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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 9090
   Posted 7/18/2009 2:24 AM (GMT -6)   
Most of us had siblings growing up. There's all kinds of theories and talk about 'birth order' and how it affects the children later in life. Where did you place in your family order and do you think it had any impact on you?

Both my brother and I were adopted. I'm not sure about him but I was given up before I was even born. Most likely he was too. He was 5 months old when adopted and I was 3 months...he's about 3 years older than I am. From what I'm told, the day they brought me home was one of the worst days of his life. shocked Geee!! I thought it more like he was lucky to be in my There was just the 2 of us and he never did fell like a sibling to me. Sort of felt like I was an only child. But I don't feel it did me any harm to be the youngest. The only impact on my life was when I had kids of my own. Since my brother had a mean streak and made sure I knew it, I was determined that my own children would never treat each other like my brother treated me. No physical or verbal fighting. They were free to disagree but our home was NOT a boxing I'm sure they thought I was nuts when they were younger, but now they are close and care deeply about each other. In a way my birth order turned into a bonus for me.

How about you?? WHat is your birth order and if you're an only child then how did that impact your life?

Co-Moderator Fibromyalgia & Chronic Pain Forums ~~~
Fibromyalgia, Ulcerative Colitis, Insulin dependent diabetic, PTSD, dermatitis herpetiformus, osteoarthritis, collapsed disk, and a few other side dishes.


If you ask what is the single most important key to longevity, I would have to say it is avoiding worry, stress and tension. And if you didn't ask me, I'd still have to say it.
George Burns

Veteran Member

Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 7/18/2009 2:49 AM (GMT -6)   
Well, I am an only child and also adopted! I was adopted when I was an infant, also. I remember when I was younger practically begging my parents to go get another brother or sister for me, but they never were interested in that. I had a cousin who was also an only child and the same age and we lived next door to eachother, so we grew up like sisters. In retrospect I would have liked to have had a sibling. I think I learned to be very independent and confident - but that doesn't always serve you well when things hit (like these health issues) that are bigger than what I alone can manage. So it's had positive effects, and a downside, just like everything in life.

Funny thing I met my birth mother and she never had any other children. I was 32 when I met her, and she sort of wanted to act like a mother, when my "adopted" mother and father were my "real" parents. I never thought otherwise. And someone my birth mother never understood that, and I think it's because she had no other children. We don't have much contact, which is fine with me. She really doesn't know me or understand me.

Didn't mean to get off on that tangent! But the interesting thing is the girl (now woman) who I grew up with who was like a sister - well, like what often happens to real siblings we haven't had much contact in recent years. Sort of had a falling out and I tried to reach out to her but she's never responded. I still talk with her 90 year old mother at Christmas - who told me she doesn't take a single medication! I'm so envious!!

But I have two cousins - one slightly older and the other slightly younger (the pharmacist I always talk about) and we look alike so people who just meet us often think we're sisters.

Wow - I went all over the place!


Forum Moderator

Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 3452
   Posted 7/18/2009 10:04 AM (GMT -6)   
I have an older brother who is developmentally disabled.  He does live independently but with lots of support.  I have a younger brother and a younger sister.  Both my younger sibs are adopted.  Since I was "normal"  I was treated as the oldest sibling.  I loved my brothers growing up.  We played and played together.  I loved my sister but hated her!!!  hahahaha.  We fought like cats and dogs until I was 17 and she was 12.  I started to tolerate her.  I think all our issues were me as we grew up.  She adored me but I couldn't hang with a sister 5 years younger!!!
I love my bros but we only talk occasionally (once a month?) and at holidays.  I LOVE my sister and we talk constantly.  I live a half hour from her.  She is like my best friend.  We stair stepped our kids accidentally.  And despite her being younger, she beat me at having kids.  She had Joe then I had Jim.  Then she had Jacob and I had Ted.  Then she ended by having Jonah.  All J names cept for poor Ted (edward).  His cousins call him Jed.  All five boys are best friends and never fight but can find trouble!!!  They are aged 15 - 11.  My sister and I couldn't be closer and I never think about that fact that she is adopted!!  She is MY sister in the most bonded and loving way. 
I am totally blessed by my family.  Thank you Chutz for reminding me!!  It is so nice to think of these blessings!!  I know I don't post often here but I do completely love Koffee Klatch time. 
Gretchen  ~  diagnosed with MS July 2006
I have no lesions on my soul and so I will live with no limits.

Veteran Member

Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 9607
   Posted 7/18/2009 10:24 AM (GMT -6)   
My older brother is 2 yrs older than me, My younger brother's (Twins) are about 4 1/2 yrs younger than
me, so I consider myself the middle child and only girl, the being beating up was no fun, I'm
not close to any of my brothers...I'm the fartherest away and want to keep it that way...They never
invite me to anything, just get ordered about ...Family is so over rated....y'all know me better than they do....

If my ears don't pop by monday I'm going to the doctor, it's hard not being able to hear, any advise????
* Asthma, Allergies, Osteoarthritis, Spinal Stenosis, Degenative Disc, Fibromyalgia, Gerd,
Enlarged Pituitary Gland, Sjogren's and Ocular Migraines


Veteran Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 1158
   Posted 7/18/2009 10:57 AM (GMT -6)   
Chart all I can say is enjoy the I have three almost adult children so its always noisy around here. Quiet is an expensive luzury around here..

I am the youngest of two girls. My sister is only 1.5 yrs older then I. We are very close now but it took years to get to that point. We are SO different. We work for the same company doing almost the same thing. She has MS and CP and I have PKD and CP. So we understand eachother alot.

Growing up we hated eachother. She had different friends and hated me for going to her senior prom. My boyfriend was a senior. But then we were only one grade apart. If I went to a party she ended up at it so we drove eachother crazy....

Now I have three children and the oldest has mental issues so my daughter who is 16 is acually the oldest. Then my son who is 15 same age difference my sister and I are. And yes they fight all the time!!!!!

Kidney Diseases and Disorders
39 yr young female with,
Chronic Kidney Stones, PKD (Polycystic Kidney Disease), Chronic Kidney Failure, Severe Hypertension, Urological RSD

Also CHF (Congestive Heart Failure) and Sleep Apnea

Hopefully NO MORE........ I think I have it all

Veteran Member

Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 2976
   Posted 7/18/2009 9:45 PM (GMT -6)   
I have a sister who is 2 years older than me. I adored her when I was younger. I always wanted to do everything that she did. We were very very close growing up, but things changed when she went off to college. She changed a lot, and now we have grown apart. We can still have a lot of fun together, especially if we are on a family vacation or something & there are no other friends around, but a lot of times I feel like I don't know her anymore. She hardly ever calls me, or returns my calls, and even though she is living home at the moment, I hardly ever see her. I'm worried that when she moves out (probably within the next several months) I will "loose my sister." I often wish that things could return to the way they were. I miss our friendship a lot.

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