P.S. On your poll I say both the top one and bottom one you should forgive them, as most people that have not experienced chronic pain have no idea what your going through, that is what makes the people on this forum so understanding, they have and are experiencing severe pain, they don't sympathize with you but they can actually empathize with you, and that makes a world of difference! But I also think you should tell your friends how you feel and how it hurts you when they abandon you. You know maybe they really don't realize that, and if they do then how much of a friend were they really to you? You will find you will have friends here. We all help and support each other.
Post Edited (White Beard) : 9/25/2009 8:31:40 PM (GMT-6)
Welcome to our family!! I really can't add much to what has already been posted! Except you mention that you are seeing a Orthopaedic Surgeon for your problems. I would strongly advise going to a Neurosurgeon for the Cervical (neck) issues!!
Like everyone says unless someone lives in CP they truly cannot relate. Most people (family and friends) are at a loss of what to say or do over our situations. I have found that friends that left when I needed them most did so because they just didn't know how to help! We understand and will be here for you!
Sending you warm hugs from sunny AZ!
I too want to welcome you to Healing Well. Oh, honey, your plate is way overloaded to say the very least. You are so right, you need a break. But, the pregnancy pretty much puts it all on hold. I am just glad you have a dr willing to rx something for pain because many absolutely will not when someone is pregnant because of the addiction issues with the baby when its born. Also, please know they do have to be very careful what they have you on because of the baby.
Many of us have suffered many years with this ugly disease and it all I will tell you is pain is just that pain. It can rule your life if you let it, you can lose friends, your job, financial freedom, dignity, spouses, oh the list can go on & on of what we can get robbed of. Somewhere in the mix of all of this we just have to get a grip on it the best we can. What may work for me may not work for you. We just kind muddle thru all of it together the best we can.
Please know you are not alone and someone is usually around here at all hours of the day/night. Right now I have my days and nights mixed up so I usually am on here in the wee hours when most folks are zzing away lol.
Understand foremost here, the people on this forum that have had surgery, most did not do good for some reason or another, ok. So, don't expect any glowing reports on how well someone did from having surgery. If they had done well, they would not be here. Please keep this in mind. With a good neurosurgeon and a person doing exactly what the dr tells them after surgery you can have a successful surgery. I know you mentioned a neurosurgeon before and an appt with an orthopedic that was canceled. With you being pregnant right now you probably would be just wasting money getting in to seeing one of them. Even if they said ok, lets do surgery, no one will touch you until the baby is born. Since money is an issue I would hold off on an appt with one until the baby is born to save on money. If you have a dr rxing to you now, thats about all that can be done till the baby is born. I would urge you to seek another consult with an excellent neuosurgeon for your neck after the baby is born. I say this because those guys have much more experience with the nerves and such over an orthopedic. Your orthopedics are trained more for bones & joints. This is my own personal preference and I have seen the difference of a neuro & ortho doing neck's and there is a huge difference.
Dear Over The Pain,
Good morning. My name is Dani. It is very nice to meet you. I am very glad you came to the Healing Well Community. I have found this forum to be of great comfort to me, I think you will too.
I would like to start by saying "congratulations on your new marriage and pregnancy!". I know that those two factors alone, can be a tremendous adjustment. I have 2 children and breastfed both. LIterally 2-3yrs before I got "me" back for each child. Pregnancy will make it hard to "aggresivly treat" your pain and spine. That is a long road. I am truly sorry you are forced to "endure" through a majority of it till the childs birth and/or breastfeeding is done. *warm huggs*
I am so very sorry that those you love the most have left and abandoned you. We all have this happen. Why? I do not know. I remember not so long ago when I joined Healing Well, I met a wonderful lady named Gretchen. I remember being oh so sad and mourning the loss of my friends. She said to me," When we become ill a clear line is drawn. That is of a friend and an aquaintance. And help will come from the most unexpected sources, if you let it." It rings so true in my heart to this day. Please, do not dispair. We are here. When ever you need us. How ever long you need us. *warm huggs*
There is a thread about medical resources that began recently. I will try to find it and *bump* it up. Perhaps the resources will help, perhaps not. The adivse you have been given about the complexities surrounding the treatment of nerve pain are correct. It is very diffacult to treat nerve pain, and most medication will do little to no good. A neurologist will be your best option, once you are able to seek the assistance of one.
I saw a pain psychologist for a very long time. When I became ill, and my doctors were frantically (still are) trying to find the casues to the rapidly mounting problems with my body... I became (still am somethimes) very frightened. That is where a pain psychologist comes in. Mine, for instance, helped to "re-define me". We worked on everything. Physical, mental, emotional and social aspects of pain. Cognitive behvaioural therapy ~~> bio feedback. I would not be the "me" I am today without her assistance. If this is an option ( I know you have alot going on and my not even have the time to squeeze in ANOTHER doctor) or an option for your future, I strongly recommend seeing one. It is also my understanding they are a part of most Pain Management Specialists "programms / treatment plans".
You have a tremendondous love for all those around you. And thou you feel alone, please, know that what *I* see in your posts is an increadibly strong, dedicated woman. *warm huggs*
When you have once seen the glow of happiness on the face of a beloved person, you know that a man can have no vocation but to awaken that light on the faces surrounding him. In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. --Albert Camus (1913-1960)