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uniquelyme
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 1037
   Posted 6/25/2009 9:37 AM (GMT -7)   
 
 
Well,
It seems like I have some decent news to report... No, I didn't do anything stupid..and I was rewarded by the Gods for it.  I found my daily pill box in my underwear drawer and it had some methadone in it.  Not a lot, only about 46, but enough that I can take maybe 50 mg. a day for about 8 days... That is still not enough to make it until the 9th, but it is def. better than before.
 
I want to thank all of you for making me think very hard about what I ws thinking about doing.  I know how easy it would have been to go out and find something, but it wouldn't have helped my soul.  I would have been so guilty. 
 
So, thanks....I think I will be okay for a while...Just took my first 50 mg. and just knowing that I have something makes me fel better.  It is amazing that the mental part of withdrawl is almost as bad as the physical part...Mind over matter.....
 
Me.

 I hate Boats!!!!
 
Post Lamenectomy Syndrome, Spinal Stenosis, DDD....
1999 Hemi Lamenectomy/2005 Spinal Fusion(L4-S1)
Methadone 120 mg. a day/15 mg. Oxycodone as needed(up to 4 x a day)
High Blood Pressure: Lisinopril HCTZ 10 mg. daily
Type 2 Diabetes: (March 16, 2009)
Metformin HCL ER 1000 mg. at night..Glipizide 10mg. 2X in the morning
Lantus 10 units at bedtime with Solostar Pen                                                                   

 


straydog
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Feb 2003
Total Posts : 13451
   Posted 6/25/2009 1:15 PM (GMT -7)   
Ronda, wow so glad you found the extras. I just read what all has been going on with you. Enough girl!! You sure do not need to be going thru withdrawals on top of everything else. I hope things settle down for you, you need a break.
Straydog/Susie
Moderator Chronic Pain
 
crohns disease dx 2002 & small bowel resection, still looking for remission whatever that is, chronic pain 22 yrs, added ulcerative colitis 6-05 to the mix, high blood pressure 28 yrs, aortic heart valve insuffiency, depression, osteoarthritis, osteoporosis lumbar spine, scoliosis lumbar spine, peripheral neuropathy hands & feet, COPD & on oxygen therapy, lupus & decreased circulation in both legs. Too many surgeries to list and too many medications to list. Currently on 16 different daily medications. Intrathecal pain pump implanted June 05.


PAlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 6/25/2009 3:22 PM (GMT -7)   
Me,
I'm glad you didn't do anything stupid and that you found something to help ease the withdrawals. But I would encourage you to now use this time to be proactive in dealing with the situation so you don't run completely out. Please don't just wait until these run out and then return to the same state you were in, and thinking about things you don't want to get involved in.

I think it was fatherjohn who suggested writing and hand delivering a letter directly to your doctor in the other thread; I think that's a great idea to do now, and not a threatening letter, but one that clearly lays out the situation with your son, the lock box you keep, the withdrawal symptoms combined with your other health conditions, and maybe say you just don't understand why he's refusing to see you sooner.

Please, think about doing something positive and proactive now rather than waiting, ok?

PaLady

uniquelyme
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 1037
   Posted 6/25/2009 7:08 PM (GMT -7)   
 
 
PaLady,
Well, I actually made another phone call to my Dr. and said the following: Does it matter to you that I am Diabetic and have HBP?  That I had my son move out and go live with his father? That I did have the pills in a lock box but that a momentary lapse left them vulnarable?  I also told them how guilty I feel because this was all my fault...That I am so darned worried about how all of this will effect my son , and his future mental health... That I will only keep 1 weeks worth of medication on my person at a time so that this will Never happen again.....
 
I hate to admit it but I started crying on the phone.  Now I have to wait and see...again.  If they won't help me then so be it.  I cannot put myself in a grave worrying about it.  I have something to take, not nearly enough, but some.  That makes me feel a bit better.  Not much, but some...
 
I did tell them about the methadone that I found.... I took 50 mg. today...tomorrow I will only take 20...I will repeat that 50 and then 20 until I run out.  That would be 14 in 4 days...I have 35 left.  I don't know, I am still not feeling good at all...so my brain is working at a quarter capicity....
 
I think I will make it...I have to.  The 9th is so far away and it is so hard to think about.  What else is gonna happen?
 
I shouldn't have said that.....
 
Me. 

 I hate Boats!!!!
 
Post Lamenectomy Syndrome, Spinal Stenosis, DDD....
1999 Hemi Lamenectomy/2005 Spinal Fusion(L4-S1)
Methadone 120 mg. a day/15 mg. Oxycodone as needed(up to 4 x a day)
High Blood Pressure: Lisinopril HCTZ 10 mg. daily
Type 2 Diabetes: (March 16, 2009)
Metformin HCL ER 1000 mg. at night..Glipizide 10mg. 2X in the morning
Lantus 20 units at bedtime with Solostar Pen                                                                   

 


edt
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 773
   Posted 6/25/2009 8:19 PM (GMT -7)   

Me,

I think you did the right thing!  I am praying that your Dr. hears your heartfelt message and sees the truth of your situation!

