Applied for a Job - a foolish choice?

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PAlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 10/1/2008 7:51 PM (GMT -7)   
Dear HW Famiy,
i'm shaking my head at myself. shakehead Today I put together and mailed an application package for a job that really interested me. I'd have to relocate (moving - an issue all unto itself even if one is healthy). And it's full tiime. And I'm 58. With chronic pain, back problems, taking what seems like handfuls of medications each day. Am I in total denial?

I have this ongoing tennis match in my head. To work or not to work, that is the question. Since being laid off last year from my part time position (laid off while I was out on leave from back surgery) I've only been able to work a couple of hours a week in my small business. I really should close it down, but it's the only connection with the outside world I've got left. It barely pay for itself. But the thought of being faced with both pain and poverty for the rest of my life is almost too much to bear. I know some of you understand this, and some have even been posting recently about your struggles with working. Some of those posts hit home because work isn't only a pay check and benefits (not that those aren't important, they are crucial!), but it's a lot of who I am. I don't have children, am not married, and would love to be able to go back to work again for a few more years.

Please - I'm not looking for anyone to problem solve about the type of work or job I do or could find, just maybe some support for this internal struggle I think many of us have at one point or another about figuring out when we've hit our limit and can do no more. I guess for me because I got laid off last year, I never had the chance to find out. The ideal for me (although not the ideal financially - I live alone and have no other source of income) the ideal would be a part time job with benefits, but those are few and very, very far between. Most employers any more call 30 hours "part time' just so they can get out of paying benefits. But this position was the first thing in a long time to excite me. Yet to even write the cover letter took me several days. I have a waive of energy, and then a waive of tiredness.

I don't even know what I'm looking for here. Maybe just somewhere to vent. Maybe I should post this under the "what makes you cry" thread because thinking of poverty and pain, having no future, just being isolated, no choices....those things make me cry.

Does anyone understand all this? smhair

PaLady

TDoern
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 495
   Posted 10/1/2008 8:34 PM (GMT -7)   
*hugs*

The hardest thing I've faced since I injured my back in 2000 was when I ended up quitting my last job. It took me two months to realize I was going to need to quit, and many many tears. Then since I was hoping that quitting would give me the time to relax and get back together, when I finally realized I wouldn't be able to work again, I cried for weeks.

I was a photographer, at places like Sears and Olan Mills. I loved what I did, and I was good at it. It was a job I looked forward to getting up to go do, and a job I could feel good about. I was taking pictures that would be around for generations.

I've thought about going back, trying to bite the pain to do it. Yet at the same time I know the pain that it caused me physically, and the pain it caused my husband to watch me go through. When I sit down and look at things I know that I can't work anymore, but it doesn't stop me from wanting to be able to do so.

I think you should follow your heart. You are the only one that knows what you can do. If nothing else, you may be able to look into a volunteer position somewhere that would be as lax as you need with your pain. Right now I can't even know I'll make it to church every week, but if I could I know I would volunteer somewhere.

Sorry I don't have any better things to say.
Hugs
"When we come to the edge of the light we know, and are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown, of one thing we can be sure; either God will provide something solid to stand on... or we will be taught to fly.'"

Dx: Degenerative Disc Disease, Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, IBS-d, Ruptured & Fused L4-L5-S1, Bulging/Ruptured L3-L4, Sciatica, Neuropathy, Costochondritis, Reflux, Gastric Bypass Surgery 12/6/07
Rx: Kadian 50mg - every 12 hours, Percocet 5/325 - up to 4 daily, Baclofen 10mg - 3 daily, Amitriptylene 200mg - at bedtime, Prevacid Solutabs - 1 daily, various vitamins.


ryand
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2007
Total Posts : 639
   Posted 10/1/2008 8:44 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi, dear friend. I've been having a rough time these past few weeks and haven't had it in me to post much. I know you've been right there too, and I've been thinking of you. I do try to read the posts periodically, though and look for notes from those of you I've come to know.

