Harper's doing great, me not so much......

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BigLucy
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2007
Total Posts : 413
   Posted 12/22/2009 10:56 PM (GMT -7)   
Harper, my dog (heart disease, degenerative spine-on pain meds now) is happy as a dog rapped up in a fleece blanket next to a fire, which she is as I type this, but enough about her contentment. Me, on the other hand, went back to work (after surgery and months off for recup) and it's kicking my butt. Last week I almost passed out from the pain at one point, but didn't, just threw up instead. The worst is all my co-workers remarking on how terrible I looked (they all know my situation and are supportive, but still). I had one of those weeks where I literally went to work and came home straight to bed to sleep, oh, 14 hours so I could have the energy to do it all over again. Pains less this week, but now I'm going through that depression I get when I suffer many days in a row, BTW does any body else have that? Sometimes I go in these pain cycles where I'll have unbearable pain for many days then it'll ease up and then I get this wave of depression that last for several days--as if I didn't have enough to deal with. Oh well, I'm going to lay down now and attempt to channel Harper's mojo. Arf.

Chutz
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 9090
   Posted 12/22/2009 11:03 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Lucy!

Great to hear from you!! And I must tell you that I am very envious of Mr. Harper...lol Ahhh, the life of a dog. But I do want to send you some bit, gentle hugs!! Going back to work or starting a new job are difficult even if you are healthy. But to do so after your surgery, etc...has to be horrific. I'm sure your coworkers meant well by their comments but down in the gut is still hurts.

I DO know what you mean about the mood thing. I have days when I'm doing 'normal' (whatever that is) then wham-o I'm in a pit somewhere. I do take a lite dose of antidepressant since I'm very sensitive to the stuff but I still waver back and forth. Makes for some added frustration, doesn't it???

Please help refresh what little memory I have...lol...do you have fibromyalgia? The waves of pain, easing up, the another wave is how fibro acts. Not saying you have fibro, just a point of interest.

I do hope Harper is sharing some of those good vibes with you. He at least owes you that much. Even so, having a canine buddy around is the best therapy I know of.

Warm wishes!
Chutz
The three grand essentials of happiness are: something to do, someone to love, and something to hope for. — Alexander Chalmers

(\o/)Co-Moderator Fibromyalgia & Chronic Pain Forums
(/|\)
Fibromyalgia, PTSD, UC, Diabetic on insulin, collapsed disk, arthritis scattered around and a few other delights.


mrsm123
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2007
Total Posts : 1228
   Posted 12/22/2009 11:15 PM (GMT -7)   
Lucy,
I'm sorry that you are going through the pain again by going back to work. Do you have any temporary disability at your job so that you can take a few more weeks off to recover some more? It might help you to go to PT to help build your stamina as well. I don't know what you do for a living but sometimes, we jump back in too fast after being idle for some time and it is difficult for our bodies to acclimate to the increased activity levels.
Sandi
PLIF/TLIF Fusion w/Instrumentation L4-5 Spondololysthesis L4-5.Laminectomies L4-5, foraminal stenosis L3-4, L4-5, L5-S1, herniations L3-4, L4-5, L5-S1, central canal stenosis L3-4, L4-5 and L5-S1
POST OP CES 3/30-06
Neurogenic Bladder and Bowel, bilateral numbness legs and feet
Revision for failed Back surgery, pseudoarthrosis L4-5, hemilaminectomies L3-4, L4-5, L5-S1, bmp added to revision fusion, replaced two bent screws that were reversing out of vertebrae - August 2, 2007
On going back pain and neuropathic pain, failed back surgery, consult for scs, decided not to do that at this point.
Adhesive Arachnoiditis also......just what I didn't need..9/08- adding bilateral ulnar neuropathy with severe compression to the mix. They want me to see a surgeon for ulnar nerve surgery, but I'm not biting.
I've seen enough surgeons over the last few years.
Avascular necrosis of left wrist- maybe hips too


BigLucy
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2007
Total Posts : 413
   Posted 12/22/2009 11:17 PM (GMT -7)   
Thanks Chutz! That's Ms. Harper (after Harper Lee, To Kill a Mockingbird--I'm bit of a book geek). Oh, what don't I have, the list: ulcerative colitis, IBS-D, GERD, fibro, arthritis, well, that's not to bad, but there's always time, I'm relatively young--a little CP chuckle.

