hurting bad!!!

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anice
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 536
   Posted 7/4/2009 7:41 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi friends, I was in more pain last night than usual. I took my bath and laid on the heating pad. I usually don't stay on it long, but last night I did. I just felt like I needed more. Anyway, when I tried to get up, it was all together different. I could barely walk!!! The pain was unbearable. I was nauseated, and shaking I hurt sooo bad. I had already taken the percocet and flexiril. Tears started and I sobbed. I felt like I did right after surgery. I was in agony...  It is a little better this mornig, but not alot. And I did just vomit. I don't have a stomach bug or anything. I think it is b/c I hurt so d... much. My brother, his wife and granddaughter will all be here in 4 hours!!! I feel horrible! I don't think I can do this!!! As I sit to write this, I have stabbing pains in my  back, hip and buttock-orcourse, on the left side. I feel like I have been severly beaten with a baseball bat!!!
 
Some of you have stated you think I have been doing too much before. I didn't think I did. I know that the past couple of days, I have been doing too much. And this is the price I am paying for it. I cooked twice yesterday. I wanted to. Husband told me not to. He would do it. But I wanted to do it. Last night he took his kids home, thank God. Anyway, his mother was in the recliner. She wanted to go to get on the potty(which is in my living room!!!). She has arthritis bad and can not walk without assistance and her walker. Her knees are pushed together and feet turn in. Anyway, I tried to help her up. My son said "mommy don't", but what was I suposed to do? I tried. She couldn't get up. I tried to lift her. It was dead body weight. We tried several times, and just gave up. She was getting too tired. She just sat back in the recliner and waited for husband to get back.I guess that is what hurt me. I wasn't thinking right. I just see my mother in-law in need of getting on the potty and wanting to go to bed. I couldn't just do nothing. When husband got home, he felt horrible. He fussed at me for trying to lift her. I am not used to her being here. I didn't know how hard it would be. He got her tended to. That is when I went to take my bath, and you know the rest of the story...
 
I am miserable. Percocet isn't touching this pain. Husband and brother are doing most of the cooking. I am going to make potatoe salad, baked beans and a desert. I can still do it, but it will have to be done sitting down. I think I messed myself up big time. I am scared. I still can't walk well this morning. Each step is pain filled! It is the most horrible pain. I am so tempted to call this get together off. I love my brother. We have been planning this for weeks. He would be so disappointed. I am the only sibling that has anything to do with him. His health is declining. He is diabetic and has horrible neuropathy in his legs. I want to have the get together. He needs to know that he is special to someone...I am hard headed and determined. I can and will do this. I'll just do only what I have to. They can do the rest.Husband is grocery shopping now. He will help me with my stuff too. I told him what happened. He held me while I cried and balled like a baby last night...He feels bad about me hurting myself. He asked his mom before he left if she wanted to go to bed, and ofcourse she said no, she was fine. It isn't her fault or anyone else's but mine. I did this to myself trying to help someone.Clearly, I wasn't thinking. I don't know what to do... If I call the surgeon, he'll be mad at me for doing this. I don't want to go to the ER. I can't afford the copay of $125. I'll just take it as easy as I can. I'll use the heating pad, and the creams I have and just do the best I can do. I don't think I will walk today. I can barely walk from my bed to the bathroom. I have to hold on to my dresser and the wall. I really pulled a good one this time...Ever feel like kicking your own self in the butt? No, I can't do that! It already hurts too bad...
Anice

LLPLUV
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 1158
   Posted 7/4/2009 7:49 AM (GMT -7)   
Anice I'm so sorry you hurt so much the last few days. You've been through enough already. I'm just like you. I plan something I will go through with I would have to be dead not too. But here is what I learned. My husband has taught me so much. Your's sounds like mine. Mine woke me up lastnight cuz I was moaning in pain while I slept. He got up and got my pain medication for me.

The lesson my husband taught me was NEVER do to much. He has learned to cook first time in 18 years so I can rest. I have felt so uncomfortable I sit in the chair or lay in bed and he makes my special food to the detail. He will run back and forth asking what do I do next. Try that today.

