Ladies, I need some advise!

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chin up
Regular Member

Date Joined Oct 2006
Total Posts : 29
   Posted 10/23/2008 11:38 PM (GMT -6)   
I am in my early 40's and introducing my "medical handicap" (pouch) to a new guy in my life is very challenging when the relationship turns intimate. In coming into a new relationship I still haven't figured out #1 how to tell a guy I have this pouch on my belly with poop in it and #2 how to stop the noise of constant gas (the quiet moments are the worst!) and #3 how to keep from stinking up his bathroom no matter how
much odor drops I use and lastly #4 what to use to cover my pouch or how to keep it from flopping all over during intercourse. Luckily I have had a very understanding ex but now it's time to drop the bomb all over again and it's frightening!!  
crohn's for 22yrs, 5 bowel resections, reaction to remicade.
currently on daily antibiotics, pentasa and prednisone as needed. 

Elite Member

Date Joined Feb 2004
Total Posts : 20553
   Posted Yesterday 12:01 AM (GMT -6)   
Tube tops are a very popular method used for this problem from what I've heard.

My bum is broken....there's a big crack down the middle of it! LOL :)

Veteran Member

Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 1354
   Posted Yesterday 12:17 AM (GMT -6)   
I was going to say tube tops too (I have kept some of my daughters old ones for if/when I might need them). Try posting this on the ostomy board, they might have lots more answers to your questions.
Good luck

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 6927
   Posted Yesterday 5:48 AM (GMT -6)   
they also have those heartshaped covers too. But I would definately ask on the ostomy board.
Forum Co-moderator - Crohn's Disease
...I will find a way, or make one. -Philip Sidney 1554-1586
Make sure your suffering has meaning...
All suggestions/options/opinions are caveated with please consult with your local health care provider...

Veteran Member

Date Joined Mar 2007
Total Posts : 1642
   Posted Yesterday 11:35 AM (GMT -6)   
I have no advise except maybe some fancy nighty top that goes past the pouch...

I just wanted to give some (((((Hugs)))))). I know it must be tough telling someone something like this.

Good luck!


Karen (Karendee)

Diagnosed w/ Crohn’s Disease  March 2007 Started Humira June 2008 (have been on other cd meds)

Diagnosed w/  Fibromyalgia May 2007 on Soma and Lyrica

Diagnosed w/ General Anxiety Disorder in 2005- Effexor and Clonazepam 


New Member

Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 11
   Posted Yesterday 11:58 AM (GMT -6)   

I agree with the tube tops also.  But you also need to tell yourself, if the guy is worth keeping he will matter how embarassing it may be for you.  It's not like you are the only with this going on (i don't mean to sound rude or uncaring either).  I just think that if he cares he will care enough to not let what bothers you about bothering him...get to him.

Good Luck,

Veteran Member

Date Joined May 2005
Total Posts : 4219
   Posted Yesterday 8:36 PM (GMT -6)   
I like the idea of a sexy nighty that is tight (and low cut) on the top but then flares out... I think those are called empire wasted. And just warn him that its there but that he doesn't have to see it. Have you had any issues with hugging or whatever? I don't have a bag so I don't know how obvious they are when hugged.
27 Year old married female law student (last year!!). Diagnosed w/ CD 4 years ago, IBS for over 10 years before that, which was probably the CD. I am sort of lactose intollerant too but can handle anything cultured and do well w/ lactose pills and lactaid. For crohns I am currently on Pentasa 4 pills/4x day and hysociamine prn. I also have bad acid reflux and have been on PPI's since age 13. I have been through prilosec, prevacid, and nexium. Currently I am on Protonix in the morning and Zantac at night. I also take a birth control pill to allow some fun in my life.

chin up
Regular Member

Date Joined Oct 2006
Total Posts : 29
   Posted Yesterday 11:56 PM (GMT -6)   
Thank you girls for your input! Hugging hasn't been a problem it's the part when you have to say "So..I have this thing.."
I really do find some humor in it all and your right Dree it's about whether the guy is worth it all and so far I'm finding that he is. Wish me luck!
crohn's for 22yrs, 5 bowel resections, reaction to remicade.
currently on daily antibiotics, pentasa and prednisone as needed. 

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