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TDoern
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 495
   Posted 5/25/2008 10:55 AM (GMT -7)   
My husband has brought up an issue to me, that I sort of want opinions on, because our point of view on it vary quite a bit.

I use an epilator for removing hair on my legs and underarms and such. It's sort of like an electric razor - except it has a whole bunch of mini-tweezers on it that pretty much yank the hair out rather than just cutting off the top. The epilator has made keeping my legs smooth soooo much easier. I can spend 3-4 days using it in a row to get all the hair gone so my back doesn't suffer all at once. I can use it sitting down - in any room of the house as well. With the epilator I don't have to worry about trying to get one leg up to shave it and having the other leg give out, and the whole other mess of things that have and will happen again if I choose to shave and not epilate. My legs also stay smoother longer - meaning less time killing my back shaving.

So using the epilator isn't the problem. That was just a "this is what an epilator is".

The problem is that if the hair is long enough to use the epilator - and I'm having a really bad day pain wise, I will actually grab the epilator to use because it's so painful. It's painful enough that while I'm using it the pain distracts me from my back pain enough to actually almost be relieving. When your having hairs pulled out strand by strand it's not exactly a massage - and my mind tends to focus towards that pain rather than the back pain.

My husband thinks that this is a dangerous behavior. He says it reminds him of kids "cutting" themselves. I don't see it as anything dangerous - but he's worried it might lead me to more dangerous behaviors.

What do you guys think? Does anyone else do anything even remotely close?

Thanks,
Tammy
"When we come to the edge of the light we know, and are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown, of one thing we can be sure; either God will provide something solid to stand on... or we will be taught to fly.'"

"Cause when push comes to shove You taste what you're made of, You might bend, till you break Cause its all you can take; On your knees you look up Decide you've had enough, You get mad you get strong Wipe your hands shake it off, Then you Stand" From "Stand" by Rascal Flatts
_____________________________________________________________________________
Dx.: Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, Ulcerlative Colitis, Chronic Inflammation of the Colon, Ruptured & Fused L4-L5-S1 w/pinched nerves, Degenerative Disc Disease, Chronic Costochondritis, Back Muscle Spasms, Asthma, Benign Tremmors (hands)


PAlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 5/25/2008 11:46 AM (GMT -7)   
Tammy,
Pain in one area that's stronger certainly can be distracting, and there are actually some pain mangement techniques that use that as one way to manage pain. People that "cut" are generally trying to relieve psychological pain and anxiety rather than physical. And what you're doing with the epilator isn't dangerous or self-destructive, as the cutting is (although the cutting isn't usually for suicidal intent, it's still self-destructive). I don't see a problem with what you're doing unless it's done so frequently that it becomes some kind of addictive pattern and you end up doing yourself some harm, or unless you escalate to some other behavior that is danger/self-destructive. Or if you in some way started to use the epilator in ways it's not designed for just to create pain.

Does this make sense?

PaLady

sjkly
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2007
Total Posts : 2113
   Posted 5/25/2008 1:49 PM (GMT -7)   
I agree completely with PAlady.
Sj

Chutz
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 9090
   Posted 5/25/2008 2:13 PM (GMT -7)   
I also agree...cutting is in no way the same as what you are doing. Distracting your mind from back pain by using this device seems similar to child birth techniques. Focus somewhere else. Like said above, cutting is destructive. It's most often triggered by stress and anxiety and for some it's a sense of control that they've never felt. It also makes some feel 'alive' as most of the time they feel emotionally 'numb'. I can't see that this relates to you at all.

