Hi Dictionary and Welcome,
Please listen to what the guys have posted here. When you begin to feel the slip creeping back in, come back here and read their posts again.
Although my children are grown and gone from home they worry just the same. We were very active with the kids, going on vacations together even tho grown (Mom & Dad always footed the bill,lol) we took them places they had never been before and such. We did a trendous amt of rving and camping, we were like gypsys on the weekends, lol.
I have been battling cp for yrs but the past five yrs knocked me to the ground and I did good to belly crawl. I ended up having to go on a antidepressant and that was the best thing I could have done. I also saw a very physchologist who dealt with cp and autoimmune diseases. She was realy good for me. Our ins changed and mental health is no longer offered, otherwise I would still be camped at her door every week.
I have to ask if your pain is under control or not. My pain dr says its very important for us to be able to get up and be mobile, not laying in a bed or chair. Once we got my pain under control I was able to get up. I don't enter marathons, but I get up and on days when it creeps in stay in bed, I force myself to get up. I am always better overall when I do.
As far as your boys are concerned, if you have not sat them down and talked about your situation, now is the time to do it, don't delay. They are old enough now to understand what you are teling them. But, they really are owed an explanation, otherwise they may think this is how they are supose to act as an adult. Also, since you don't help your wife, they may grow up thinking they are not suppose to help a woman either.
Try to think of some small things you can do to help get some of the burden off of the wife. Run the dishwasher then un load it, there really are lots of little things around the house you could probably do. Have your wife sort the laundry and try to do a load here & there. The other day it took me 5 hrs to clean a b/r cause I had to keep resting. I felt so good about myself when I finished it too. Any small task I finish is a great mind booster for me.
You hang in there and know you are not alone and we are always here for you. Susie