Trying to make lemonade

New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
[ << Previous Thread | Next Thread >> ]

infinite
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 84
   Posted 7/29/2009 6:59 PM (GMT -7)   
Good evening to all my understanding friends.  I chose this subject, because of the way I feel lemons have been coming my way, and I am really, really trying to do my best to handle them. 
 
This week has been mediocre on the pain front, but I see the PM Dr. tomorrow morning.  I have learned so many things from you all here and I aim to be ready to push this guys buttons if need be with my new found knowledge. 
 
However, any meds or treatments I don't think can help the sadness I have been trying to deal with this week (that on top of the "normal" frustration).  A very good, long time friend of mine lost an 18 year old niece and a 20 year old nephew in a car/train collision Sunday morning. I am pretty sure I remember the girl since she was in diapers, and the boy since he was knee high.  Not as close with her brother and the kids as I am with her and her kids, but it is still a tradgedy none the less.  I have been speaking to her fiancee (who has become a very good friend since we met when they were dating) during the week, and left him another message this evening.  As I told him, I felt it best to let her be with family and help her brother out and when the time came to lean on friends, I would be here.  Well, it wasn't him that called back, it was her - that was an extremely difficult, yet very comforting call, and I could tell that she appreciated it (even though she called me!) as she knew I had been checking in
 
Friday is not going to be an easy day to say the least, as the funeral for them and a third boy in the car is that morning. A 4th boy is still in the hospital - how he survived is what has to be considered a miracle. 
 
I hate to bring a real downer of a story to the board, but I had to type this out to get some real understanding and to let it flow out of my fingertips.  I am not what would be called a religious man, I believe, but haven't ever really wanted to understand it or deal with it any further than that.  So, I would appreciate it if those of you that are more apt to prayer, please include my friend, her brother, his only surviving son (he was not in the car), and their extended families in them.  Right now, knowing they are thought of and prayed for is a lot more important to me than any physical pain, discomfort, or frustration I am feeling.
 
Thank you all -
 
N8

Mrs. Dani
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2009
Total Posts : 2787
   Posted 7/29/2009 7:26 PM (GMT -7)   
 
 
Dear Nate,
 
*warm huggs!*
     I am very sorry to hear of your loss. You must be exhausted right now. If there is anything we can do, please tell us. You are all in our hearts and prayers.
 
*huggs*
dani
TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,  
And sorry I could not travel both  
And be one traveler, long I stood


skeye
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 2976
   Posted 7/29/2009 7:40 PM (GMT -7)   
Infinite,

I am so sorry for your loss, and your friends' loss! What a terrible, tragic story! Any loss is devastating, but this one, especially so. My thoughts & prayers will be with you & the family of these kids, as well as the survivor of the crash. Feel free to lean on us for support any time.

I hope all goes well with the doctor tomorrow.

hugs,
Skeye

Gretchen1
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 3459
   Posted 7/29/2009 7:45 PM (GMT -7)   
oh N8!
 
I am so sorry!  What a tragic horrible story.  I can't imagine losing a child.  I am praying for you and them.  Hang in there friend.
Gretchen  ~  diagnosed with MS July 2006
 
I have no lesions on my soul and so I will live with no limits.


Blessedx8
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2008
Total Posts : 3193
   Posted 7/29/2009 8:19 PM (GMT -7)   
N8...

I just wanted to say that I will include you/them in my prayers. I can't imagine, literally.

I hope things go well for you tomorrow at your PM appointment.

Thinking of you...
Tina
I'm a Christian wife and mom to six boys, ages 5, 8, 10, 11, 13 and 14... I've been ill/disabled since my last child was born in 2004...

