I finally finished the paperwork for SSDI and I am so glad!!! It has been so draining on every level filling it all out. I can't believe I actually got through it all. I know it is just the beginning of a long process, but at least this stage is done. Now I am just going to snuggle into bed and watch a movie. We are having a really beautiful snowstorm, so it is nice to be cozied up at home without this weight hanging over me. It is very mentally and emotionally taxing filling out these forms. The first one is called a function report, which is 8 pages long and goes through everything you are or are not able to do that relates to self-care, working and functioning in the outer world on a day to day basis. The old compensation tools and denial don't come into play here. You have to face up to all the capacities adn dreams you have lost and that is hard. It also made me realize how much I have come to depend on others in ways that I was no longer aware of, and that was very painful as well. Well, now for the rest of the day I am just going to think about how very grateful I am for Netflix and the leftovers in the fridge. Kids are with their dad this week, so another bonus (but don't tell them I said that! lol) Just wanted to share my big sigh of relief.
co-moderator CFS forum
"We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are."
- Anais Nin