You seem to be a caring person I know it would of killed you to let my mother in law be uncomfortable for any amount of time. But you have limitations just like she does. Everyone will understand.

Best wishes on you holiday plans today

Laurie
39 yr young female with,
Chronic Kidney Stones, PKD (Polycystic Kidney Disease), Chronic Kidney Failure, Severe Hypertension, Urological RSD
Also CHF (Congestive Heart Failure) and Sleep Apnea
Hopefully NO MORE........ I think I have it all


Chartreux
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 9622
   Posted 7/4/2009 7:53 AM (GMT -7)   
If your going go thru with this, then send your hubby out and get the ready made potato salad and baked beans
I'm very worried for you at this point and think you should just stay curled up with the heating pad, maybe try ice packs.
and if you get worse, just go to the Hospital! please promise us that! very very worried about you...and your pain
has tears coming from me...
Try to take it easy and rest, lots of prayers and soft hugz....
((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((ANice)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
lots and lots of those soft hugz.....
**********************************************
* Asthma, Allergies, Osteoarthritis, Spinal Stenosis, Degenative Disc, Fibromyalgia, Gerd,
Enlarged Pituitary Gland, Sjogren's and Ocular Migraines

********>^..^<********>^..^<********>^..^<********


merrygirl
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2007
Total Posts : 702
   Posted 7/4/2009 8:52 AM (GMT -7)   
Anice, I am so sorry you hurt so bad. It sounds like you are doing everything you can to help yourself. Just rest a lot in bewteen  cooking and what not. I dont have any supre advice, just wanted you to know how sorry I am and hope it stops ASAP.
 
 
hugs
 
 
 
melissa
Chronic Lyme Disease
Fibromyalgia
Chronic fatigue syndrome
Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome
Sleep Apnea
Hypothyroidism
Adrenal Fatigue
 


edt
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 773
   Posted 7/4/2009 9:24 AM (GMT -7)   

Anice,

I am so so sorry you are hurting so bad!  I can relate to everything you said  I do exactly what you have done over and over again even though I know I shouldn't!  Its our nature!   Ready made Potato Salad can substitute for today...focus on being together with your family...they will understand! Maybe try alternating the Heat and Ice for a few hours sometimes it does work for an acute injury better then just heat!

(((((((((((((((((((((ANICE))))))))))))))))))))

 

XXOO
Patti


PAlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 7/4/2009 11:07 AM (GMT -7)   
Anice,
What I'm going to say please know I say out of love and caring.

I am glad you're scared. You need to be, so you wake up and realize your limits. Whether these limits will be temporary or permanent I don't know. None of us does. But the more you hurt yourself the more you insure you won't heal. You will either make the decision to stop putting everyone else first, and pretending that you can do it all, or you won't. Sure we all overdo at times, but you are recovering from surgery. Please, please, please call your surgeon on Monday and be HONEST because that's the only way he can help you. You have got to stop pretending if you want to heal right.

I hope this isn't too harsh, but you just keep pushing yourself harder and harder, and you see what's happening.

(((((((((Anice)))))))))))

PaLady

straydog
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Feb 2003
Total Posts : 13469
   Posted 7/4/2009 2:50 PM (GMT -7)   

Hi Anice,

I am with PaLady on this one. I too hope you are scared if that is what its going to take to get you to understand the seriousness of your siuation concerning your back. Come on Anice, several attempts of pulling on someone who is dead weight and sometimes you are unable to do 3 small walks a day, I do not get it. Even an eleven year old said don't do it. I have to wonder now how many weeks this may knocked you back in your progress. You were making some progress although you didn't believe it. One step forward and ten back, oh I sure hope not.

Everyone of us here have been guilty of overdoing at some time or another. But we also have to be realistic when it comes to limitations whether they are temporary or permament and accept it and move on.  Yes, many of us have told you that you are overdoing it and and doing too much too soon, these words have come from some that have had back surgery and know what the ins and outs are, the do's and the don't's and you have ignored them.  Barreling thru and totally disregarding your own common sense is heading you straight to big trouble, then you can only blame yourself,  you cannot blame the dr, he did his part. Your dr told you the surgery was a little more involved than he thought it would be, but once  he got in there there was a little more than he had counted on, this is something they cannot foresee until they have you open. That should have been your red flag, you totally ignored it.

