Dr. appt. today

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anice
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 536
   Posted 6/16/2009 2:09 PM (GMT -7)   
I went to my doctor appt today. I left,walking through the parking lot with tears steaming down my face. It is like the floodgates opened and I couldn't shut it off. I cried all the way home. It was hard to even drive. I hate crying like that. It was the heartbreaking, painful, hurt in the heart cry. I walked in the house and went straight to my husbands arms... I have cried more since then. And as I write this, again tears flowing down my face...
 
The visit didn't last too long. He came in the room,sat down and we began to talk. I told him that I am still hurting-hips and buttock. He asked me to show him where. I stood up and showed him and set back down. I explained that the left side does indeed hurt worse than the right side. I told him that I am taking the same meds as before. I told him the OTC  meds(tylenol, motrin, aleeve) and the creams I am using. I told him about the lidocaine patches, the heating pad, hot baths and showers. I told him that I am taking the Lortab now every 8 hrs as directed and that I did take it at 7 hrs twice since the refill on Saturday. He nodded his head. I told him that I am doing the PT and walking at home. I was honest about it. I told him that there are days that I will only get 2 walks in instead of the 3. He had me stand up and bend forward with his hands on my shoulder and back, then back up and then side to side. He said everything "feels" okay. Then he put his hand on my arm and had me take a couple steps on my tiptoes and then a couple on my heels. I almost fell when I walked on my heels, but he had me by the arm. I then sat on the table and he checked my reflexes. And we talked some more. I told him that I want so much to get better, to feel better and not to hurt like this everyday. He said that it is just going to take more time and may take 6 months. I told him that I don't really know what I should or shouldn't be doing now as far as physically. He said that I should ask my PT therapist, that they should be able to help me with that. It kinda upset me. I was thinking he was the doctor and I was there to see him. He should be telling me that. He said that they were with me more than he is and they could answer those questions. He said I should be asking questions. And I was thinking, that is what I am trying to do right now!!! But ofcourse I didn't say it. He said that my surgery was more involved and intense than what he thought before going in. That the disc was pushing against the nerve on top and that there was alot of excess bone that was pushing from below. He wants me to go back to my PM for control of my pain. And he wants me to keep the appt I have and come back to him on the 26th of this month. He said that no, I am not ready to go back to work at this time. I did ask him about the medrol dose pack that was suggested. He said he didn't know if it would help on not but he did write the rx for it. I haven't had it filled yet.And that was about it.
 
I just felt so hopeless walking through the parking lot to my car. And the tears poured down my face. I guess I keep thinking about what I was told in the beginning before the surgery-the 6-8 weeks and I'd be back at work... I know that isn't possible. I understand it. I wanted it to be that way. The reality is that it isn't that way no matter how much I wanted it to be. I keep thinking about how much all this pain has effected every aspect of my life. It hurts in my heart. I used to be "normal" and have a "normal life". And now I have the life I have now. A life filled with pain, disappointment and dispair. I am so sick and tired of living like this. I want so bad to be able to laugh, and run with my kids, just to be happy again. I understand my body hasn't had time to heal from the surgery. I understand that there is a possibility that I won't always be like this. But it is hard to even have a glimmer of hope for anything better. Although it is what I want more than anything in this world. I want to have hope... Today it isn't there. I am scared about my future. I don't know what the future holds for me. I guess none of us really know that. I try to be positive. I try to push all this aside and hang on to the thought that I just haven't given it enough time... I really am trying. Today, it just hit me again like a ton of bricks fell on me.  I am down more than usual today. I will keep trying. It is just so hard. I can''t keep my thoughts right. I know all the rights of all this. I really do. I miss my job. I miss my patients. i miss the people I work with. I miss the satisfaction I get of calming the sick and scared kids and giving the parents reassurance and understanding about their kids. I have been there for 13 1/2 years. This is hard on me. I know my job won't be kept forever. I am scared about losing it. The float that is filling in for me is a RN. That is costing my doctor alot of money... I know he could get a different float. And it really isn't my problem. He wants him there working with them. The nurse that is there now, used to work for my doctor. And he is a man. They are also friends. I know my doctor is being taken care of. And I am glad of that. I am not threatened that he wants my job. He doesn't. He likes floating better now, it gives him variety. I am just worried about how long I do have until they will have to let me go and fill my position. .. I don't want to work anywhere else. I love it there. I feel quilty for being out this long. It wasn't supposed to be this way. I really didn't know that it wouldn't be. It is just hard on me. I want sooo much to go back. But I do know that I can't go back until I am physically able to. I do know that. I should just stop thinking this way. Well, knowing something and then making it that way is two different things. I know it all in my head. I just am having a hard time making it the reality that it is. I need to just focus on taking it one day at a time. And just leave the rest alone and not worry about it anymore. It is just so hard to do.
 
