Melissa, Welcome to the CP forum. I know you posted days ago introducing yourself and from my experience, you have found a great place to find help, comfort and encouragement. Like others I have lived with pain for a length of time, 11 years. I have seen more doctors, tried more meds and spent more sleepless nights than I ever thought was possible. First off, it is obvious that you did not choose to be in pain. If there was another answer, you would have and already have addressed it. To have to rely on pain meds for a functioning level of life, then you are not an addict. Will you become one? I think if you were going to be an addict you would not be asking that question. I run a program for addicts and addiction is so different. I deal with addicts every day of my life and I myself was an addict. I am on pain meds but it is not the same as when I was in my addiction.
Taking pain meds is not what we want to do. People like us want to continue our lives in a way that pain does not control every part of our life. The problem for most of us, the pain level will not diminish so we need how to learn to live with it. It was not our choice but it is our life. I would suggest that you find a secure place to store your meds when you start them. I am not sure how much access your brother would have to them or others as well. It is a very wise thing to make sure they are seciure to protect you and others. Take a deep breath and realize that life will go on and you will continue to enjoy your life. We are always here to help one another.