Honey, do not just use the heating pad and keep it at 20 minute intervals. Alternate with ice. Try soaking in a warm tub with Epsom salts, it really helps the muscles. No kidding. All we can do here is  try to offe up some things that have helped us along the way.

You need to put the Wonder Woman costume away and save it for Halloween. Be someone that recently had back surgery and needs to slow things down and tone them down. We gotta get you past this somehow. Call your dr if it he get mad at what you did, he needs to know.


Straydog/Susie
Moderator Chronic Pain
 
crohns disease dx 2002 & small bowel resection, still looking for remission whatever that is, chronic pain 22 yrs, added ulcerative colitis 6-05 to the mix, high blood pressure 28 yrs, aortic heart valve insuffiency, depression, osteoarthritis, osteoporosis lumbar spine, scoliosis lumbar spine, peripheral neuropathy hands & feet, COPD & on oxygen therapy, lupus & decreased circulation in both legs. Swveral other health issues just not enough roo to list it all. Too many surgeries to list and too many medications to list. Currently on 16 different daily medications. Intrathecal pain pump implanted June 05.


bluejet2
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2009
Total Posts : 487
   Posted 7/4/2009 3:44 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Anice:
 
I, too, am extremely concerned about you!  I completely understand you feeling like you had to help someone who is helpless - when I had my first back surgery I had a 2 1/2 month old baby and other than having someone tuck him into bed next to me so that I could be close to him - I had to give up total care of him to my husband & oldest son (who was 9 at the time), for 4 months.  I could not pick him up, I could not hold him in my arms, and even after the first 4 months, he had to crawl up into my lap, or someone had to place him in my arms.  It was the hardest thing I ever had to do, especially because he had just recovered from being born addicted to the pain medication I had to take in order to carry him to 7 1/2 months gestation when he had to be taken by C-section because I couldn't walk anymore!  (Obviously, he was a "surprise", I went and had my pre-surgical blood work to have said surgery done and the doc told me he couldn't do the surgery because I was pregnant). 
 
Anice, he was only 12 pounds!  You were trying to pick up a full-grown woman! 
 
I know how badly you want to get better, I can "hear" it in every post you write, but you are expecting too much from yourself, too soon, and as many of us have been telling you, you are getting in the way of your own recovery.  I tell people all of the time that one of the hardest things about living with CP is accepting my limitations,  and I've had back surgery 23 times, so I do understand how hard this has been on you and your family, but I'm afraid that your recovery is being prolonged because of all of the stresses you've had to deal with as well as the physical demands you are putting on yourself.
 
I am going to shut up now, but please know that we are all saying these things out of love and concern for you! 
 
Lorie
 
 

Mrs. Dani
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2009
Total Posts : 2787
   Posted 7/4/2009 5:53 PM (GMT -7)   
   
 
       Dear Anice,
 
     smilewinkgrin So I hear your second Job is Super Woman smilewinkgrin
 
     So, before you kill me hehe. When I have had to pick up dead weight, I use a rolled-up sheet, tied. Wrapp around you, under her arms, then lift her. Use your leggs to lift!!!
 
     I have this tought of your hubby standing over you shaking his finger saying "I told you so!" "Take it easy!"
 
 
*warmest huggs*
 
     If the nausa part continues for 3+ days, gotta get to urgent care. You know the nausa is a signal for 10+pain.
 