I am going to have to take my daughter out of daycare. And it really upsets me. I just can't afford it anymore. Money is not the greatest right now. It will be okay. She is fine. I know she will miss her friends. As long as I read to her or she watches tv, she is usually good. I can get her in another daycare, the one my son uses through the school year. But I have no clue to the when-the start date. So I really may be making a big mistake pulling her out and not having a definite backup plan. I just really don't have another choice at this time than to pull her out. I just hate calling and telling them this...But I don't have any choice...It looks like I am going to be off work longer, although again I don't know how long...
 
I talked to my son today. He said to give him a few more days to see if he wants to come home or not. And ofcourse, I will. I am not really sure how I can get him home anyway. My sister said the she might be able to go get him for me or meet my parents half way to get him. I thought that was sweet of her. But we'll see if a few days, I guess. I know he wants to come home. I think the problem is that he doesn't want to make them mad at him or hurt their feelings. I told him that I loved him. And that if he chose to come home, that would be wonderful. But that if he decided to stay, then it would be okay too. I told him that I wanted him to be happy and that it was the most important to me.
 
Sorry again to make this so long. I just needed to vent,again. I will be okay. I will get myself back together. I don't know why I ended up this way today... I wasn't in this mindset before the appt. this morning...
Anice

straydog
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Feb 2003
Total Posts : 13459
   Posted 6/16/2009 3:07 PM (GMT -7)   

Hey Girl,

Ok, slow down take a big deep breath. So, the appt was not what you expected. Please keep in mind surgeons are different ducks so to speak. This guy assumed and gave you his usual speech of going back to work 6-8 weeks post surgery. Its the same one he has given all of his other patients that had your type of surgery. Its called textbook medicine. I would hate to hear what he tells his fusion patients. But on the other side of the coin, do you think alot of people would give in and have surgery if they were told they would be off work for 6 months to one year. Most would say no and walk out. Economics is in their mind, I cannot afford to be out that long end of story.

Now, I agree totally with what he says about talking to your physical therapist. Why, the PT person watches you, see's where your deficits are, knows what needs work. You walking into the drs office and doing his little stand up, sit down, tip toe, heel walk, bend over, thing is not enough for him to know what you are capable of doing in an average day,  think about it.  He is with you at best fifteen minutes at your appts, that cannot possibly tell him what you need or don't need. He did give you some valuable info Anice, your surgery was a little more involved than what he thought.

Now is the time for you to get with your physical therapist and put a plan of action together that will rehab you back to where you need to be to get you back functioning fully. Back to where you can return to your job. This is going to be tough, nothing is ever easy. You must stop your might set you are in now, about all you are doing is totally overwhelming yourself and yes it is and will interfere with your recovery. PaLady and the others on here have told you how valuable a good PT can be in your recovery. This is so true, I have seen it first hand. Actually for our clients, PT is what got our folks back up on their feet and back to work. It sure was not the surgeon. His part is done, he corrected the problem surgically which all any of them ever do. The physical therapy was the key to the whole thing. It was the final piece to the puzzle.

I would get the script of Medrol DosePak filled and give it a try it can only help, it certainly will not hurt anything. But, do not take the Mobic with it.

Emotionally you are going to have to get yourself to a better place than where you are today. Its tough but you can do it. if you feel depression is setting in go see your PCP. Put all that negative crap away and turn it to rehabing yourself. Talk to your PT and let them know how the appt went with your dr and how the dr said to talk to them about what your needs are as far as rehab goes. Concentrate on your rehab. Be sure your PT person has a job description of what your work day is like. Get an appt ASAP with your pain mgt dr and get that handled.

Above all let you job know what is going on. I do not think I would say the dr said I will be out 6 months. I would say that the dr wants me rehabbed to the best of my ability before he will let me return to work. Let them know you are in the process of having a program put together.