Chronic Pain Issues: Severe neck/back pain; chronic migraines; carpal tunnel syndrome; widespread joint/muscle pain, burning nerve pain in hands, arms, feet
Diagnosed with: POTS/dysautonomia (heart condition, nervous system disorder that has my whole body out of whack: heart rate, breathing, pain issues, body temperature issues, etc); CFS/Fibromyalgia; Severe Hypertension; Hypothyroidism; Addison's Disease; Central Sleep Apnea etc etc
Meds: MS Contin (480mg daily); MSIR (15mg/6x day); Soma (3x day); Atenolol; Midodrine; Phenergan; Effexor and on the list goes...
Past Meds: I've been on every pain med there is... Oxys, Dilaudid, Duragesic patches, Actiq, Fentora, Methadone and so on... I've also tried almost every muscle relaxer, nerve meds, sleep meds, etc.
Future Plans: Intrathecal Pain Pump; already completed trial; awaiting my decision for implantation


infinite
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 84
   Posted 7/29/2009 8:29 PM (GMT -7)   
Thank you all for your replies so far. I really do appreciate all the kind words. I am trying to think of how to put this into words yet. I know I stumbled through the conversation I had with my friend earlier - it is difficult to deal with what those of us that are members here deal with daily, but it really hurt to hear her in so much anguish and so drained.

I will follow up tomorrow after the PM appt, so hope I can bring some sunshine here :) I also plan on being in chat tomorrow nite. I hope to see you all there!

N8

White Beard
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Feb 2009
Total Posts : 3611
   Posted 7/29/2009 8:52 PM (GMT -7)   
infinite

I will say a prayer for your friends, I do understand your grief, please take care of yourself, and I wish you well on your appointment tomorrow!

White Beard
Moderator Chronic Pain
 
I'm Retired USAF, went back to school and became an RN, and now am on full disalbility!--Degenerative Disc (affecting mostly the thorasic disc but all levels involved), C6/7 laminectomy/diskectomy& fusion, Osteoarthritis, Ulcerative colitis, Chronic Pain, Fibromyalgia, Complex Sleep Apnea, and host of other things to spice up my life!(NOT!) Medications: Oxycontin, Percocet, Baclofen, Sulfasalazine, Metoprolol, Folic Acid, Supplemental O2 at 3lpm with VPAP Adapt SV


PAlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 7/29/2009 10:11 PM (GMT -7)   
Infinite,
Healing thoughts are being sent your way, and to all of those affected.

PaLady

straydog
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Feb 2003
Total Posts : 13469
   Posted 7/30/2009 6:56 AM (GMT -7)   
N8 you and the familes are in my prayers. Indeed a very tragic event. I do hope your appt goes well with the PM dr as you have been suffering way too long. Please continue to come here and let your thoughts out every little bit helps.
Straydog/Susie
Moderator Chronic Pain
 
crohns disease dx 2002 & small bowel resection, still looking for remission whatever that is, chronic pain 22 yrs, added ulcerative colitis 6-05 to the mix, high blood pressure 28 yrs, aortic heart valve insuffiency, depression, osteoarthritis, osteoporosis lumbar spine, scoliosis lumbar spine, peripheral neuropathy hands & feet, COPD & on oxygen therapy, lupus & decreased circulation in both legs. Several other health issues just not enough room to list it all. Too many surgeries to list and too many medications to list. Currently on 16 different daily medications. Intrathecal pain pump implanted June 05.


Chartreux
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2006
Total Posts : 9622
   Posted 7/30/2009 8:04 AM (GMT -7)   
So very very sorry in your loss and you and the families will be in my Prayers..
you have my heartfelt Sympathies...
Healing and comfort hugz being sent your way..
HUGZ
(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((N8)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
**********************************************
* Asthma, Allergies, Osteoarthritis, Spinal Stenosis, Degenative Disc, Fibromyalgia, Gerd,
Enlarged Pituitary Gland, Sjogren's and Ocular Migraines

********>^..^<********>^..^<********>^..^<********


Gretchen1
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 3459
   Posted 7/30/2009 9:02 AM (GMT -7)   
Hey N8,
 
I am thinking of you and all you and your family must be going through.  Keep us with you.  Let us be a bit of support while you find your way through this.  Love and prayers, friend.
Gretchen  ~  diagnosed with MS July 2006
 
I have no lesions on my soul and so I will live with no limits.


infinite
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 84
   Posted 7/30/2009 9:31 AM (GMT -7)   
Thank you all again for your replies and wonderful words! It is a blessing to know that people I know only through words and a shared understanding of what our lives are like are so caring, and allow me to express emotions here.

