Sniper give us a laugh :)

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Chronicallyill
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 195
   Posted 1/7/2009 9:56 PM (GMT -7)   
tell us some more of your "you know you have crohns when"
 
Need some laughs right now
Age:22/6"1'/146lb - Diagnosed: 2001 @ age 15 now 22
First time mom as of March 8th 2008
Past drugs: Pentasa, Flagyl, Budesonide, Prednisone, tons of Antibiotics, Didrocal, 6mp
Past herbal remedies and vitamins:Probiotics, Omega 3&6, Prenatal vitamins, B12, Calcium, iron, vit C, vit D, vit E, Selenium, mineral drops
Current drugs: Valtrex, Methotrexate as of October 2008
Problems:Fissure and Tags on rectum, blood clots, Chronic UTI's, Osteopenia, Ulcers in my decending Colon
No surgeries....yet. Gone through 5 G.I.'s found a 6th G.I. crossing my fingers
Procedures: 4 colonoscopies, 1 upper endoscopy, 2 barium swallows, 1 biopsy of the fissure and tag (chron's affected)


Sniper
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2004
Total Posts : 6518
   Posted 1/7/2009 10:19 PM (GMT -7)   
You may be a crohnie ,,
If you have more meds than Wallgreens
If your wife brings old sheets for the motel when you travel
If you have ever bought defective seconds from a drawers factory
If the bottom of your drawers wears out before the elastic
If your cat has ever tried to bury you in the litter box
If you have ever killed the family parakeet with gas
If you best friend carries a gas mask when you car pool
If you wish you could buy poo colored drawers
If you have ever had to throw your drawers away in the dippy dumpster behind the local Wally World
If we would read the secret history of our enemies,we would find in each mans life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility.


Margie11
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2008
Total Posts : 467
   Posted 1/7/2009 11:53 PM (GMT -7)   
If your adult children find the need to explain to their Father that your attraction to the computer comes from the need to be understood by "Crohnies like us".
 
         THANKS FOR ALL THE LAUGHS, SNIPER!


              Never go faster than your guardian angel can fly!                  
     Be Patient And Tough, Someday This Pain Will Be Useful To You 
 
 Crohn's for life, symptoms included terrible joint and soft tissue pain, just met first cousin who suffers from Reactive Arthritis-explains sooo much. Great control on SCD (when I'm good) and I get by with a lotta help from my friends!
                                                Margie11


provolunteer
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 21
   Posted 1/8/2009 12:03 AM (GMT -7)   

Here's another...

You know you're a Crohnie when......

No matter what building,business,store,restaurant you walk into,you KNOW where the bathroom is.


provolunteer-
27 surgeries, 19 fistulas,c-section, endometrios,hysterectomy,arthritis,dry eyes,migraines,kidneys stones,allergies,chronic broncitis,memory not so good, too close to death several times, too many bowel resections to count,
permanent colostomy(rectum removed was harder to deal with than using a baggie the rest of my life) but.......
...... I am no longer a pain in the butt!!!!!!!!


gachrons
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2007
Total Posts : 4527
   Posted 1/8/2009 4:43 AM (GMT -7)   
When you have breakfast with a bunch of BM oopers that you met on the interpoo box,gotta love it ..lol gail
Hallarious woman over 50 ,CD ,IBS 27 years--resection,fistula's,obstructions,hemmies,and still alive.lol gail


Sniper
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2004
Total Posts : 6518
   Posted 1/8/2009 9:14 AM (GMT -7)   
If you wish LazyBoy made toilets as well as recliners
If you dont need a grab rail by the toilet because your stack of books is high enough to lean on
If you know toilet paper like French chefs know wine
If you wear running shoes because they are needed
If floaters and sinkers are not part of your fishing tackle
If before you drive anywhere you make sure you have a spare tire, spare can of oil and a spare pair of drawers
If you end a phone call with, " I have to go now !" and you really mean it
If we would read the secret history of our enemies,we would find in each mans life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility.


dunny2
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 3200
   Posted 1/8/2009 1:32 PM (GMT -7)   
Your last one is my standard, but I usually put an Oh! in front of I have to go now. Pc's as well as phones.....
Vicky

Too many years with CD
Two bowel resections, several obstructions.
Fibromyalgia and recently diagnosed with chronic pancreatitis and lupus.
B12 Shots bi-weekly

Laughter is the brush that sweeps the cobwebs from our hearts...


dangdonkey
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2009
Total Posts : 22
   Posted 1/8/2009 2:01 PM (GMT -7)   
If you hold your arse more than your spouses hands. turn

DD

Chronicallyill
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 195
   Posted 1/8/2009 5:29 PM (GMT -7)   
thanks sniper REALLY needed a laugh. it's not going so well right now :(.  At the moment I just feel like giving up. SOooooo frustrated.