Please get yourself calmed down. It is not helping your situation at all, you are adding stress you don't need. You have had a good cry and gotten it out. Yes, you will go back to your job. Its just a little bumpier there than you knew. Thats ok, when we hit a speed bump we slow down so should you. This will pass and you will look back on it and say, Anice what were you thinking about going back to work so soon!! Each person is different in how they heal remember that. The ball is in your court now, you just have not figured that one out yet-but you will. Hugs, Susie


crohns disease dx 2002 & small bowel resection, still looking for remission whatever that is, chronic pain 22 yrs, added ulcerative colitis 6-05 to the mix, high blood pressure 28 yrs, aortic heart valve insuffiency, peripheral neuropathy hands & feet, COPD & on oxygen therapy, lupus & decreased circulation in both legs. Too many surgeries to list and too many medications to list. Currently on 16 different daily medications. Intrathecal pain pump implanted June 05.


Mrs. Dani
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2009
Total Posts : 2787
   Posted 6/16/2009 3:49 PM (GMT -7)   
sad  
*warmest huggs*
 
... And I think, story time sounds way cooler :-)   Maybe read "movie books"? My girls and I are on "Fairy Haven and the Quest for the Wand". I hear it will be comming out in the theatres soon.
 
I dont think I could ever be as strong as you. I would have just crumbled were I in your shoes. *warmest huggs* You ve worked so hard to get back on your feet. Try to realx and take it easy. Valerian root tea? Maybe cammomile?
 
dani
TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,  
And sorry I could not travel both  
And be one traveler, long I stood


anice
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 536
   Posted 6/16/2009 5:44 PM (GMT -7)   
The dr. said that it may take 6 months to recover. I hope it didn't mean that I would be off from work for 6 months! That is what I thought walking out of his office too. That is part of what made the floodgates open up. I hope that isn't what he meant! I do go back on the 26th. Hopefully by then, I will find out more.
Anice

fatherjohn
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2009
Total Posts : 999
   Posted 6/16/2009 8:02 PM (GMT -7)   

Anice, I know I started behind on PT after my frist surgery. The Surgeon wanted to wait longer than normal and the PT told me that in his oppinion, it made my recovery tougher. I was told by others who had back surgery that PT would be painful and difficult but if I did not give in or up and do the stretches and exercises at home, it would help. Even though mu back surgery was considered a failure, PT was what helped me get where I could continue. I would advise you to discuss the frustration and the goal over with your PT and get a schedule to follow.  

I also agree with Susie that it is time to give yourself a break. I am glad that your husband was at home when you returned home and has been able to give you support. Surgeons know that everyone heals at a different rate and they are also aware that not everyone will be ready in 6 to 8 weeks. It also depends on the kind of job you have. The more physical your job, the more you want that healing to be as far along as possible. You have so many things that are going on and the more strung out you allow yourself to go mentally, it can hinder the healing. Any one of us that have gone through back surgery knows it is not easy. My surgeon told me up front that the multilevel fusion surgery is one of the most painful surgeries there is. He also told me that it will take at least a year for the heling process. We will continue to hang in there with you. Tomorrow is another day.  


PAlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 6/16/2009 8:59 PM (GMT -7)   
Anice,
I really can understand why you were so hit in the "heart" today. I think part of you knows that things are going much more slowly than what you'd planned, and we've even said things, but when you finally hear it from your doctor that makes it official.

I think what Susie said about why doctors give unrealistic timetables for recovery is right on. That most of us wouldn't have the surgery if we knew how long the recovery would be. And those comments about things being more complicated than what he thought....well, I think those go along with the unrealistic timetables. My doctor told me 3 hours in surgery; it was 6. Told me 3 days in the hospital; it was a week. And he said how it was all "more complicated" once he got in. They even started to cut a second incision to go in from both sides, because he didn't think he could get the hardware for the fusion in place from the one side, but fortunately he did.

We want so much to feel like our old selves again. To be "normal" again. Feel good. Enjoy life. Work. Laugh. Go out with friends, etc., etc. etc. So we're desperate and vulnerable and try just about everything and then some to get there. Some people maybe are lucky enough to get there, but they're probably not posting to this board. I hope they're out living their lives. I hope you will be again, too, but it just won't be as soon as you want. You know that now, so you have to prepare your life to make that adjustment. And then just do your best with your doctors and PT to heal as much as possible. Unfortunately, we can't put the process on fast foward! So vent here and do what you need but try to make peace with a reality that's different from what you wanted or expected, at least in terms of your timetable. There's nothing more you can do about that but work with it.

We're here. You're not alone. And we understand.

(((((((((((Anice))))))))))

PaLady

edt
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 773
   Posted 6/16/2009 9:11 PM (GMT -7)   

Anice,

I am so sorry to hear what happened to you today.  Straydog, PALady and FatherJohn have given you great advice and info.