I do know right where you are at with this and want to tell you that I will be praying for you about this. I know the struggle you are having in your mind about this decision. I am working right now, which you know, but as you also know it is ALL I am able to do. As is evidenced by my absence from this board over the past few weeks, although I am able to maintain my job it is taking every last bit of effort and stamina I possess to do so. And I have that very same struggle you are talking about... I have no life anymore. I go to work and push through trying desperately not to let the grimaces of pain show and praying that I won't cry while people are watching and then I drag myself home and collapse. I cannot sleep b/c I cannot find a position that does not hurt. But do I want to give up the job? Well, without it I would not have insurance, a home, groceries, a car, fuel, or - perhaps most importantly, an identity! No, as long as I CAN work, I MUST work. I just MUST. It nearly kills me. Some days I wish I would just die b/c it hurts so much, but still I cannot give it up so long as I can drag myself through the door.

I'm there with you friend. I wish I had some sage advice or great pearls of wisdom to share with you. What I do have, though, is all the support and friendship and love I can possibly send your way, and as many prayers and virtual hugs as you could ever want. I am not very talkative right now, I'm sorry... But I'm still here and I'm thinking of you.

Ry

Pamela Neckpain
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2008
Total Posts : 1821
   Posted 10/2/2008 10:34 AM (GMT -7)   
PaL,
This is not a good time for our sick planet and its inhabitants.
My husband is ill. He's all I have.
I've been living the life of an invalid for 6 1/2 years.
Haven't cooked one meal. (Standing hurts too much)
We are in a position of losing everything in the stock markets.
(Is that too political?)
We have made financial errors galore.
We really have no family.
Without him, I don't know how I could possibly go on.
So ... In a way, I'm with ya girl.
We're just too darn close to living on the streets.
Pamela
Could you tutor? That would bring in something.
I wish you well.

ladyred
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 191
   Posted 10/2/2008 3:30 PM (GMT -7)   

Dear Palady,

Hugs to you, I'm sorry to hear that you are struggling so much this last while.  I wanted to interject something here.

One of the things that drives must of us so crazy is the what ifs in life.  What if I cant work, what if I dont get better, what if I cant make it..exc..But at the end of the day they are just that uncertainies and without trying we will never know what it is we can and can not do.  And sometimes a leap of faith is all we need to make our lives a bit better.

I know this is such a struggle for most of us and I by no means judge you on any decission you make with anything because you are the only one who will know what you can do and what you cant do.  I know for myself it is a struggle and I work maybe 25 to 30 hrs a week, but I also have the added stress of kids and all that comes with that.  I think for me I would be able to handle working more without the kids because I would be able to come home and rest inbetween work and bed. 

I also think if I had to sit at home all day I would go nuts, Im in pain no matter what I do, so for me whats the difference might as well work and have the socialization and at the least the feeling like I am still somewhat capable.  But that is just me PAlady.  You have to do what is right for you as you are the one who has to live with the consequences good or bad and only you know what you are capable of doing or how much you can tolerate.

I really wish you luck with this PAlady, Sometimes its not easy to make such life changing decissions when your healty let alone with all that we have to deal with.  I just want you to know I am very proud of you through for putting yourself out there and at least trying it shows that you are still fighting, ( and no offence to any that have had to quit and stay home because of there CP we are all in different places phyicaly).  and how knows a cure might be right around the corner. 

You take care Palady and I really wish you peace with this decission what ever it is and just know that we are all here to support and love you no matter what that decission might be.

Take care

Lara


PAlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 10/2/2008 4:19 PM (GMT -7)   
Dear Friends,
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.

It helps so much just knowing there are people to "talk" to who understand the struggle. And whose feedback is at least reasonable BECAUSE you all understand. Does that make sense? LOL I guess what I mean is that we get so much "advice" from well-intentioned people, many of whom can't quite get what this feels like from this inside out. But you all do.

Hugs around,
PaLady

Pamela - financial errors galore? Put me in that pile, too!

An Dear Ry - I hope your flare ends soon. And I truly get the "MUST" work.

Thank you to EVERYONE!

Chutz
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 9090
   Posted 10/2/2008 10:50 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Pa...and I wish I had a miracle answer for you. Have you considered talking to work counselors? Like at a community college...retraining??? I wouldn't be surprised if you could get it paid for and help getting placed for what you need and want. Also, call the Red Cross in your area. You don't have to be hit by a tornado to get free help.