Age:22/6"1'/146lb - Diagnosed: 2001 @ age 15 now 22
First time mom as of March 8th 2008
Past drugs: Pentasa, Flagyl, Budesonide, Prednisone, tons of Antibiotics, Didrocal, 6mp
Past herbal remedies and vitamins:Probiotics, Omega 3&6, Prenatal vitamins, B12, Calcium, iron, vit C, vit D, vit E, Selenium, mineral drops
Current drugs: Valtrex, Methotrexate as of October 2008
Problems:Fissure and Tags on rectum, blood clots, Chronic UTI's, Osteopenia, Ulcers in my decending Colon
No surgeries....yet. Gone through 5 G.I.'s found a 6th G.I. crossing my fingers
Procedures: 4 colonoscopies, 1 upper endoscopy, 2 barium swallows, 1 biopsy of the fissure and tag (chron's affected)


Sniper
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2004
Total Posts : 6518
   Posted 1/8/2009 5:53 PM (GMT -7)   
Hang in there . I know how bad it can get but hopefully things will turn around for you soon and better times will come. Your in my prayers. If you need a real laugh i could send a picture of me but then, your heart may not be able to handle that so I best stay hidden..
If we would read the secret history of our enemies,we would find in each mans life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility.


Chronicallyill
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 195
   Posted 1/8/2009 6:25 PM (GMT -7)   
thanks sniper.
Age:22/6"1'/146lb - Diagnosed: 2001 @ age 15 now 22
First time mom as of March 8th 2008
Past drugs: Pentasa, Flagyl, Budesonide, Prednisone, tons of Antibiotics, Didrocal, 6mp
Past herbal remedies and vitamins:Probiotics, Omega 3&6, Prenatal vitamins, B12, Calcium, iron, vit C, vit D, vit E, Selenium, mineral drops
Current drugs: Valtrex, Methotrexate as of October 2008
Problems:Fissure and Tags on rectum, blood clots, Chronic UTI's, Osteopenia, Ulcers in my decending Colon
No surgeries....yet. Gone through 5 G.I.'s found a 6th G.I. crossing my fingers
Procedures: 4 colonoscopies, 1 upper endoscopy, 2 barium swallows, 1 biopsy of the fissure and tag (chron's affected)


gachrons
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2007
Total Posts : 4527
   Posted 1/8/2009 6:42 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi What's going on now that things seem not so good. lol gail
Hallarious woman over 50 ,CD ,IBS 27 years--resection,fistula's,obstructions,hemmies,and still alive.lol gail


Chronicallyill
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 195
   Posted 1/9/2009 11:16 AM (GMT -7)   
Well Gail I feel like utter cr*p. I have always been in a flare, but when it gets to the point I can't eat, I am nauseaus, my but hurts so bad from the "dry heaves" as I call it where nothing comes out but you have to go and feels like razor blades, and the pain in my entire abdomen, i just get sick and tired of everything.

I have 2 months before I have to go back to work, my daughter is fighting a really bad chest infection as well as possibly being gluten intolerant, my medicine isn't working and I just can't seem to keep up with my house. All of this is stressing me out hardcore. I only worry like this when I am in a flare. My anxiety is through the roof right now as well. I don't want to ask for antidepressants from my doctor either, but I am in a pretty bad spot at the moment.

I just wish this would all go away. Its been 8 years since I was diagnosed and I still havent gotten one step forward. I am still in the same position as when I was 14. I feel like I will be broken forever and that nothing is going to work. All the drugs in the world arent going to cure this. They will probably end up causing other problems in my body. I already have osteopenia from Prednisone. Yippy :( not. I am on methotrexate and all I worry about now is my liver. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Soooooo frustrated at the moment.

I feel bad for my bf because he is so lost and doesn't know what to do for me.
Age:22/6"1'/146lb - Diagnosed: 2001 @ age 15 now 22
First time mom as of March 8th 2008
Past drugs: Pentasa, Flagyl, Budesonide, Prednisone, tons of Antibiotics, Didrocal, 6mp
Past herbal remedies and vitamins:Probiotics, Omega 3&6, Prenatal vitamins, B12, Calcium, iron, vit C, vit D, vit E, Selenium, mineral drops
Current drugs: Valtrex, Methotrexate as of October 2008
Problems:Fissure and Tags on rectum, blood clots, Chronic UTI's, Osteopenia, Ulcers in my decending Colon
No surgeries....yet. Gone through 5 G.I.'s found a 6th G.I. crossing my fingers
Procedures: 4 colonoscopies, 1 upper endoscopy, 2 barium swallows, 1 biopsy of the fissure and tag (chron's affected)