Similar scenario for me I was told 3 hours for surgery it took 8, I was told double CS fusion ended up with Triple fusion, I thought it would be a mere 6 weeks to recoup it was 11 mos....I was told at 11 mos. the picture was grim because of the spinal cord damage from the ruptures, didn't believe him returned to work......Just stay focused on today and do all of your PT and meds...thats all you can do right now. We are here for you ALWAYS!!

(((((((((((((((((((((ANICE)))))))))))))))))))))))

XXOO
patti 


golitho
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 1670
   Posted 6/16/2009 9:25 PM (GMT -7)   
Big hugs Anice, How disappointing for you and disheartening too to suddenly have a 6 months added to your timetable!!! Everyone has given such good advice, just take it easy, don't give yourself a hard time. I think you need to grieve for that lost you. But most of all we're here, your cyber buddy, golitho.

anice
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 536
   Posted 6/16/2009 10:00 PM (GMT -7)   
I want to say something. I really do love you guys and gals. You all have been so great to me. I am sorry if it sounded like I am on my pity pot. I don't want to be that way. Thank you all for your understanding. You know what you are talking about. Unfortunately, there are many of you that have had back surgery. And mine was suposed to be the minor one. I almost want to laugh at that one. This has hurt me like ... I am sorry for those of you that have had the more complicated, severe fusions. I can't imagine what pain you had to go through. And I thought this has been bad...

This evening, I find myself wondering what the 6 months really means. Surely it doesn't mean that I can't go back to work until then. I hope that isn't the case. But, I won't let myself go there any more today. All the tears, and being soo upset has left me feeling physically drained. I almost feel lethargic in a way. It just took alot out of me. I cried a pretty big bucket of tears today! Tomorrow will be another day, and I'll continue to try.

I have the PT tomorrow. So far all I have done is walk on the treadmill in the water for 30 minutes. She hasn't done anything else. I will talk to her tomorrow and see what she says. I only have tomorrow and then next Monday left for the PT. Then I have the re-evaluation w/ the other therapist. I guess I'll know more after I finish these up. I would think it will take more than this to get me going.

I do plan on going back to my PM. I liked him pretty good before when I went. I need to wait a little while 'til I can afford to go. That is a $40 copay. And I just don't have the extra money right now. I am okay on my meds. But I know that I need to go may go ahead and make the appt. tomorrow. I get paid next Friday.Maybe I can get an appt for then. I'll figure it out. I know one thing. I don't want to do any more injections. I don't know if he'll even suggest them. But they are painful and they don't last-been there, done that. And I don't want to do it again... I don't mean to be noncompliant, I just don't believe they provide any relief and certainly not for long enough to justify it.

Goodnight all. I do hope you all are able to sleep tonight. My husband promised me a back rub. He knows I have been upset and crying all day. It was his suggestion. And I think I do need one.
Anice

straydog
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Feb 2003
Total Posts : 13459
   Posted 6/16/2009 11:19 PM (GMT -7)   

Hello Anice,

Its your cheerleader speaking again,lol. Key word dr said it may take 6 months. He left the door open on that one to heal or return to work. That one is up to you. I will say put the 6 months totally out of your mind. Stop putting high expectations on yourself its really hindering your recovery. Learn to concentrate on the day it is only. You simply need to tell yourself each morning upon rising today will be a little better than yesterday. Get rid of the garbage that is cluttering your mind so you can concentrate on the important issues. Letting your mind race with 50 million different things is just torturing yourself, then in the midst of that you forget and lose track of your goal. Tell yourself my goal is to heal properly and rehab myself so I can return to work. Do not give yourself a time limit. I think if you can get yourself calmed down enough and really work at this you will see starting to fall in place as they should. The negative thoughts are using up good energy and taking your mind off the important things.

Stop the what ifs, they will eat your lunch, instead its when I return to work, The other things will all fall into place as they come. Your mind set is just as important as your rehab, its all in the attitude and keeping your head on straight. You are a high strung person no doubt.

Again, watch how long you sit at intervals-stay away from the recliner. Limit your sitting time to 20 minute intervals get up move around some then go sit back down. Always set in a straight back chair with your feet on the floor. You need good posture. Remember sitting causes lots of stress and pressure on your back just as it will the buttocks and hips. Go lie down a few times day even if its for only 15 minutes at a time. Tell yourself this is part of my rehab. It is not laziness girl. Try to do little stretches when laying down. Also, do you know how to make your body relax? I learned how to relax my body through a hypnotist that I went to it was amazing being able to relax myself starting from my toes up. Sounds wild huh lol? It worked so who cared.