*Huggs!*
**More Huggs!**
dani
TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,  
And sorry I could not travel both  
And be one traveler, long I stood


Chartreux
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 9622
   Posted 7/4/2009 9:08 PM (GMT -7)   
Anice, more soft hugz coming your way and sure hope your feeling somewhat better,
hope you got to take it easy today...
(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Anice))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
**********************************************
* Asthma, Allergies, Osteoarthritis, Spinal Stenosis, Degenative Disc, Fibromyalgia, Gerd,
Enlarged Pituitary Gland, Sjogren's and Ocular Migraines

********>^..^<********>^..^<********>^..^<********


anice
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 536
   Posted 7/5/2009 12:05 PM (GMT -7)   
I am in bed today,resting and trying to take it easy today. I have been up for hours but have pretty much stayed in the bed. I have walked through the house a couple times to the bathroom, for coffee,etc. I have been on the heating pad off and on. I am hurting. And yes, I only have myself to blame. I am not placing the blame on anyone else. I did not do this on purpose. I would never knowingly hurt myself. And I don't consider myself to be a wonder woman. My mother in-law needed to go to the bathroom. It was right beside her. My only alternative was to do nothing and let her have an accident on herself. I tried to help her. I will be in her shape one of these days. She needed help. And there was no one else to help but me. She doesn't know that I hurt myself. It wasn't her fault. It was my own. This has been hard on me and I have cried because of her helplessness and b/c of my added pain. It is a little better now, although not a great deal. I will rest today. It is raining outside, so walking is out. I have been walking everyday and doing my exercises. I have been doing the 3 walks. I have not tried to do too much. I did admit when I knew that I did. The pain is bad. It is much worse than before. It is stabbing,stinging, sharp and aches all together. I am upset with myself. But what was I suposed to do? Just say, I know you are tired and need to go to the potty and to bed, but I won't/can't help you. You'll just have to wait? I guess it doesn't matter. What is done is done. I can't unfry an egg. I will keep on doing what I am suposed to do, PT and walking. I go back to the doctor on the 17th. I will ask him to release me to allow me to go back to work at that time. I need to get back to work. I need to go on with my life with whatever the quality of it will be. I have been patient. I have done what I am suposed to do with the exception being trying to help my mother in-law. But, the reality is that I am getting depressed and tired of sitting in this house day after day , after day. I miss working. I think I can go back. I worked all those months before the surgery almost dragging my leg at times due to the nerve pain. And I do know that is probably why the surgery was more than what he thought it would be. I waited too long to do anything about it. It looks like I am going to hurt anyway, even before the incident w/ the mother in-law, I wa hurting still. I may as well go back to work. Atleast I will be making money while hurting. I will use that for my motivation. This doing nothing is almost debilitating me. I am feeling worthless. I do not want to be an invalid. Work was good for me. It helped to know I was doing something. And I loved my job. I miss it. And I want to go back. The pain may get better one day. Or it may always be here. I don't know. Maybe time will help. But I can't just sit in this house waiting for what may not ever be. I will explain my feelings in all honesty to the doctor. I will see what he says. I won't do a AMA(against medical advice). But I do think I need to get back to work. School will be starting back next month, and then we will be getting real busy w/ the back to shcool check ups and all the immunizations being needed. I need to go back to work. I don't want to lose my job. Jobs are hard to come by with the economy being what it is now. And I have been there too long to start over somewhere else.
 
I do appreciate your posts on this. I'll be honest, as I read some of them it made me cry. I guess I was just being overly emotional. I know it wasn't intended to be that way. But it wasn't like I just decided to deliberately do something that would hurt me. And I don't blame anyone but myself for what I did. I wasn't trying to be a wonder woman by any stretch of the imagination. I haven't been ignoring the things I was suposed to do. I have simply been doing the best I can. I do know my own limits. And I have been trying to live  by them. I didn't think I have been doing too much, with that day being the exception. I would do a little and sit down, do a little and sit down. I don't think I have been overdoing it before that happened. I have been going to PT, doing all that has been asked of me to do. Even though I don't think it is helping much, I still go everytime. I am trying to get better. I want to get better.Anyway, I guess I'll get dressed now. My son spent the night with my brother last night. He did the fireworks thing with him. I'll go get him a little later this afternoon.
Anice

Mrs. Dani
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2009
Total Posts : 2787
   Posted 7/5/2009 4:16 PM (GMT -7)   

    Dear anice,

 

     Well bless your heart. I can see you are very offend by my comment about being super woman. Terribly sorry it offened you. Ill stay clear. Best wishes.