When I was first single I had no money, little college education, hubby took the business and blew it all on his chickie in a red sports car...hence no child support or maintenance while he vacationed. If it wasn't for family I would have been on the streets with 2 teen sons and a pregnant teen daughter. Long story short, I did finish college and taught for 13 years part time until just a couple of months ago when the body gave out. I married my best friend who also helped me get thru the divorce, sell the farm and learn to like myself again.

There is a lot of help out there Pa...keep knocking on doors until the right person answers.

Love you!
Chutzie
Co-Mod Fibromyalgia & Chronic Pain Forums
~~~
Fibromyalgia, Ulcerative Colitis, Insulin dependent diabetic, collapsed disk, dermatitis herpetiformus, osteo arthritis in spine and other locations.
***************

The only difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has it's limits. Albert Einstein: (1879-1955)


crps
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2006
Total Posts : 174
   Posted 10/2/2008 11:13 PM (GMT -7)   

shocked  ello H.w.

Allong with the agony of Cronic Pain is the confusion,forgfetfulness,inability to finish little progects,(in the time you said).Also for me, anyway what is so important to me one week may not have the same importance the next week. I dont know why. I have ten thousandthoughts and ideas flying around, but then I think.............I'm not normal.   I have a problem........

Then I think, how can I acomplish my goals in my temporary body and mind.........depresion settles in and then sometims spitefullness.............. mad

   After I manage to settle down and relax I go to P.T.   And there are people who have a positive outlook at life. They smile,laugh,tell jokes and are on the completely opposite side of the glass where looking through! shocked

I smile back, dont talk too much and start my procedures. Eventually they have you talking because there are several people there all moaning,yelling and laughing at themselves trying to get better by doing all those crazy P.T. cure-alls! As each week passes we notice that all my movements and weights are getting better than the previous week. Well to make it shorter, by the time I get home, I feel a sence of accomplishment I did not feel 3 hours earlier.
 
This story really doesnt mean a thing! Its just me going through all those brutal thoughts that can kill onesself, to a different light that maybe with some good luck, I will see alot more and start to think of me as normal without a problem...............................................Mike

worsenow!!!
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 208
   Posted 10/3/2008 5:52 AM (GMT -7)   
palady im thinking of you.i think you should go for it, that way you will know if you can or cant. And there will be no regrets with the what ifs!!!! out of being nosy what sort of job did you apply for???  And you know what you may be 58 but so what!!!!! if you want to then nothing should matter or stand in your way. Im sure everyone here will be behind you no matter what. You never know you may find a lovely gent to whisk you off your feet, seeing as you will be out there new town etc......
 
here is something that may cheer you up after 28 years of pain agony frustration tears screams moaning sleepless nights, and a year post op i am feeling great, that great i am carrying my fifth and final child and my husband and i couldnt be happier. You see there is always hope and light at the end of the tunnel, i could never see that light but i do now. Just know Palady that there is hope and faith and you can get through whatever you put your mind too. You never know it could be that it may take a few months for a new routine  etc... but it may help. Happy endorphins going through your body could help ease your pain.
 
I am with you all the way no matter your decision,
 
your friend
amanda xxx
extreme constipation from birth
fainting spells aged 15, then diagnosed I.B.S
anal fissures, haemorrhoids internal and external
mucous and bleeding
sigmoidoscopies, endoscpies, scans, x-rays, bloods
h-pylori aged 24-26
more tests, diagnosed severe slow transit, marker tests took 3-4 weeks to come away
large colon removed in 2007, aged 27( surgeon said removed 10ft) no colostomy
still in severe pain, awaiting dietician appt, now lots of food intoleraces
 so much better. now concentraing of food intolerances, odd bad day
meds- ibuprofen, fluoxetine, amitriptyline,and omeprazole 
now med free!!!
 
LOCATION- North east of scotland


PAlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 10/3/2008 11:40 AM (GMT -7)   
Amanda,
Thank you so much for your thoughtful reply. Actually, I wouldn't bat an eye at my age IF I had my health. It's all about that - living with the pain and the effects of the meds. The position isi at a college which I would love, but I have to honeslty say I question whether I can get up everyday and work a full day for a full week. Some members here (like Ry) who are doing it are barely making it physically. I think you hit the nail on the head thought when you said I need to answer the "what ifs". Maybe this is the process I need to go through. The last time I went for a job interview was a couple of years ago and I was in pain and had taken my meds and I knew I wasn't thinking clearly in the interview, and of course I never got called back. If that happens again, maybe then I will know. One step at a time in the process, right? And if this doesn't work out, and I recognize that full time isn't going to be a realistic possibility, then I have to do what many of you have and go fo SSD.

