Totally unrelated ?

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dunny2
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 3200
   Posted 12/1/2009 9:30 AM (GMT -7)   
I don't know if any of you have been through this experience, but thought I would ask... Early this year, my son & his family
visited me from England, and right from the get go things seemed strained. I have to admit at the time I was feeling pretty
unwell, and wasn't able to join them with all their outings (which I feel guilty about) Since they've been home, I hear very
little from them and I have the distinct impression, that they feel their vacation was a total waste of time & money.
I was in the hospital the other day, but I still heard nothing from my son. I guess I'm feeling hurt and slighted.
What would you do, if anything?
Vicky

Too many years with CD
Two bowel resections, several obstructions.
Fibromyalgia and recently diagnosed with chronic pancreatitis and lupus.
B12 Shots bi-weekly

Laughter is the brush that sweeps the cobwebs from our hearts...


flowery
Regular Member


Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 440
   Posted 12/1/2009 10:45 AM (GMT -7)   
Sometimes I think this disease is so confusing for those who don't understand it. I have Crohns and it's still confusing to me.
When my kids come home and see me..my spirits are higher and they think I'm fine and they don't understand when I PASS on doing things! Trying to explain....thinkgs like, "I can't go cuz' I might go on the floor, or can't find a bathroom, or I could be really smelly."....etc. One just doens't go into it... talking about "D" just isn't exceptable in the real world!
Even when I get the flu or go into the hospital...some of my family's response it like....oh again!
They think...she'll be patched up and out in no time. Meanwhile, we are drugging through! Everyday! regardless! I think family and even friends just get knumb.....not there fault, just how it is...but that's why this website is so good!
Flowery
 "Get busy living or get busy dying"
               
                         


Nanners
Elite Member


Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 14995
   Posted 12/1/2009 11:48 AM (GMT -7)   
Vicky have you tried to call him and ask him what's up?  Sometimes our family members just don't get or even like to think that their Mom's are not perfect and healthy.  We try to do the best we can, and I do understand what it feels like as a Mom, not to have your kids "really" care about how you are.  I have a selfish 32 year old, that hasn't talked to me since my Mom died earlier this year and it really hurts.  I really think you need to have a candid talk with him.  Tell him you know that it had to be hard for him because you were ill and couldn't enjoy the time with him like you wanted, but it wasn't because you don't care about them, its just that you are very ill right now.  I don't think he is understanding how truly ill you really are.
 
Sending special love and Mom hugs to you!  I do understand, if that helps at all.
 
Hugs
Gail*Nanners* 
Gail*Nanners* Co-Moderator for Crohns Disease and Anxiety/Panic Forum
Crohn's Disease for over 33 years. Currently on Asacol, Prilosec, Estrace, Prinivil, Diltiazem, Percoset prn for pain, Zofran, Phenergan, Probiotics, Calcium  w/Vit D, and Xanax as needed. Resections in 2002 and 2005. Also diagnosed with Fibromyalgia, Osteoarthritis, and Anxiety. Currently my Crohns is in remission, but my joints are going crazy!
It's scary when you start making the same noises As your coffee maker.
*Every tomorrow has two handles.  We can take hold of it by the handle of anxiety, or by the handle of faith"*

dunny2
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 3200
   Posted 12/1/2009 12:15 PM (GMT -7)   
Thanks both of you, especially you Gail. You know talking to him is like pulling teeth, but I could try.
This is eating away at me LOL xx
Vicky

Too many years with CD
Two bowel resections, several obstructions.
Fibromyalgia and recently diagnosed with chronic pancreatitis and lupus.
B12 Shots bi-weekly

Laughter is the brush that sweeps the cobwebs from our hearts...


Nanners
Elite Member


Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 14995
   Posted 12/1/2009 2:45 PM (GMT -7)   
Vicky,

Sometimes our kids really do not appreciate us like they should. I sacrificed so much in my life for my oldest child and the things she is doing now is not only breaking my heart, but her kids hearts too. I hope you and your son will be able to have an honest and open conversation and that things improve for you both. Big Hugs~ Gail
Gail*Nanners* Co-Moderator for Crohns Disease and Anxiety/Panic Forum
Crohn's Disease for over 33 years. Currently on Asacol, Prilosec, Estrace, Prinivil, Diltiazem, Percoset prn for pain, Zofran, Phenergan, Probiotics, Calcium  w/Vit D, and Xanax as needed. Resections in 2002 and 2005. Also diagnosed with Fibromyalgia, Osteoarthritis, and Anxiety. Currently my Crohns is in remission, but my joints are going crazy!
It's scary when you start making the same noises As your coffee maker.
*Every tomorrow has two handles.  We can take hold of it by the handle of anxiety, or by the handle of faith"*
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