*huggs*

dani


TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,  
And sorry I could not travel both  
And be one traveler, long I stood


Mrs. Dani
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2009
Total Posts : 2787
   Posted 7/5/2009 4:24 PM (GMT -7)   
  
 
 
     I don't see an address listed for you. Cant send you an apology card. guess this will have  to do.
 
*huggs*
dani
TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,  
And sorry I could not travel both  
And be one traveler, long I stood


skeye
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 2976
   Posted 7/5/2009 5:06 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Anice,

I'm sorry to hear that you overdid it! Sometimes it is hard to know what is too much until you reach that level. I'm terribly sorry that you have to pay the price for it! If you're not feeling much better by tomorrow, I'd definitely touch base with your surgeon, just to be sure you didn't do any real damage. I hope you are feeling better tonight! I've been having a real lousy weekend too! ((((((((((Anice))))))))))).

hugs,
Skeye

bluejet2
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2009
Total Posts : 487
   Posted 7/5/2009 5:11 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Anice:

I am very sorry if what I said offended you, it honestly was not meant to and I didn't mean to make you cry. As I said, it is very obvious that you want to get better, and we want you to get better. Your post made me very scared for you - and what I wrote was my initial reaction. I understand that you felt that you had to help your Mother-in-law, I wish that you hadn't been put in the situation in the first place, but like you said "You can't unfry an egg"!!!

We all love you Anice!!!

Lorie

PAlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 7/5/2009 5:13 PM (GMT -7)   
Anice,
I'm not going to say much more. There's really not much to say. It seems you have your mind set and I hope everything goes as you want it to.

I don't think you deliberately tried to hurt yourself, but I thinik you're in a bit of denial about your limitations. Yet, you have had improvement from what one of your other posts said. And that is important. It just isn't coming as fast as you want.

I wish you would be willing to see a pain psychologist to help support you through this time, so that you can have the best outcome possible. That's all I or any of us here want for you.

(((((((((Anice)))))))))

PaLady

anice
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 536
   Posted 7/5/2009 7:40 PM (GMT -7)   
I apologize. No, I wasn't offended. And no apologies are needed from anyone. You were all trying to help me to see what I myself did. I admit I was wrong. I think I was overly sensitive and I just cried. It is okay. I came to you all and vented. I guess I kind of asked for it. No hard feelings from me toward anyone...
anice

straydog
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Feb 2003
Total Posts : 13469
   Posted 7/6/2009 4:38 AM (GMT -7)   

Anice,

I can assure you none of us here ever wanted to quit or lose our jobs because of our health issues. We made much more money working than we can possbily can ever receive from any type of disability benefit. Not only was monetary issues  involved, but feeling like an active member of society, being a productive person and above all feeling normal.  As strange as it may sound I still pray to have my health returned to me, I don't think I am alone when I make that statement either.

I know you felt we were being hard on you-we probably were but only in a sense of trying to get your attention. Whether you want to admit it or not you have made improvements since surgery. The old pain is gone, that is a wonderful improvement in itself and that should have told you something. You are building more and more strength as every day passes. When it comes to surgery there never is a quick fix. Perhaps this has been your first surgery and you did not know what to expect, I am not sure.

I have watched you go from an upbeat person who was going to have her surgery and do well, to someone that seems to be thinking she is not really going to get any better and you are spending too much time thinking that way. That kind of thinking will hand you nothing but trouble. You are letting the bumps in the road have way to much importance. You were somewhat hesitant when you were put in PT, it showed in your posts.  PaLady and many others have explained the importance of rehab after back surgery. It is just as critical as the surgery itself.  You cannot allow denial to take over with your health. You are a nurse you should know these things.

I do know you love your job but trying to go back too soon and then not being able to handle it could hand you more trouble than you think. Your employer will expect you to be able to do your job when you return. If you go back and are unable to do the job, the employer may look at you in a different light. Need to think about that.