I am praying Congress extends unemployment benefits for another several weeks (the House is voting on it right now - but I won't get political here) so that I can have continued help getting me through this. My unemployment ends in a couple of weeks and then I'll have nothing coming in. And will of course have to apply for some welfare assistance but that doesn't happen quickly either.

I appreciate all the support I have here because I may need a lot of shoulders to cry on if I really have to accept what all the probabilities lean toward. And one other thing about age, in conjunction with living alone, is that one's energy isn't the same even if you're healthy, so it does matter. And realistically, employers can find younger workers who are experienced and can stay around a long time. But I applied. And maybe I won't even get called for an interview and that will be that.

Sigh...

PaLady

worsenow!!!
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 208
   Posted 10/4/2008 2:52 AM (GMT -7)   

hiya Palady. Things in the US must be quite different as they are here. Here there is a government initiative which employers have to employ the disabled and people of a more mature age!!! Its all an equal opportunities thng. So even if someone had your health problems they should still get the job if they have the best qualifications for it. I hope i didnt offend you. If i did i am so sorry, but here age etc... should not be taken into account. Here you would probably actually have more of a chance. Things in the US sound so scary, here you would quickly get disability etc... which i hear is not too bad.( you also get a good car to help you get about) Just a pity you cant emigrate to the uk. Free health care and your age etc... would probably mean free meds also. Then a council house with cheaper rates. Right now i thank my lucky stars at being here, as i could not have afforded my op, meds or constant doc appts. I have full faith that you can do well in this job. Maybe for the interview you could take half your meds, just to take the edge off the pain but where you still have your wits about you!!! hav you ever thought of doing a telephone counselling job??? that would maybe be not as physically demanding, and i am sure that your constant advice giving here would stand you in good stead, i have considered such a job but i keep expanding my family so there iis no point me even trying. But hey at least you will know one way or the other if you are able to.

I do understand age can be an issue i sometimes already feel like that, with the kids and everything, but you have got this far and i have faith in you as many others will

always thinking of my HW friends

amanda xxx


extreme constipation from birth
fainting spells aged 15, then diagnosed I.B.S
anal fissures, haemorrhoids internal and external
mucous and bleeding
sigmoidoscopies, endoscpies, scans, x-rays, bloods
h-pylori aged 24-26
more tests, diagnosed severe slow transit, marker tests took 3-4 weeks to come away
large colon removed in 2007, aged 27( surgeon said removed 10ft) no colostomy
still in severe pain, awaiting dietician appt, now lots of food intoleraces
 so much better. now concentraing of food intolerances, odd bad day
meds- ibuprofen, fluoxetine, amitriptyline,and omeprazole 
now med free!!!
 
LOCATION- North east of scotland


PAlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 10/4/2008 10:30 AM (GMT -7)   
Amanda,
I appreciate the intent, but age in itself is not the issue. Chronic pain is. And the treatment. What's the difference if I take half the meds for an interview if I can't do the job full time? I'd still have to be on meds.

I think I really was just looking for more emotional support as I process all this than specific suggestions about jobs and such. That actually makes it even more frustrating. Kinda feels a bit like the same thing of having to explain myself to family and others who don't understand. Not sure how much chronic pain you struggle with. And I see you're med free and most of us with chronic pain aren't so fortunate.,

PaLady

Baybreeze
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2005
Total Posts : 315
   Posted 10/4/2008 2:31 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi,
 