On a lighter note, I just got back from the PM Dr., and it wasn't as bad as I was fearing. Once again, they were very attentive and addressed every one of my concerns and thoughts, most of which stemmed from our converdsations here. Anyway, he is bumping the dosage of Lyrica up to 225mg/day in the hopes that this is "ramping down" in his words. He also referred me to a Chiropractor, which I was concerned about with all my back iissues, but he assured me that they arent just back crackers anymore and are able to address pain in a number of ways. It is kinda funny, because my friend (the fiancee mentioned above) has a niece that is a chiropractor and when I was at my friends for the 4th of July, she told me that chiropractors are always last on the list but help the most. Well, I will see just how right she was...

So, the Cliffs notes version is this - bumped the Lyrica dosage, referred to a chiropractor, told to maintain the Wellbutrin, and the Robinul the GI prescribed.

I hope to "see" you all tonight!

N8

Gretchen1
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 3459
   Posted 7/30/2009 9:48 AM (GMT -7)   
Thanks for the up-date, buddy.  Hang in there.
Gretchen  ~  diagnosed with MS July 2006
 
I have no lesions on my soul and so I will live with no limits.


TDoern
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 495
   Posted 7/30/2009 1:05 PM (GMT -7)   
Nate - I just wanted to say that they are in my thoughts and prayers. The best advice I can give is to keep doing what you are, just let them know you are thinking of them, and care about them. Sometimes just knowing someone is there if you need them is worth more than actually using them if you do need them. *hugs* to you as you go through this as well.
"When we come to the edge of the light we know, and are about to step off into the darkness of the unknown, of one thing we can be sure; either God will provide something solid to stand on... or we will be taught to fly.'"

Dx: Degenerative Disc Disease, Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome, IBS-d, Ruptured & Fused L4-L5-S1, Bulging/Ruptured L3-L4, Sciatica, Neuropathy, Costochondritis, Reflux, Gastric Bypass Surgery 12/6/07
Rx: Kadian 50mg - every 12 hours, Percocet 5/325 - up to 4 daily, Baclofen 10mg - 3 daily, Amitriptylene 200mg - at bedtime, Prevacid Solutabs - 1 daily, various vitamins.


LLPLUV
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 1158
   Posted 7/30/2009 3:47 PM (GMT -7)   
Wow you have had one hard week to deal with.

The families of the lost souls will be in my prayers for weeks to come. Such a lose to the world at such young ages......

Laurie
Kidney Diseases and Disorders
              Moderator
 
39 yr young female with,
Chronic Kidney Stones, PKD (Polycystic Kidney Disease), Chronic Kidney Failure, Severe Hypertension, Urological RSD

Also CHF (Congestive Heart Failure) and Sleep Apnea

Hopefully NO MORE........ I think I have it all


infinite
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2009
Total Posts : 84
   Posted 8/1/2009 9:55 PM (GMT -7)   
Once again, thank you all for the kind words and prayers. Yesterday was a very tough day, to say the least. But the turnout and fellowship of the mixed group of people there was really incredible. I headed out on Thursday evening to my friends' place in the country for a chance to help them unwind a bit and just to talk about things face to face. i could tell immediately how difficult the week had already been on them. The service was to begin at 10:30, so I figured if I arrived between 10 and 10:15 I would have plenty of time - boy was I wrong! The church is in a small town, and near downtown, so parking was an adventure. I was amazed by the turnout - how many lives these kids had touched. I am not sure the capacity of the church, but it was standing room only as the service began. The only downside was that the pastor was not very good, and actually forgot the name of one of the kids... That aside, it was a great opportunity for all to remember their lives, and mourn their loss. The most amazing thing I have seen was the length of the funeral procession. The burial was in a cemetarey about 30 miles from the church, and I heard that the line of vehicles stretched over 5 miles long! There is a crest of a hill heading down into the town with the cemetary which is about a mile and a half away from town, and as I began descending that hill I could see the lead car just entering town. Amazing sight. I believe that one of the most amazing, touching, things I saw along the route were the police officers that had their cruisers blocking traffic were ALL holding their service hats over their hearts and their heads were bowed as we all passed by - what an honorable and thoughtful thing to do.