I have thought much about the new pain you are having. I am wondering if alot of this is more of a structure type problem left over from pre-surgery days. Meaning how you walked and carried yourself when you were in such bad shape before surgery. If you think about it, you were not walking or even carrying your weight correctly where it would be distributed evenly all over. Now, that pain is gone your body is re-adjusting to a correct posture and  distribution of weight. Think about it. Its a thought, have seen it before. Kind of like injuring a knee and over working the good knee type of thing. This is where your PT will pay off.

Everyone here wants you to be well and be able to return to work.  But trying to force the issue when you are not ready physically is not a good thing.


Straydog/Susie
Moderator Chronic Pain
 
crohns disease dx 2002 & small bowel resection, still looking for remission whatever that is, chronic pain 22 yrs, added ulcerative colitis 6-05 to the mix, high blood pressure 28 yrs, aortic heart valve insuffiency, depression, osteoarthritis, osteoporosis lumbar spine, scoliosis lumbar spine, peripheral neuropathy hands & feet, COPD & on oxygen therapy, lupus & decreased circulation in both legs. Swveral other health issues just not enough roo to list it all. Too many surgeries to list and too many medications to list. Currently on 16 different daily medications. Intrathecal pain pump implanted June 05.


Mrs. Dani
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2009
Total Posts : 2787
   Posted 7/6/2009 10:03 AM (GMT -7)   
 
 
     Dear Anice,
     I have to get going, but I just wanted you to know your in my heart and prayers. I hope youa re doing atleast a little bit better. And OF COURSE I apologize. Your the sweetst woman ive met in ages, and owuldnt never want to do anything that would hurt you or your feelings in anyway. Just love you to pieces! You make this life with pain and little less painfull.. if that makes sense. Okay really need to get going.
 *WARMEST HUGGS*
dani
TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,  
And sorry I could not travel both  
And be one traveler, long I stood


anice
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 536
   Posted 7/6/2009 2:36 PM (GMT -7)   
Susie, Thank you for replying. I read your post. And I appreciate it alot. I was getting a little better. But I was in pain everyday. I know that is to be expected. And the right side is better than it was. That is improvement. I am thinking the majority of this is nerve pain. It is deep,stinging,stabbing etc... I am a little better than I first was after the mother in-law incident. It is not alot worse than it was before I did it. But I still hurt pretty bad... I am trying to think positive. It is hard. You all know too well how I am feeling.I was hesitant of PT because I had never had it before. I heard that they push you too hard and hurt you worse than you were before. That is why I was hesitant. I have been going twice a week. I haven't missed an appt. and do not intend to. I am going to stick with it. I do have hope left that maybe there is a small thread that I will get better. Maybe it isn't as much as I should have, but it is what is there now. I still have some hope. I know I am appearing to lean toward the negative side,again. I am working on that. I don't like the person I have become. I used to be happy. I used to be alot of things that I'm not anymore. But I am aware of it. And I am trying to work hard on it. I know that attitude has alot to do with recovery. And I will continue to keep pushing forward each and everyday. I will never give up all hope. I will fight to recover with everything I have in me. That is what I need to concentrate on the hardest. I know this. Thank you for caring enough to set me "straight" when I needed it. I know that no one meant anything unkind to me. I was just overly sensitive...imagine that... And no, this was my only surgery besides 2 c-sections which I see now were a piece of cake. I honestly had no clue as to what I was getting myself into... I knew it wouldn't be "fun" but I had no idea this much pain would be involved. I do not really know why I hurt where I hurt and why I still hurt. All the dr says is that it was more than he thought it would be. It is my lower back,hip and buttocks. And since it is pretty much to the left side now, maybe it is b/c it is the nerve that hasn't healed. Who knows?

Dani, You are a sweetie. I appreciate you responding too. Again you didn't need to apoligize. You did nothing wrong. I took it all the wrong way. I was overly sensitive. All you all were doing were being my friends,true friends. No hard feelings of any kind towards any one!! pinkie promise. Thank you for the sweet things you said. I think you are pretty great too. I love your youth and innocence. It is refreshing-like a breath of fresh air.