BigLucy
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2007
Total Posts : 413
   Posted 12/22/2009 11:24 PM (GMT -7)   
mrsm123 - yeah, I actually took an extra month of medical disability just to play it safe b/c of all my challenges. I'm afraid my problems are ongoing and it is what it is; I can take all the time off I want, but I will always (until there is a cure(s)!) have problems working. Work is very stressful, I think I could do any job and it would be stressful, well, maybe librarian (too late for that career). I work FT b/c I need and want to keep my health benefits and I'm determined to work as long as I can b/c I am fully aware that some day I may not be able to.

PAlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 12/22/2009 11:25 PM (GMT -7)   
Lucy,
I'm having computer problems and it crashes a lot on me, so I haven't even read this thread but I just wanted to send hugs and hope to post this quick. Then I'll go back and read if I don't crash!!

Hugs,

PaLady

PAlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 12/22/2009 11:31 PM (GMT -7)   
Lucy,
I'm going to try another post now that I've read the thread. You know, I think if I tried to go back to work, especially FT, I'd be in about the same physical and emotional place you are - probably worse! I think it takes such a long time to build up the stamina like Chutz said, even if you're healthy. But it's not like you're "just" recovering from a successful surgery, it's all the chronic stuff you've got to manage, including the pain.

I can understand you wanting to push it as long as you can, but maybe you're trying to do too much too soon? Could you pull back to part time for awhile?

And the depression - oh, yea. Without my effexor I'd be having crying jags every day!

Big Hugs!

PaLady

skeye
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2008
Total Posts : 2976
   Posted 12/23/2009 7:41 AM (GMT -7)   
((((((Lucy)))))))). Can you start back working only part time & slowly build up to your normal hours, or be on some kind of restricted duty? I know how hard it is to work when you are in so much pain. Maybe you're just doing too much too soon & slowing it down will help a little.

I think many, if not most of us can relate to the depression. I suffer from it as well & have a really hard time getting a handle on it. I seem to be just as resistant to anti-depressants as I am to pain meds. I'm currently on 3 antidepressants (two of which are maxed out) & it's only just barely making a difference. It's tough because like you implied, the pain makes the depression worse & vice versa. It's a tough cycle to break.

Glad to hear that Harper is doing well! Hopefully you'll follow suit & start feeling better too!

Happy Holidays!

Skeye

BigLucy
Regular Member


Date Joined Mar 2007
Total Posts : 413
   Posted 12/23/2009 9:43 PM (GMT -7)   
Oh, my friends, you don't even know the troubles I'm fighting right now at work. Let's just say some brilliant administrator decided that us employees should work a 10hr/4day week, that's 11 hours at work if you include lunch. Well, I asked my MD to give me a note "restricting" me to an 8/hr day due to a medical condition, now I have to apply for ADA (American's with Disabilities Act) TO WORK AN 8 HOUR DAY! I've filled out papers, have to have meetings to "discuss" if my employer can "accomodate" my needs, yada, yada, yada. I was even told that they might have to move me to another job (something I don't want to do, because I really like what I do and worked hard to get where I am). What I can't believe is that I had to expose my ADA status to be able to work a regular 40 hour week! So, you see, I knew I couldn't ask for any less time/PT work, even with a MD note, because I was already going through this crap. And if they deny my accomodation request I'm going to ask my MD to unrestrict me and will have to work the 11/hr day (probably until I pass out from exhaustion and then I'll claim workman's comp). I've also decided to hire a disability lawyer if needed, a person who's worked where I work says the company always caves if threatened by a law suit--but, jeez, who has the energy for all this. I still can't believe what I have to go through to work an 8 hour day, anyone getting me on that?
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