Post Edited (White Beard) : 5/10/2009 11:57:24 PM (GMT-6)
As usual, you have been given the best advice possible by all of our friends here on HW. It is very scary if we have to change PM Dr.s....I had to do that only once in the last 9 yrs. Don't give up because once you do find the right Dr., he will NOT make you feel like you do right now. Be very honest about what happened to you, most Dr's who treat CP, know that we aren't addicts....I was always afraid to give in and take more pain meds for that reason, my PM Dr. told me CP patients that stay on prescribed doses can never be addicts!
I have felt like you about my marriage, but found out that my husbands frustration was that he couldn't fix me. I took his silence and sometimes rude comments as being a burden to him.....over the last few years and especially since joining HW, we are communicating better and things are back to normal. Sometimes, I believe because of our pain and own inner turmoil, that our minds make things worse then they are. Talk to your husband and let him know how scared you are!
Hoping all works out for you!
This is for CSHELP, OMG, you have really been through the ringer and I really feel for you. When you health is declineing and you seem to get no-where I know exactly what you mean. I have not been well for 10 years and I am sick and tired of it and just want to live my life and have some enjoyment. I have been on chronic pain meds all that time from oxycotin, morphine pump, fentenal patches and vicodin , delodid. I have weened myself off of the fentenal as of last july and just now take the vicodin but I am down to 500mg 4xday. and that just takes the edge off. So I still am in constant pain.
I have not been able to have a job since 2003 because I can not stay well enough to keep a job and that stresses me out and makes my IBS extra bad, I have one of the worse cases of IBS that my doctor has ever seen.
Now back to you, the injections did help a bit for my back pain which is the source of my chronic pain. The morphine pump took care of the pain but could not handle it as it plugged me up constantly and I was constantly nausiated, so after 3 years of dealing with that I had it removed.
Someone just told me to try acupuncture for my back pain so I am going to look into that, so maybe you should also. Your never-ending stress is making your pain/depression worse so rent some really funny movies and watch them daily, it really does help. Laughter heals a lot of things so it is worth a try. I don't think you need a psychiatrist at all you just need a friend to vent to and I would love to be that friend. I dont know if we are allowed to give our email add. but I will it email@example.com if you would like to. Hope you are having a better day today...
I hate Boats!!!!
Post Lamenectomy Syndrome, Spinal Stenosis, DDD....
1999 Hemi Lamenectomy/2005 Spinal Fusion(L4-S1)
Methadone 120 mg. a day/15 mg. Oxycodone as needed(up to 4 x a day)
High Blood Pressure: Lisinopril HCTZ 10 mg. daily
Type 2 Diabetes: (March 16, 2009)
Metformin HCL ER 1000 mg. at night
I wish I could do something as well to help you out at such a rotten time. Just coming here and talking about it helps so many many of us, so keep it coming. I do not not discuss much of my health issues with my family, I am sick of all my health problems so I know they are too.
Chronic pain and depression go hand in hand. In some instances getting on the correct anti-depressant can alleviate a bit of the pain. I say any help at all is worth something. The amitriptiline (?) spelled it wrong is a very, very, very old medication that I saw used in pain mgt back in the late 70 & 80 era. Now, we have so many different anti-depressants that do not have that horrible hangover feeling. I do not handle that one well at all. Correct me if I am wrong, but is that the generic for Elavil? Have not seen that one rxd in years. Please get into your PCP and discuss the depression and get on a different one. Remember not all anti-depressants are created equal, you may have to try a couple different ones until you find the one that fits the bill.
You have had some rotten luck with drs and when that happens it puts a really bad taste in our mouths towards drs in general. But, just remember there are still some good drs out there, we just have to seek them out. Give this new dr a fair shot and who knows he may be the one you have needed in your corner all along. Word, of caution, do not ask for any medication by name, tell the dr what you have taken that has helped and what you have taken that has not helped. I always ask my drs do you have anything in mind that may help me better. I put that ball back in their court so they are the ones telling me what they would like to try me on. However, since I do not tolerate medications in general well at all, it can be a task for them. If they are good they will work with you not against you.
Make a list of questions to ask this new dr. Go in prepared so you have your ducks in line. I would tell the new dr exactly what you posted here originally, that gives a brief history and not a long drawn out deal that bores them. Being honest with them goes a long ways. Get yourself calm as possible so when you see the dr he can see the real you, not someone that is flipping in 5o million directions. You can do this, I have all the faith in the world in you managing this appt. Try looking forward to this appt as something postive and not negative. You sure do not want to give the appearance as being negative towards the dr he will be able to snse that, go in with a I need your help attitude and it will go well. Hugs to ya girl. You are not alone in this, jeesh there are alot of us in the same boat with a half of a paddle lol. Hugs, Susie
cshelp I'm so sorry you have to feel this way. CP can be so frustrating and depressing that at times I think we all just want to scream at everyone. I understand I work alot myself in a warehouse which isn't the easiest of jobs but the pay is just to good to let slip away. Its hard enough going through all this and having to work much less feeling like you are a fly on the wall when your home. I can see where you husband is coming from to a point. Just like you he might not know how to deal with such a long and painful event. If your communication is stable maybe when you feel you are having a low pain day sit down and talk with him. Heck go get a script for xanax or klonipin so you can do this. I take klonipin and I don't deal with major issues unless I've at least taken half a tablet.
I wish you all the luck and I will pray for you that your days will get easier.
We have been married for 18 yrs. We also have three children. 20, 16, 15. Its hard on all of us with my CP. Most the time they offer to do the laundry, dishes and chores. They won't let me mow the lawn or go to the grocery store by myself. My husband and I have the view treat others as you would want to be treated. My husband had two surgeries in the last year for a torn rotary cuff. I did everything for him and he always says :I'm glad I married you. With my pain he is so concerned the only time he gets upset with me is when I don't tell him when I hurt more then normal.
Not everyone can have a relationship like ours. We have been through some life changing events in our time together. His father died, my mother died, my health, his health, a child with disabilities, one child is blind in one eye and I have a crazy x-husband. I never get mad at them, I'm more than likey go to my room and suffer alone until they come in and ask if I need anything.
It took us a longtime to get to where we are today. It was not easy by any means. We almost divorced a few times, been in marriage counseling and a few separations over the years. I finally figured out about 3 or 4 years ago that I can never change him. I can never put words in his mouth or change his thinking. If I wanted to be with him till the end I would have to accept him as he is regardless of ANYTHING. He will always react to stress and situations in his own way as I do, I can not tell him whats the right reaction.
Your pain is at the forfront right now anything can make you holler. Its not an excuse but its understandable. This doctors appt or the next could be the one that helps you to find relief. Then you can deal with your relationship. I'm praying you find it.
Its late and I have to be up for work in 8 hours at 4:30 am... agghhhhh Work really kills me somedays...