((((((((((((ME)))))))))))

XXOO
Patti


Mrs. Dani
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2009
Total Posts : 2787
   Posted 6/25/2009 10:33 PM (GMT -7)   
:-)  
            Dear Me,
 
     I am sorry that they wont see you sooner. And that you had to take old medications... do they expire? I know when I have medacines they pyt little expiration dates on the sides.
 
   *huggs*
dani
TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,  
And sorry I could not travel both  
And be one traveler, long I stood


straydog
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Feb 2003
Total Posts : 13451
   Posted 6/26/2009 12:52 AM (GMT -7)   
Rhonda you did the right thing girl in calling your dr. I sure hope they he will listen and give you a break. You don't need this crap on top of what you have already gone thru. Usually if a patient has not ran short before the drs are willing to give us a benefit of a doubt. Lets hope & pray he listens.
Straydog/Susie
Moderator Chronic Pain
 
crohns disease dx 2002 & small bowel resection, still looking for remission whatever that is, chronic pain 22 yrs, added ulcerative colitis 6-05 to the mix, high blood pressure 28 yrs, aortic heart valve insuffiency, depression, osteoarthritis, osteoporosis lumbar spine, scoliosis lumbar spine, peripheral neuropathy hands & feet, COPD & on oxygen therapy, lupus & decreased circulation in both legs. Too many surgeries to list and too many medications to list. Currently on 16 different daily medications. Intrathecal pain pump implanted June 05.


uniquelyme
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 1037
   Posted 6/26/2009 4:44 PM (GMT -7)   
I talked to the Dr. office again today and they are still saying the same thing....See you on the 9th. The nurse told me to really be careful with the meds I found so that I don't run out again...Like she cares???? Anyway, I know that this is only a short repreave, I will run out again before my visit, so I am not feeling all that great. I guess it's mostly mental... But, I am glad that I didn't go out and do something that I would have regretted....Maybe I can make it after all...

Me.
 I hate Boats!!!!
 
Post Lamenectomy Syndrome, Spinal Stenosis, DDD....
1999 Hemi Lamenectomy/2005 Spinal Fusion(L4-S1)
Methadone 120 mg. a day/15 mg. Oxycodone as needed(up to 4 x a day)
High Blood Pressure: Lisinopril HCTZ 10 mg. daily
Type 2 Diabetes: (March 16, 2009)
Metformin HCL ER 1000 mg. at night..Glipizide 10mg. 2X in the morning
Lantus 20 units at bedtime with Solostar Pen                                                                   

 


Stella Marie
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2005
Total Posts : 601
   Posted 6/26/2009 9:07 PM (GMT -7)   
Me,
I am glad you found that small stash of meds. They sure were heaven sent. I have some real concerns about your PM doctor. Unfortunately, unplanned accidents do happen in our lives. If something like this happens only once and you do not habitually request additional medications, I feel your doctor should at least be willing to see you and discuss the situation. If you have not crossed the line in the past, their stance seems extremely harsh. If you feel that you have complied with their pain contract and this is the way they handle unique problems, maybe it is time to look for a different PM doctor. I feel that patients and doctors are a team and need to respect each other and work together. If my doctor did not trust me or was not even willing to see me in person to discuss a situation, I would have to reevaluate the working relationship. Sounds like this doctor could easily leave you high and dry without any explanation. This type of behavior - a blanket no - concerns me.

Again, just my feelings about the situation.

Stella Marie

Co-Forum Moderator for Chronic Pain

Rare neurodegenerative disease called “Multiple System Atrophy”. a very rare neurodegenrative disease ..i.e. brain rot.  Mobility issues,, O2 , intrathecal pump, neurostimulator, neuropathic pain,  spasticity, central apnea, oesteoarthritis, colitis...etc..etc.

 


Stella Marie
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2005
Total Posts : 601
   Posted 6/26/2009 9:07 PM (GMT -7)   
Me,
I am glad you found that small stash of meds. They sure were heaven sent. I have some real concerns about your PM doctor. Unfortunately, unplanned accidents do happen in our lives. If something like this happens only once and you do not habitually request additional medications, I feel your doctor should at least be willing to see you and discuss the situation. If you have not crossed the line in the past, their stance seems extremely harsh. If you feel that you have complied with their pain contract and this is the way they handle unique problems, maybe it is time to look for a different PM doctor. I feel that patients and doctors are a team and need to respect each other and work together. If my doctor did not trust me or was not even willing to see me in person to discuss a situation, I would have to reevaluate the working relationship. Sounds like this doctor could easily leave you high and dry without any explanation. This type of behavior - a blanket no - concerns me.

Again, just my feelings about the situation.

Stella Marie

Co-Forum Moderator for Chronic Pain

Rare neurodegenerative disease called “Multiple System Atrophy”. a very rare neurodegenrative disease ..i.e. brain rot.  Mobility issues,, O2 , intrathecal pump, neurostimulator, neuropathic pain,  spasticity, central apnea, oesteoarthritis, colitis...etc..etc.