I know just how hard that decision making struggle is for you. I lost my job in January (my company went bankrupt). After 3 months of of sending out resumes, I got no calls, not even for an interview. It was extremely discouraging. When I was working, though, my bosses were extremely understanding and empathetic regarding my physical problems. I did have a sit down job but it still became very hard. And Iknow exactly what you mean when you say your work is ALL you can do..and no energy for anything else. I went to work in extreme pain every day and got through it somehow (I don't know how, though) because I'm also single and need to support myself. I would never get enough from Social Security, so that was never an option for me. But my employer, I think, was rare in working with me and understanding my limitations and constant doctor appointments, etc. One of my bosses had even made me call my Rheum one time ( i was crying from the pain), they told me to come in that day..and my boss was concerned if I could even drive, so she drove me to the doctor and waited for me. And even so, I still did a good job at work. I still gave it all my all. And llike you said, it became so exhausting (not to mention that many times I could not go out anywhere anyway b/c I couldn't reallly walk around)..so exhausting that I came home and usually fell asleep. I hardly ate because my appetite was lost from the pain. My bosses and even co-workers always asked if I needed help and some made me let them help me. I am very stubborn and I felt like I shouldnt be needing help, so I always tried to do whatever task it was. So my co-workers and dept. bosses were absolutely wonderful about it all. However,  I know that is very hard to find.
 
Well, I went on unemployment and had some bad pain. The UE counselor kept asking what was wrong with my leg (as I limp). I do have severe ankle arthritis but my back was causing me the most grief. First I did not want to tell him that I was very limited in what I could do....because on UE, one is supposed to be physically able. But even that counselor was great...he actually brought me up to DVR (The Division of Vocational Rehabilitation) to see if they could help me. Every state has this division and I think they are more known for helping people on worker's comp. that got injured on teh job, but that is not all they are there for. This division exists to help anyone with a disability that might affect their employment. Anyone with a disability can just walk in off the street to request an appointment. One can have Carpal Tunnel and go to DVR on their own for job assistance. You do have to let them know what your medical conditions are and provide proof (IE: copies of your medical records, which you can get on your own or they can contact your doctors for them). The first thing my counselor asked me was if I wanted to update my skills or learn new skills, which I was interested in. So I received a state grant for job training at a vocational school that I pay nothing for. It's a free education and I also still get my unemployment. They work with you and employers to coordinate any special needs you might have to enable you to do your job. Like with me, I might need a special chair or more breaks, or who knows what else and DVR can help arrange that with an employer. They also have job leads, job counseling, resume help, and all sorts of things. And their requirements are way less than SSI. So you really should think of calling your county's Division of Vocational Rehabilitation to look into it.
 
I am personally still soooo worried about finding a job in my condition. I am in pain management and on several meds to control my pains quite a bit, though I do still get some pain. And what's worse is just this past Thursday, I had a sudden breakthrough flare of severe pain, which is causing me to hardly be able to walk. And wouldn't you know, that after this happened, I got a call from a job I applied for to set up an interview next week! And I also have an agency to see next week for skills and assessment testing. This was a fine time for me to get such a pain exaserbation! I called my PM Thursday to at least request a Medrol pack in hopes itmight calm down my nerve pains and maybe I can look semi-normal walking. There is no way I can go to an interview shuffling and hobbling in there with my cane the way I have to walk. We all know there would be no chance for my of getting that job. So I am suffering for the weekend and think I will start my Medrol either Monday or Tuesday so that the highest doses are taken when I go for my interview.
 
It is so not an option for me not to work. I am only 39 right now (though my spine problems started around age 33 & I've already had spine surgery) and sometimes I just think of the future and like..how am I going to live? Where will I live? I have no children either, so no one else that could help me. It can get very depressing, so I totally understand where you are coming from. But I so try to put that out of my mind.
 
If you work with DVR, they might have suggestions for you for things tthat might make working a bit easier on you. It's at least one other option to look into.
 
And I worry so much about if I will get hired. I am not always in extreme pain, but there is always some pain present. I walk with a limp and usually leaned a bit forward and to the right so it is obvious to others that something is wrong. But I will keep a positive attitude at any interviews and really try my hardest to express what a hard, dedicated worker I am. But still, if I do get hired, then have another bout of severe pain where I can hardly walk and I'm a new hire...what will they think???
 
I cannot stand for much length of time so any job on my feet is out of the question. I can only do a sit-down job, although, as you know, that hurts too. The best advice I can give you at this moment is to contact DVR and meet with a counselor to discuss your situation and work concerns.

skeye