gachrons
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2007
Total Posts : 4527
   Posted 1/9/2009 11:50 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Does your GI know that you are having so many problems going on ,with all that you have mentioned above? Try not to worry about the house for now when I am sick I just do what I have to. When I had a little one I stayed on the bed and watched kiddie movies or cartoons or played with toys hmm that was a long time ago,at least I could get some body rest.Hope your little one is better soon it wore me out when mine was sick I used to find it tiring.If your in that much distress can you go to emerg. and get something to at least help with your poor bottom area and the heaves.What about those eneama's people use for that ?Also something for naesuea ,gee don't let things get any worse. Sometimes doing something is better then worrying. Glad your boyfriend is there hope he helps but remember it's up to us to go get medical help when things get bad. Stay in touch and maybe it will help with some of your frustrations. lol gail
Hallarious woman over 50 ,CD ,IBS 27 years--resection,fistula's,obstructions,hemmies,and still alive.lol gail


gachrons
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2007
Total Posts : 4527
   Posted 1/9/2009 4:23 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi When you have to explain that you have to poop and you get, well everyone has to poop ,and then you say yes but mine is sitting on my poop hole... what no answer all is quite... lol gail
Hallarious woman over 50 ,CD ,IBS 27 years--resection,fistula's,obstructions,hemmies,and still alive.lol gail


Margie11
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2008
Total Posts : 467
   Posted 1/9/2009 10:25 PM (GMT -7)   

Chronic,
  I hope your small miracle will inspire you to have hope. I have had good luck in the past with Carlson's E-gems suppositories for stabbing burning pains and they help with "dry heaves" of the bum. I use them at night, they are very soothing when I am trying to sleep and having these issues. When I have to stand I use them day time with a panti liner. Sometimes I use Lifetime Calm and Calmer made from green tea for L-theanine and a few herbs, to take the edge off stress. I also use tryptophan (like from turkey) for a mood stabilizer that helps with relaxation and serotonin issues. Just some ideas to try that are not antidepressants. I am blessed with a pharmacist who is quite versed on supplements and nutrition. I hope you do too, it is a real blessing when you use western meds and natural ideas together.


              Never go faster than your guardian angel can fly!                  
     Be Patient And Tough, Someday This Pain Will Be Useful To You 
 
 Crohn's for life, symptoms included terrible joint and soft tissue pain, just met first cousin who suffers from Reactive Arthritis-explains sooo much. Great control on SCD (when I'm good) and I get by with a lotta help from my friends!
                                                Margie11


Sniper
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2004
Total Posts : 6518
   Posted 1/10/2009 10:38 AM (GMT -7)   
I dont worry about my liver. Most folks would be killing their liver with something else anyway. I dont drink ,,,well not to speak of,,,so I figure what the heck..
If we would read the secret history of our enemies,we would find in each mans life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility.


Margie11
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2008
Total Posts : 467
   Posted 1/11/2009 1:45 AM (GMT -7)   
Sniper and Other Healing Well humorist,

Did you see the " I love this site" post? I just wanted to note that the humor here is as priceless as the suggestions dealing with the more obvious symptoms. I know I've said many times that the mental issues and brain fog are far more challenging for me. I don't do stupid well, and spend much time kicking myself for not being as strong or having the memory I formerly had. You have really helped me learn to laugh at myself.-THANKS SNIPER, VV, GACHRONS, RANDY, and the others who take time here to give us a laugh. It is truly an important part of healing to have a good laugh from the belly. This works regardless of what's inside the belly (or is not). So Sniper, just courious, Did ya ever meet a man you didn't like?


              Never go faster than your guardian angel can fly!                  
     Be Patient And Tough, Someday This Pain Will Be Useful To You 
 
 Crohn's for life, symptoms included terrible joint and soft tissue pain, just met first cousin who suffers from Reactive Arthritis-explains sooo much. Great control on SCD (when I'm good) and I get by with a lotta help from my friends!
                                                Margie11


gachrons
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2007
Total Posts : 4527
   Posted 1/11/2009 6:04 AM (GMT -7)   
Hey Margie I agree fun times help exercise the belly. I bet the only man Sniper didn't like was that dolly VV keeps rolling around hmmm

You know you have crohn's when Dolly takes on a different curve then we get to say Pardon...lol gail
Hallarious woman over 50 ,CD ,IBS 27 years--resection,fistula's,obstructions,hemmies,and still alive.lol gail


Margie11
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2008
Total Posts : 467
   Posted 1/11/2009 9:07 AM (GMT -7)   
If you come here to wait an hour for your meds and vits to absorb, before you have breakfast and coffee... you might be a Crohnie!!!
If you have a roll of paper in the glove box near your insurance and registration papers... you might be a Crohnie!!