Hugs,
Chutzie
Co-Mod Fibromyalgia & Chronic Pain Forums
~~~
Fibromyalgia, Ulcerative Colitis, Insulin dependent diabetic, collapsed disk, dermatitis herpetiformus, osteo arthritis in spine and other locations.
***************

The only difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has it's limits. Albert Einstein: (1879-1955)


Muzz
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 395
   Posted 5/25/2008 3:26 PM (GMT -7)   
I think that it's also similiar to the action of a TENS unit, it's sends your body the message to go hurt somewhere else for awhile.

If pain could have cured us
we should long ago have been saved.


Boxerlover
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2006
Total Posts : 274
   Posted 5/25/2008 7:26 PM (GMT -7)   

I agree with everyone else, sounds OK to me.  Now if you start start slamming on your hand like House did (the chronic pain doc on Fox named HOUSE) nono  we might have take away your epilator :-)

Melissa


Toritoo
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 184
   Posted 5/25/2008 10:32 PM (GMT -7)   

   confused Hi Tammy,

  My first thought when I read your letter was OMG they still make those things! I got one has a gift that I asked for years ago and I tried it and lasted about 10 minutes. It was obviously a torture devise~right? I understand your need to escape the pain, I have felt that pain  everyday for the last 13 years and I would do almost anything to not feel this way for one day one minute even but not by having another pain replace it. Right now I am having wicked bad belly issues and it has caused my back pain to diminish into the grey areas of day to day life yet my quality of life has not changed. Pain is pain.

I guess I am kinda taking your husbands side in a small way. If you were my wife I'd be worried and that is alright, normal. While in childbirth we don't escape the pain of giving birth by hurting our selves but quite the opposite by thinking of things that are peaceful, calm, serene. So while I don't understand your super human pain control over the Epilator I wish you could find a better way to acheive the same results.

Just to be clear I agree that your husband has reason to worry. I agree that you must do what you must do and as long as it does't get worse your husband should respect your feelings and be supportive. Phew....

Good luck Tammy                              Toritoo  eyes


JoBobB
New Member


Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 14
   Posted 5/26/2008 12:53 AM (GMT -7)   
when i can stand pain anymore, i put a back massager hard on my ankle bone and leave it there until my legs go numb from vibraitng. i dont think the epilator is much different approach from that.

i have a "tweezie" that yanks the hairs instead of cutting them off. i never used it for pain but i do no my legs get a little numby after i use it so i can see why u do it. maybe i should try it lol one thing i think makes it more ok than "cutting" is that u cant do it all the time every day because the hairs dont grow fast enough so i dont think ur gonna get addicted to epilatoring and plus ur gonna do it anyway even if the pain wasnt there cause the hairs would be.

Lindaloo
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2006
Total Posts : 1713
   Posted 5/26/2008 8:24 AM (GMT -7)   
Tammy,

You are not in any danger of using to epilator in a destructive or addictive way. I agree that it is like using a TENS or childbirth techniques to distract from the pain. It is certainly not like cutting. That is psychological and your back pain is physical. If is gives you pain free moments in your back, so be it. You just got lucky that's all. If I could find relief from my chronic pain, I would too.

Love,

Lindaloo
Believe in yourself.  Be kind to your fellow humans and animals.  Take time to smell the flowers and the coffee. 
 
And by all means, when you are down, ask me for help.  I will be there.
 
Linda C.


solar powered
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 538
   Posted 5/26/2008 1:02 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Tammy. Your epilator does sound like a torture device but I completely understand your desire to quiet your pain at least for a little while. When my biceps are hurting very badly, I have this almost overwhelming urge to stab it with a fork (I never have). Actually that's one way that I measure what kind of pain day I'm having ie wanting to pull the fork out of the drawer or not. I know that sounds crazy and I have said that to people and they look at me like I'm a crazy person (which could be true also) until they hurt themselves and then all of a sudden they understand. If your device helps the pain without hurting you more, I'd say go for it. Makes more sense then stabbing the painful part with a fork! :) Lisa

Muzz
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 395
   Posted 5/26/2008 5:37 PM (GMT -7)   
Toritoo, during childbirth, I sure didn't think  about anything calm and serene, I gripped the siderail for all it was worth! LOL
I used an epilator for yrs and loved it, used it til nature took over and post-menopausal took over and left me w/very little leg hair to worry about. Bet the men in this thread love hearing about that kind of lady stuff! LOLOLOL

If pain could have cured us
we should long ago have been saved.


Toritoo
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 184
   Posted 5/26/2008 8:07 PM (GMT -7)   
yeah  Hey Muzz,
of course your right but if you think about it before going in to labor we were taught through Lamaz the peace calm thing. Problem there was that they did'nt say it would'nt work. lol. I think Tammy is ok and lucky  to have someone to worry about her, when so many don't. As long as they understand each other and Tammys' husband is supportive and understanding of her final feelings and she does'nt escalate to something worse, well it's all good. Night everyone.
 
Toritoo 
 
ps I bet a man invented that epilady/epilator thing.
pss Sorry guys.

TDoern
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 495
   Posted 5/27/2008 11:17 AM (GMT -7)   
Thanks everyone for the reply's.

I do understand it can be a bad behavior if it escalates, I just wanted to see if anyone thought as it is if it's a bad thing. It's good to know I'm not the only one who hopes to escape the bad pain. One of the things I'm going to be talking to my doctor about on Friday is the fact that since starting this new long acting pain medication my pain levels in general have gone down - but when the pain gets really bad the percocet isn't touching it anymore.

anyways - thanks again everyone!
"When we come to the edge of the light we know, and are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown, of one thing we can be sure; either God will provide something solid to stand on... or we will be taught to fly.'"

"Cause when push comes to shove You taste what you're made of, You might bend, till you break Cause its all you can take; On your knees you look up Decide you've had enough, You get mad you get strong Wipe your hands shake it off, Then you Stand" From "Stand" by Rascal Flatts
_____________________________________________________________________________
Dx.: Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, Ulcerlative Colitis, Chronic Inflammation of the Colon, Ruptured & Fused L4-L5-S1 w/pinched nerves, Degenerative Disc Disease, Chronic Costochondritis, Back Muscle Spasms, Asthma, Benign Tremmors (hands)

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