The ceremony at the cemetary was pretty brief, and a luncheon was held at a chuch in the town where they were buried. It was a nice little luncheon and a chance to share memories with all that were there. I picked up my kids as their mom had brought them to the service and ended up heading back to my friends place where our kids had a good time for a few hours after a long day. They asked us to stay around for the night so we did, set up the kids with some movies and us with some movies and carried on much too late! But, I was so glad to be able to be there and be an ear or a shoulder, whichever was needed. I realize the pain and emptiness will be there for them, possibly forever, but I certainly know now how much our friendship means to each of us.

As for why I joined here initially (the pain...), I have to say that I was actually feeling ok up until this afternoon. Even with the sitting in pews, standing at the cemetary, driving all over, and moving around, i didnt have any bad pain. I think everything hit this afternoon. My weekend of lows and highs culminated today with the birthday celebration for my now 7 year old son. We had a good time - but dad finally hit the limit and my side let me know. I am very thankful that it held off as long as it did though, to allow me to be a part of the events of the past few days.

I hope that this post finds you all having a good day/evening. Chat with you soon!

N8

Hound-Dog
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2005
Total Posts : 183
   Posted 8/1/2009 11:24 PM (GMT -7)   
My condolences to you and your friends families.The tragedy of losing ones child or children is the scariest of most parents nightmares,mine included.May God bless you and them thru this dark period.You and they will be in my prayers.

Mrs. Dani
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jun 2009
Total Posts : 2787
   Posted 8/2/2009 9:18 AM (GMT -7)   
 
 
   Dear Nate,
 
     Good morning. *huggs* I am glad to see you have stopped by. I will admitt I had often wondered how you were these last few days.
 
     The ceremony sounds like it was beautiful. A true tribute to them and all the lives they touched. I hope it helped to ease the pain in all of your hearts. Your support must be so important to those around you. You must be very strong person.
 
     7 years old! That is an exciting time for sure! No more training wheels, weekly allowance...wait!  In anycase I know my bumblee bee was very excited for 7yrs old. For her it seemed to mark the beginnig of alot of things! :-)   With school year about to start your son is excited I am sure!
 
     I am glad your body decided to wait! Gets an extra lazy day for good timing!   I am going to try to be lazy myself today. Just basics and maybe work on some jewlery. Things are getting very hecktic with school starting and my week of procedures comming up... I better get a day or two where I can, when I can!
 
     Okay, im gonna stop yapping your eyes off! Have a great day and will catch up with you later
 
*huggs*
  dani
    
TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,  
And sorry I could not travel both  
And be one traveler, long I stood

New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
Forum Information
Currently it is Wednesday, December 07, 2016 1:36 PM (GMT -7)
There are a total of 2,734,222 posts in 301,195 threads.
View Active Threads


Who's Online
This forum has 151319 registered members. Please welcome our newest member, Geezer Jock.
491 Guest(s), 14 Registered Member(s) are currently online.  Details
alephnull, Pirouette, Scaredy Cat, AngelsmamaDorseysdaughter, Hoshie, rocckyd, BillyBob@388, White Bird, pmm73, FL, catti, The king, julymorning, LanieG


Follow HealingWell.com on Facebook  Follow HealingWell.com on Twitter  Follow HealingWell.com on Pinterest
Advertisement
Advertisement

©1996-2016 HealingWell.com LLC  All rights reserved.

Advertise | Privacy Policy & Disclaimer