I need to go get my son. He spent the last 2 nights with my big brother. It is about a 35-45 min. drive one way. I have directions. But I am not real fimiliar with where I am going! scarey thought!!lol I'll be fine. I have my cell phone incase I get too lost. I have the worse sense of direction of any one I knnow. It sure isn't one of my strong points. I need to go now. I didn't sleep at all last night. And I only had about 1 hour all day. So I am tired. I'll get a big cup of coffee and head out. I just made a fresh pot. I did PT today. And ofcourse, on those days,my pain level is increased. But I will keep on doing it. One day, I hope it pays off. I hope everyone has a good afternoon and night. I am not cooking. I think I'll get a couple of store bought pizzas on the way home. I plan for a early night to bed, if I can.
Anice

straydog
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Feb 2003
Total Posts : 13469
   Posted 7/6/2009 10:47 PM (GMT -7)   

Anice,

You are so right those two C-sections were a piece of cake compared to this back surgery,lol.  Back surgery is such a tough cookie to recuperate from. Its like its a hurry up and get there to have the surgery, but the complete healing process can be such a long one. Its a shame that some drs will not sit down and actually talk to a patient and explain the recovery process. I also know if they were really honest and gave the estimated time frame to recover enough to return to work -most people would decline surgery because of the economics involved. Who wants to be told when they are having a lumbar fusion it will take a minimum of a year for the fusion to heal-I said fusion not the patient. Thats why it is easier for these drs to talk text book language. By doing so-they have covered themselves liability wise.

By having a little higher pain level on the days you attend PT indicates you are getting somewhere. You cannot believe the muscle tone you have lost since being off of work due to this surgery and your PT will help get that strength back properly. There are good therapist and there are bad ones true. But as a patient we have the right to either change or ask for a different therapist.

If its a nerve involved then you know nothing but time can heal a nerve. Someone had posted not long ago that they were 2 1/2 yrs post-op lumbar fusion and they were just finally have decreased nerve pain=I know tha gave PaLady some hope.

Something else you need to think about when returning to work. Even the very best employers can get an attitude when an employee is off of work, its just a given. Meaning when you do return to work, you need to be able to return to work and do your normal job. I think if you push returning to work too soon, then if you get there and you are not able to handle the work and need to go back off of work-the employer may look at you in a totally different  light. The employer may look at you as a liability versus an employ. Thats why its important that once released you will be handle your job.

Get that old fight back in you, think about how bad it ws right before surgery when you were hanging on by a thread. If depression is playing a role hereand I think it is, then get on an antidepressant to help smooth out the rough edges. If you are already on one, then its not working too good for you and you need a different one. Depression can and has ruined lives remember that. Don't become a victim of it. 

Remember above all you will get past all of this. One day you will look back and think-boy what was I thinking,lol.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                        


Straydog/Susie
Moderator Chronic Pain
 
crohns disease dx 2002 & small bowel resection, still looking for remission whatever that is, chronic pain 22 yrs, added ulcerative colitis 6-05 to the mix, high blood pressure 28 yrs, aortic heart valve insuffiency, depression, osteoarthritis, osteoporosis lumbar spine, scoliosis lumbar spine, peripheral neuropathy hands & feet, COPD & on oxygen therapy, lupus & decreased circulation in both legs. Swveral other health issues just not enough roo to list it all. Too many surgeries to list and too many medications to list. Currently on 16 different daily medications. Intrathecal pain pump implanted June 05.


PAlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 7/7/2009 12:42 AM (GMT -7)   
Anice,
Susie once again is giving you some good info. Definitely look into an anti-depressant if you're not on one;
and remember they take several weeks to reach full effect. If you are on one you may need a dosage adjustment
or as Susie says maybe another one. Anti-depressants can also help with anxiety and I think both depression and
anxiety are making things more difficult for you. I'm on an anti-depressant, and I can remember how much better
my thinking got as compared to before I went on it. I had been having all these depressing thoughts, feeling hopeless
and that things were never going to get better. I still feel like that some days, but my mood isn't down in that pit
like it used to be - at least not for very long.

On an unrelated note, this thread got quirky again! At least for me, the posts are spread out long again.

((((((((((Anice)))))))))))

PaLady
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