              Never go faster than your guardian angel can fly!                  
     Be Patient And Tough, Someday This Pain Will Be Useful To You 
 
 Crohn's for life, symptoms included terrible joint and soft tissue pain, just met first cousin who suffers from Reactive Arthritis-explains sooo much. Great control on SCD (when I'm good) and I get by with a lotta help from my friends!
                                                Margie11

Post Edited (Margie11) : 1/11/2009 9:10:17 AM (GMT-7)


Chronicallyill
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 195
   Posted 1/11/2009 2:38 PM (GMT -7)   
Hey Gail, My doctor doesnt know anything that is going on because I havent seen him since September.  I did have an appointment with him in December, but he had a family emergency and had to fly back to England. So I am waiting till the 13th to see him again. He wants me to go on a diet that would cost me 3400 dollars. All liquid. I refuse because I can't afford it. I saw a dietician and we talked about ensure instead, but then she emailed and said the doc wanted this special canned nutrtion, nothing else. :( I was recently in the hospital after a colonscopy gone bad. That's when the doctor in the emerg who was seeing me then said my G.I. suggested the predigested diet for 2 months. I looked into and it would have costed 6000 through the pharmacy. So when I had the appointment with the dietician I thought that it would be the ensure which would be less expensive, but not by much. Its cheaper to go through the dieticians for the other supplement. 2600 cheaper but still that is way to much.
 
Been doing ensure today and making me feel a little bit better, but we will see what happens.
Age:22/6"1'/146lb - Diagnosed: 2001 @ age 15 now 22
First time mom as of March 8th 2008
Past drugs: Pentasa, Flagyl, Budesonide, Prednisone, tons of Antibiotics, Didrocal, 6mp
Past herbal remedies and vitamins:Probiotics, Omega 3&6, Prenatal vitamins, B12, Calcium, iron, vit C, vit D, vit E, Selenium, mineral drops
Current drugs: Valtrex, Methotrexate as of October 2008
Problems:Fissure and Tags on rectum, blood clots, Chronic UTI's, Osteopenia, Ulcers in my decending Colon
No surgeries....yet. Gone through 5 G.I.'s found a 6th G.I. crossing my fingers
Procedures: 4 colonoscopies, 1 upper endoscopy, 2 barium swallows, 1 biopsy of the fissure and tag (chron's affected)


Sniper
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2004
Total Posts : 6518
   Posted 1/11/2009 3:23 PM (GMT -7)   
Margie, I have worked for a few I didn't like, but they had no sense of humor. Gail I think VV was shoveling it when he talked about the VooDoo doll ,,,if you know what I mean..
If we would read the secret history of our enemies,we would find in each mans life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility.


Margie11
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2008
Total Posts : 467
   Posted 1/11/2009 3:28 PM (GMT -7)   
Ahhh,
Sniper, I don't think Will Rogers had to work for corporate America in his time.
              Never go faster than your guardian angel can fly!                  
     Be Patient And Tough, Someday This Pain Will Be Useful To You 
 
 Crohn's for life, symptoms included terrible joint and soft tissue pain, just met first cousin who suffers from Reactive Arthritis-explains sooo much. Great control on SCD (when I'm good) and I get by with a lotta help from my friends!
                                                Margie11


FallColors
Veteran Member


Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 1220
   Posted 1/11/2009 3:50 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Chronicallyill,

I hope your doctors appointment on the 13th goes very well and your doc finds a way to pay for what you need!
Diagnosed early 2007 with rectal Crohn's.  Several peri-rectal abscesses and two fistulas with setons.  Allergic to Remicade and Humira.  Currently on 6MP.


Chronicallyill
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 195
   Posted 1/20/2009 11:14 PM (GMT -7)   
Thanks FallColors. My doc appointment went ok. He wants me to start remicade in a few weeks. :( Know nothing about it unfortunately and lately i havent had the concentration to sit down and read. Literally I mean. I can read the same sentence over and over again and still doesnt hit my brain. Dont we all love the nutrient deprived brain memory. Lol.
Age:22/6"1'/146lb - Diagnosed: 2001 @ age 15 now 22
First time mom as of March 8th 2008
Past drugs: Pentasa, Flagyl, Budesonide, Prednisone, tons of Antibiotics, Didrocal, 6mp
Past herbal remedies and vitamins:Probiotics, Omega 3&6, Prenatal vitamins, B12, Calcium, iron, vit C, vit D, vit E, Selenium, mineral drops
Current drugs: Valtrex, Methotrexate as of October 2008
Problems:Fissure and Tags on rectum, blood clots, Chronic UTI's, Osteopenia, Ulcers in my decending Colon
No surgeries....yet. Gone through 5 G.I.'s found a 6th G.I. crossing my fingers
Procedures: 4 colonoscopies, 1 upper endoscopy, 2 barium swallows, 1 biopsy of the fissure and tag (chron's affected)

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