Our clients that had lammies all returned back to their jobs. For some it took a little longer than it did others. Thats because we are all different and heal different. Some of our slow starters were the ones that put too high expectations on themselves, the what if's totally overwhelmed them and got in the way. They were basically setting themselves up for a fall because they were not able to look at the big picture realistically. They learned that eventually everything did fall into.\ place.

Make your appt with PM dr so you don't get too far out for an appt. Forget all the things that has happened since surgery put it away in drawer somewhere. Concentrate on now, not yesterday or the day before. You can and will do this if you approach it correctly. Hugs, Susie

 

 


crohns disease dx 2002 & small bowel resection, still looking for remission whatever that is, chronic pain 22 yrs, added ulcerative colitis 6-05 to the mix, high blood pressure 28 yrs, aortic heart valve insuffiency, peripheral neuropathy hands & feet, COPD & on oxygen therapy, lupus & decreased circulation in both legs. Too many surgeries to list and too many medications to list. Currently on 16 different daily medications. Intrathecal pain pump implanted June 05.


anice
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 536
   Posted 6/17/2009 8:17 AM (GMT -7)   
Susie, You are my cheerleader!! Thank you for your encouragement. It means so much to me. And you know what you are talking about. And it does help. I will start living my life for the "today". I am going to try to put all this extra someplace else-a drawer- like you said. I can only deal with one thing at a time. And yes, I am high strung,unfortunetly-always have been. I think I need to get back on Xanax again. I started taking it in '98 after my husband passed away. It would take a long time to go through a rx b/c I only took it on an as needed basis.I have been out for a long time. I will call my pcp today and talk to them about it. I hope I don't have to go in. Money is tight right now. I called for in several weeks ago-the nurse called me back and I explained it all to them. I never got a return call and the pharmacy didn't get it. I guess I got side tracked-imagine that. And I didn't follow through afterwards. I'll get that taken care of today. I think I may need to take advantage of the employee assistance program from work. It is for counseling and it is free for up to 3 or 5 sessions. I thought about that before, and then said that I don't need it. I could do it myself. Well, as much as I wish i could, I think I do need to take advantage of the offer. I have done it before. I just have so much inside, that I feel like I am going to blow one day! It has just added up to more and more and more. I do need to do this for myself. So those are the 2 phone calls I plan to make today. I think it is a good decision for me. Oh, and I do need to set up the PM appt. too. I have PT today too. I wish you all a low pain day and lots of hugs.
Anice

solar powered
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 538
   Posted 6/17/2009 8:24 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Anice. I hope that you are feeling at least a little bit better today. I usually post on the fibro board but wanted to add something about the dr wanting you to ask questions,etc of your PT. I totally understand you wanting the doctor to know everything, I mean that's why we go to them, right? Anyway I have multiple orthopedic issues that conventional physical therapy wasn't able to help with so my ortho guy finally sent me to a chiropractor who specializes in physical rehab. In the course of the conversation with the ortho, he admitted that there was a lot about the rehab process that he didn't know or understand. He is an excellent surgeon and his job is to cut. PT's job is to take up where the surgeon left off and help the healing process. A division of labor of sorts. I think maybe your dr was trying to tell you the same thing but wasn't quite so blunt about it. Please try to breathe and be kind to yourself. Lisa
Life is the ultimate contact sport. Train accordingly and play hard.


LLPLUV
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 1158
   Posted 6/17/2009 2:17 PM (GMT -7)   
Anice my husband was told he would be back to work in 8 weeks which ended up to be 5 months. At the 12 week mark the surgeon said it would be 6 months but he was back to work in two after that. In the beginning everyone is right they tell you a textbook amount of time then after that time they give you the longer amount of time. Usually you'll be back to work within that amount of time.

I fully understand the tears from the heart. At times I think our mind has to cry from the heart to be able to move on and deal with more. You are in a very stressful time in your life with the surgery, son and husband. That so much STUFF anyone would have to just stop what they are doing and just CRY.

Gentle hugs to you and hope you can have a somewhat low pain day

Laurie
39 yr young female with,
Chronic Kidney Stones, PKD (Polycystic Kidney Disease), Chronic Kidney Failure, Severe Hypertension, Urological RSD
Also CHF (Congestive Heart Failure) and Sleep Apnea
Hopefully NO MORE........ I think I have it all


PAlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 6/17/2009 2:54 PM (GMT -7)   
Our mind crying from the heart in order to move on. That's pretty profound Laurie. And I think very true.

Thanks for sharing that.