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 2976
   Posted 10/4/2008 4:33 PM (GMT -7)   
PAlady,

I wish you luck with the job application. I can understand your anxiety about working, as I'm in a similar situation with school, in terms of not knowing whether you'll be able to do it due to your medical problems. Hopefully the people at this job will be at least partially understanding of your situation. I think we all feel isolated because of our conditions, so any connections we have with other people are highly valued, and like you mentioned, work is great way to connect with the outside world, especially if you don't have a family to fall back on. I give you a lot of credit for keeping your business going despite your situation. The job application is worth a try at least, because if you find you can handle working, and working is something that you enjoy, then it will bring that much more happiness into your life, and we could all use a little happiness.

Skeye

worsenow!!!
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 208
   Posted 10/4/2008 4:37 PM (GMT -7)   

well palady, after 28 and a half years of chronic pain i think i qualify!!! things have been horrific since being born, and nothing on this earth worked. No meds, no ops, not even new age fandangled things. Yeh i had kids throughout my awful pain, but i had to if i wanted a family. Constantly off school growing up, fainting through pain in front of friends, most of my life couldnt walk or stand straight!!! i now have a lumber arch, which my consultant told me about. Finally after a miserable life of not being able to do the things i should have been doing i can. It has been a long road. A long road that my kids know why mummy is lying down. A life where i couldnt be a proper wife or proper friend. I have been off my meds for 2 months, i had my last op june laast year. A combo of things finally helped, and i am not ashamed to say i am finally well. But i still think that it does not make any less an appropriate person to be on the chronic pain site. Considering i have only been well 2 months, pain is all i know.

Throughout this site stories are always heartbreaking, everytime i read somethng new i want to reach out and hug that person and tell them that things can get better. Once upon a time i was told by docs i had this for life!!!! well i dont, and i am happy. Sharing good things and bad things is the whole point of this site. I know from coming here, i had my hopes raised and it worked. Every one needs hope in their life. I also only mentioned the age issue, because you mentioned it yourself in your post, bu i am also not the only one to suggest things to you. i had absoloutly no intention of upsetting you, but please do not make light of the problems i have suffered since birth just because i am finally free of it, but i also have no idea if it will last, i am enjoying life while i can, so please do not make me feel guilty about it

always thinking of you amanda x


extreme constipation from birth
fainting spells aged 15, then diagnosed I.B.S
anal fissures, haemorrhoids internal and external
mucous and bleeding
sigmoidoscopies, endoscpies, scans, x-rays, bloods
h-pylori aged 24-26
more tests, diagnosed severe slow transit, marker tests took 3-4 weeks to come away
large colon removed in 2007, aged 27( surgeon said removed 10ft) no colostomy
still in severe pain, awaiting dietician appt, now lots of food intoleraces
 so much better. now concentraing of food intolerances, odd bad day
meds- ibuprofen, fluoxetine, amitriptyline,and omeprazole 
now med free!!!
 
LOCATION- North east of scotland


PAlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 10/4/2008 5:54 PM (GMT -7)   
Amanda,
No one's trying to make you feel guilty. I think we're just on very different pages, so to speak. Let's just leave it at that, ok? I also didn't know all your history. If you posted it somewhere and I didn't see it or forgot it, my apologies. I barely remember my own history sometimes!

Skeye and Baybreeze thanks so much for your input, Baybreeze I could have written parts of your post. Having one understanding employer is one thing; the luck of finding another in a tight job market? There are just so many variables for us, health being #1. I really related to not wanting to walk into an interview limping (yea, like we can control it all - although we sure try our best!).

I'm tired tonight. Went to a family gathering but could only last a couple of hours. So I'm going to watch some mindless tv after taking some meds. Be back later!

Thanks again everyone!
PaLady yeah

Post Edited (PAlady) : 10/4/2008 6:58:06 PM (GMT-6)


ryand
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2007
Total Posts : 639
   Posted 10/5/2008 11:24 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi, PaLady! I just wanted to pipe in quickly and remind you that I'm praying for you and sending many hugs your way. I hope it won't be too long before you hear back about an interview, and I really pray that this will be the job for you - with that "just right" employer and everything!

Your friend,
Ry

tydickens
New Member


Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 7
   Posted 10/6/2008 3:47 PM (GMT -7)   
Hello All,