 


LLPLUV
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 1158
   Posted 6/27/2009 8:07 AM (GMT -7)   
(((((((ME))))))) In the future if and when you are ready or if not please email me and I will give you the numbers to my pain group. I know it would be a few more miles away for you instead of summit its in antioch. Just a few more miles. But they are great. So if ever you need me I will email you all the information.

I'm so glad you found a stash!!!!

Laurie
39 yr young female with,
Chronic Kidney Stones, PKD (Polycystic Kidney Disease), Chronic Kidney Failure, Severe Hypertension, Urological RSD
Also CHF (Congestive Heart Failure) and Sleep Apnea
Hopefully NO MORE........ I think I have it all


PAlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 6/27/2009 9:45 PM (GMT -7)   
Me,
I wanted to bump this post up because a lot of people seem to be responding to the thread you started first, instead of this update.

Hugs,

PaLady

uniquelyme
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 1037
   Posted 6/27/2009 9:52 PM (GMT -7)   
 
 
Thanks, I am glad I found them too...but, they aren't going to last for very long and since I'm only taking a few a day, the pain is still there as well as the withdrawls.  I am so used to taking 120 mg. a day that taking 30 mg. is really nothing....
 
The Dr. that I go to is normally pretty great.  When I didn't have insurance they only charged me $80 a visit...much less then anywhere else from what I have heard...Some people I have talked to pay as much as $300 a visit..not including the meds.   And I hear that it takes a very long time to get into a new Dr. 
 
I appreciate the offer and I may have to take you up on that...I'll wait and see what happens when i go on the 9th...If I can make it until then, sometimes I doubt I can.
 
This is the worst I have ever felt in my life....the pain is unbearable... And nothing, I mean nothing is helping.  All I do is lay in bed, watch the clock, and sweat...and cry.
 
Please don't ever let this happen to you.  I know if my friend had this happen to them I would be over there in a min. with whatever they needed...because I wouldn't wish this on anybody....
 
Me.

 I hate Boats!!!!
 
Post Lamenectomy Syndrome, Spinal Stenosis, DDD....
1999 Hemi Lamenectomy/2005 Spinal Fusion(L4-S1)
Methadone 120 mg. a day/15 mg. Oxycodone as needed(up to 4 x a day)
High Blood Pressure: Lisinopril HCTZ 10 mg. daily
Type 2 Diabetes: (March 16, 2009)
Metformin HCL ER 1000 mg. at night..Glipizide 10mg. 2X in the morning
Lantus 20 units at bedtime with Solostar Pen                                                                   

 


LLPLUV
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 1158
   Posted 6/28/2009 4:21 PM (GMT -7)   

I dont have methadone on me but I have me...  So if you ever need me just email and I will be over when I have a spare minute.  I work Tuesday thru Thursday from 6:00 am to 4:30 pm.  Mondays I have procedures.  But other than those hours I'm free....

So just yell for me even if you don't know me and it will only take 20 minutes to get to you....

Laurie


39 yr young female with,
Chronic Kidney Stones, PKD (Polycystic Kidney Disease), Chronic Kidney Failure, Severe Hypertension, Urological RSD
Also CHF (Congestive Heart Failure) and Sleep Apnea
Hopefully NO MORE........ I think I have it all


uniquelyme
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 1037
   Posted 6/28/2009 4:27 PM (GMT -7)   
 
 
Thanks...and I really mean it.  So much of this is mental, and my mental state is iffy at best on a good day.  I just hope that when I DO go back they don't pull a whammy on me and say "We can't help you anymore...bye bye".  That would be the worst thing ever.  Especially after going without.
 
So, thanks for the offer...I might take you up on it.
 
Me.

 I hate Boats!!!!
 
Post Lamenectomy Syndrome, Spinal Stenosis, DDD....
1999 Hemi Lamenectomy/2005 Spinal Fusion(L4-S1)
Methadone 120 mg. a day/15 mg. Oxycodone as needed(up to 4 x a day)
High Blood Pressure: Lisinopril HCTZ 10 mg. daily
Type 2 Diabetes: (March 16, 2009)
Metformin HCL ER 1000 mg. at night..Glipizide 10mg. 2X in the morning
Lantus 20 units at bedtime with Solostar Pen                                                                   

 


LLPLUV
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 1158
   Posted 6/28/2009 4:32 PM (GMT -7)   

If they say no more to you then you can have them fax a release to The Pain Group they can get you in within 48 hours if you are out of your meds.

I'm always willing to drive to you I love the drive out there.  My sister usually forces me to go that way to flea market with her in Lebonan.  We should hook up when you get back to normal for lunch I'll buy.  Well ok normal is not relevant any longer for any of us.

As long as you don't mind that I'm kinda loopy and redneckish.  My husband has rubbed off on me...lol

I hope you can at least get some sleep tonight.

Hugs

Laurie


39 yr young female with,
Chronic Kidney Stones, PKD (Polycystic Kidney Disease), Chronic Kidney Failure, Severe Hypertension, Urological RSD
Also CHF (Congestive Heart Failure) and Sleep Apnea
Hopefully NO MORE........ I think I have it all

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