PaLady

anice
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 536
   Posted 6/17/2009 3:34 PM (GMT -7)   
Laurie, I agree with PaLady. Your word were indeed profound. "At times I think our mind has to cry from the heart to be able to move on and deal with more". What a beautiful way of putting it. You did good, girl! I will always remember that. You stated it perfectly. I am sure that it impacted the others as it did PaLady and me. Thank you for sharing that. It really touched me. All of you have touched me over and over again with your words of encouragement.
Anice

LLPLUV
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 1158
   Posted 6/17/2009 3:54 PM (GMT -7)   

I'm happy I could make you feel something other than pain and frustration.... tongue

Usually I keep my profound statements to myself so others don't think I'm crazy and insane.  My kids always tell me to stop being ghandi or Buda...lol  I like my saying Your the Master of your own destiny.......

Thank you for your comment.  I hope your day is going better then yesterday..

Laurie


39 yr young female with,
Chronic Kidney Stones, PKD (Polycystic Kidney Disease), Chronic Kidney Failure, Severe Hypertension, Urological RSD
Also CHF (Congestive Heart Failure) and Sleep Apnea
Hopefully NO MORE........ I think I have it all


skeye
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 2976
   Posted 6/17/2009 7:25 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Anice,

I'm so sorry that your appointment wasn't what you expected. I can't even tell you how many times I have left doctors appointments in tears because I had gotten my hopes up to high, or the doctor didn't listen to me, or he told me something devastating, etc! I really do feel for you. I wish I could just give you a big hug & tell you that everything will be okay. I know that it is a big let down, to find that you are healing slower than expected, and that going back to work is still out of the picture. I've never had back surgery, but I've had several other major orthopedic surgeries & I've always found that the doctor's estimate for when I should be able to do such & such, and the length of my recovery time has been waaay off. They usually told me 6-9 months & I found that it took me a year & a half, minimum. I think the doctors use a different time table. They look at the time in which it takes body parts to heal to certain amounts, but they forget about all the trauma that was doing to the surrounding tissue/joint, and the time it takes to learn & relearn how to manage your body. There are so many different factors that affect recovery & they only consider the most basic ones. I do hope that it does not take you a full 6 mo to recover fully enough to return to work; I know that this whole process must be very hard on you, emotionally as well as physically. Would it be possible to return to work part time? Even for just a couple of hours a day, maybe sitting at a desk to begin with. Could you just return patient's phone calls, or do paperwork? Something to get your mind & your body refocused, and it would also be a way to get you back, albeit in a limited capacity, & interacting with your patients & co-workers again.

I know that it is hard not to feel "normal," but you will be so again. You will heal, you will return to work, and hopefully this pain that has been plaguing you since the surgery, will dissipate with time. Just take things one step at a time. Even hour by hour, that's how I do it. I used to plan ahead/look ahead for days, even weeks, but now, an hour is all I can handle. I think "okay, what do I have to do to get me through this hour?" Just don't give up. If anything, this should be motivation to fight even harder. Go to PT, do your exercises, give your back every chance it can get to heal, and maybe, hopefully, you will be back to work within a matter of weeks, rather than months. You can do it! I have faith in you, as does everyone here! Give it your best & prove that doc wrong! But don't forget to take time out for yourself as well. You can't work at your rehab every minute of every day. If you can, try to spend some quiet time by yourself: meditate, take a nice long bath, or even just drink a cup of tea & read a book. Stress hinders the healing process, any chance you can get to relax, take! You are going to do just fine! (((((((((((Anice)))))))))))))

many hugs,
Skeye

anice
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 536
   Posted 6/17/2009 9:12 PM (GMT -7)   
Skeye, Thank you for you encouraging words. I appreciate it so much. It helps to know that all of you understand and care. I don't know what I would do without
all of you.

I hope that you are doing okay. I need to catch up again on everyones' posts. I have gotten behind again. I wish you the best and a good nights sleep. Take care of yourself.
Anice

golitho
Veteran Member


Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 1670
   Posted 6/17/2009 9:31 PM (GMT -7)   
I also find with surgeons that they fail to mention scar tissue before the op and each time for me scar tissue has caused pain or adhesions and thrown that extra spanner in the works! I dread surgery now, they make it sound so easy to recover!!! I think crying is good too lets all the emotions bubble out and helps so much in the healing, just keep going with your exercises, chipping away and eventually you'll notice improvements... then you can feel you're getting somewhere. Keep going Anice, you're very strong, you can get over this new hurdle, take care, golitho
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