Venting...I'm sad/angry/frustrated/misterable....

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MsBunky
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2010
Total Posts : 1097
   Posted 5/7/2010 9:38 PM (GMT -7)   
I just need to vent a bit here. I am sick and tired of how my pain and constant exhaustion keep interfering with real life. Dear friends of mine have two daughters, ages 18 and 15. We've seen them grow up, and been part of many special moments in their lives. Today, the oldest girl had the lead role in her school's annual drama presentation. I've had tickets for weeks and have been so excited to see the show.

Well, today was the play and I was so sore and exhausted, I couldn't even get out of bed. My hubby had to help me up to the bathroom - there was no way I could even attempt to attend the play.

IT'S NOT FAIR!!!!!!

There, I've said it. I am so upset I couldn't attend this play to cheer my girls on. I am fed up with how often my health interferes with the things I love. I am generally not a whiner, but I am SOOO over this. It's stupid, I hate hurting, and I've had enough.

I am doing everything I can to be as well as possible - exercising, trying to eat better, taking my vitamins, doing my stretches and other classes. I do feel better most days - at least, I am on medications that help me to feel as well as possible - but there are more "bad" days than good right now and they crop up at the worst times.

Okay...vent is over. I know a lot of people here feel the same way. I just needed to get it off my chest.

hugs to all, and I hope it's a good weekend for everyone, with as little pain as possible.

Pam
Conditions: Fibromyalgia, Chronic Pelvic Pain, Femoralacetabular Impingement (CAM and Pincer), Reynauds, IBS, Interstitial Cystitis, Surgical Adhesions, Ophthalmic Migraines, Severe Hot Flashes (both Surgical Menopause and medication related), plus physically unable to vomit due to the Nissen, and I have extremely tiny veins with a lot of scar tissue...a joy when it comes to having to give blood or get an IV started

Surgeries: Appendix, Uterus, Nissen Fundoplication for GERD, Left Ovary, Gallbladder, Right Ovary, TVT

Medications: Oxycontin, Cesamet, Tramacet, Cymbalta, Flexeril and Clonidine plus Laxaday, Vitamin D and a Multi-Vitamin daily


StephanieJoy
Regular Member


Date Joined May 2010
Total Posts : 40
   Posted 5/7/2010 10:04 PM (GMT -7)   
Pam-

I have chronic pelvic pain too. It's been a complete nightmare. I can totally relate to what you are saying. We just never know how we are going to feel. I've found that I need to take it day by day and sometimes hour by hour. Life can be difficult sometimes and for whatever reason, everyone on this forum has some sort of chronic pain. It is very difficult to deal with not to mention depressing!!!! I'm very sorry that you are going through such a difficult time. You are in my thoughts and prayers. I hope you aren't in as much pain over the weekend.

BIG HUGS TO YOU

Stephanie

momtofourangels
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 2261
   Posted 5/7/2010 10:22 PM (GMT -7)   
Oh Pam, I'm so sorry that you had to miss the play.  It sucks when we have to miss something that's so important to us.  I hope your pain is better this weekend.  ((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))) 
 
Loretta
Dx:  ddd, spinal stenosis, bone spurs, hypothyroidism, typeII diabetes, asthma, allergies, high blood pressure, polycystic ovary syndrome, PTSD, depression, anxiety


Chutz
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 9090
   Posted 5/7/2010 10:24 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Pam!

I'm sure glad you wrote about this. I so agree with you right now. In fact I'll admit that by the time I reached the end of your post I was in tears...still wiping them away. It IS unfair and it frustrates me that I can't seem to do anything about it. The reason I come here and volunteer to help is I want so much to help others but most of the time I can't do near as much as I want to. Shoot...I can't help myself out of fibro pain and there's no hope for it in the near future.

I'm sorry you missed seeing your 'girl' at her play. It breaks your heart I 'm sure. She will understand and I'm sure you will fee l worse about it that she does. Maybe you can take her to lunch one day or have her over to do some 'girl' things together. I'm a firm believer that the most precious gift you can give someone is your time. In the long run it's all we have, isn't it? Sure, we have to work somewhere to get paid but what exactly is that...we exchange our time for money...and some talent too of course. Time is the one and only thing we have in our lives and it is frustrating when pain and sickness limit our preferred use of that most precious time.

If it helps any, please know that many of us do understand how you feel. We understand the frustration, and anger, the sadness. But by coming here we are shouting out loud that we're not going to take it lying down! We're not going to take it alone!!! So hang on, Pam. <extending hand> and we'll make it through this too. You're a beautiful person and the people who truly love you know that.

Warm hugs,
Chutz
Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.
Albert Einstein

(\_/)
(o.o)
(> <) Co-Moderator Fibromyalgia & Chronic Pain Forums
Fibromyalgia, PTSD, UC, Diabetic on insulin, collapsed disk, arthritis scattered around and a few other delights.


PAlady
Veteran Member


Date Joined Nov 2007
Total Posts : 6795
   Posted 5/8/2010 2:43 AM (GMT -7)   
Pam,
Oh, you touched on a nerve for many of us. And I'm glad you wrote about it, although sorry you had to miss your daughter's play. I don't have children, but have a large extended family and have missed more and more family gatherings and special events than I can count. My cousin's daughter was visiting last week with her new baby, and I spent some time with them, and even got down on the floor with the little 5 month old cutie, and sat in a recliner and rocket her to sleep, but had to "pay" for this "huge' activities (I'm being sarcastic here, of course!) for a couple of days afterward, which meant I missed a lot of the weekend family activities. Trade-offs. Constant trade-offs. So I do get your anger about it being so unfair!

Just know you're not alone in how you feel about the limits we have to live with.

PaLady

flower123
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 856
   Posted 5/8/2010 3:30 AM (GMT -7)   
I'm so sorry that you missed the play. I get frustrated too. It's not fair and it's so hard sometimes to feel the way that we do. I'm thinking of you.

Hugs,

Flower

MIKEL99
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2010
Total Posts : 914
   Posted 5/8/2010 5:10 AM (GMT -7)   
Hey Pam girl , sorry you weren't able to attend your daughter's play , that is frustrating I know . You did the right thing venting your feelings , getting it out and moving on .I've no doubt your daughter knows how much you wanted to be there , but please remember its quality not quantity .Now you have the chance to sit with your daughter and have her tell you every detail , have her share her feelings and thoughts with you and you tell her yours ! Theres and opportunity for a wonderful bonding expierence to take place between you two . Theres an opportunity in every situation good or bad ! I hope you two have a great talk together Pam , Enjoy !!! Your Friend Mikel 

Retired Mom
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2010
Total Posts : 1753
   Posted 5/9/2010 7:47 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Pam,

I am so sorry for you and your family. CP can almost ruin the quality of our lives.

I'm sure your daughter will understand, but like the others, I'm sure she will enjoy a celebratory lunch or dinner with you when you are up to it. Children (even teenagers) seem to get it when they see someone in pain.

I missed my daughter's math competition last year (got to go this year) and I understand how you must be feeling right now. I have no doubt that you attend everything you can and with your girls and they know how much you love them.

Please give yourself a break and don't worry about missing this single event. You have wonderful children and are sure to make the next event with bells on.

All my best to you!
Retired Mom

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