I came across this site because I am looking for some help I guess. I have lived with pain from an injury I received in the military in 1994 with my back. I have suffered with constanct neck and back problems with severe pain and no one seems to know what is wrong with me. I have been on a number of meds in that time and there is none that I could take and work. I have been working on knee pain as well and they both have arthritis behind them and that alone I can't walk all that well. The left knee is down to the bone on bone and I need a knee replacement and I just think that at 35 would that be a good thing for me. I had a good job and very supportative owners and staff and after two years I had to leave because I could not do it any more the pain was just too much for me. I have been on the patch (Fentanyl) I was up to 75mcg and the patch would not stay on and the doc did not call me back so I was out and now I am off of the patch with no step down. I am in so much pain right now I am about to lose my mind and when I was on the med I could not think right I also was scared to drive because I always felt loopy so to speak. I have worked from age 16 and I don't know anything else so now I am a stay at home mom with two small girls 2 and 5 so you all know how hard it is to have (me) time. I pushed myself to the limit and I should not have but like someone said the world today don't let you take a break from the pain the bills still come. I have a husband that tries to understand but he has not lived with this like I have does he think that I make it up I hope not. I hope that no one will make up having severe pain because if you ever had it that would be something not to pretend about. I guess I wanted to know that there were other that could understand how I am feeling. What do I do for pain now I just sit here and cry because there is nothing else for me.
Thanks

PAlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 10/6/2008 4:20 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi, Tydickens,
i just wanted to welcome you to the HW forum. I don't have much time to respond at the moment, and am not feeling so hot myself, but I'd suggest that you cut and paste your post and start a new thread. That way you can introduce yourself to people and ask for the specific input you may need.

It sounds like at the very least you need to call your doctor back and get in for another appointment - or find a new doc. I know it's a challenge. Others may give you more advice if they see your post on a new thread. Title it so people may know what you're looking for.

Again, welcome.

PaLady

sarami
New Member


Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 10/7/2008 10:20 AM (GMT -7)   
I am new here too. I just wanted to say hello. I have had chronic back pain for the past five years. It has changed my life, not in a good way. I am glad to know that I'm not alone.

Sara

tydickens
New Member


Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 7
   Posted 10/7/2008 10:58 AM (GMT -7)   
Sarami,
It was not until I came here that I found that people really know how you feel so welcome we will be talking soon.
Tydickens
Tydickens
 


PAlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 10/7/2008 11:05 AM (GMT -7)   
Sara,
I'd also like to welcome you to the HW forum. I'd give the same suggestion to you as I did to Tydickens - start a new thread (topic) and introduce yourself, especially if you are looking for support or have some questions. We aren't doctors, but can share our experiences. And it is a great place for support.

PaLady

CaryF
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 505
   Posted 10/7/2008 1:54 PM (GMT -7)   
Dear PaL,

I strongly encourage you to go for it. You can't win if you aint in.
Anyone can sabotage themselves with what ifs. I say go for the job with all you've got, get it, try it on & see what comes. Only then will you know the answers to your what ifs.

I am in a similar position thus that I must work and am grateful for every dollar. I have good & bad days but am not complaining. I am not disabled (yet) & as long as I can contribute - I will. With the economy such - I hate to say I suspect it will be more & more difficult to qualify for disability. I believe I (we all) must look after myself as long as I'm able.

Good luck with your interview!

Best, Cary

PAlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 10/7/2008 3:22 PM (GMT -7)   
Cary,
Thanks for your encouragement. I don't have an interview yet! I just sent in the application, which was due by last Friday. And it can take time in academic settings for committees to review applications, so it may be a few weeks before I hear. I'm hoping I at least get called for an interview. Even that will tell me something - if I can make it without too much fidgeting, think clearly when responding, etc. You're right about answering the "what ifs". And the economy...well, I won't even go there! Too frightening!

Thanks! And I will definitely let my friends here know if I get called for an interview. I'll need cheerleaders!

PaLady

ryand
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2007
Total Posts : 639
   Posted 10/7/2008 4:33 PM (GMT -7)   
PaLady:

Keep that positive thinking! I know you can do it. yeah

Cheering LOUDLY!!!!! (Me & the Wilsons both!)

Ry
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