes a hug is all I need. :-)

Kattbird
Regular Member


Date Joined Jun 2005
Total Posts : 243
   Posted 10/29/2007 6:09 AM (GMT -7)   
I was the same way. And the closer it got for me to do chemo, it got worse. I guess it's natural. The fear of the unknown. I had issues real bad about losing my hair. I still don't have my eyebrows back and I think it's because of the Tamoxifen. Lots of hugs to you and hang in there.

Phillsgirl
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2007
Total Posts : 28
   Posted 11/16/2007 4:03 PM (GMT -7)   
Thanks, sorry it so much time for me to reply but you know how it is doctors doctors doctors so busy trying to get ready. yuk chemo starts on nov 26, thanksgiving meal is sure gonna taste good this year. lol but its all worth it. I'll write back soon. carol from rochester, ny
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