X-mass shoping with crohns

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Sniper
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Date Joined Feb 2004
Total Posts : 6518
   Posted 12/17/2009 1:30 PM (GMT -7)   
Tough job , but you have to do it, even after all the procrastinating . So you go and about 20 minutes after you have some lunch your butt sends that urgent message to your brain. Warning , 2 minutes until critical mass,, explosion eminent !!!! Of course the restroom is on the third floor so you scurry through the store looking for the fastest rout,, UP. This is when all the slowest people block the isles. You know the ones , so wrapped up in what they are looking at that their ears shut off. Its , excuse me , excuse me,,,EXCUSE ME !!!!!I dont understand why there are always those two people that stand back to back and stare at opposite shelves , but you make it to the escalator somehow . Thinking you could run up the steps were there not the whole defensive line of the Green Bay Packers blocking you, you stand there , cheeks clinched , saying to your self,,," Go baby,,Go ,,Faster ,,Go Faster." . You know what, the escalator is a cold hearted thing . By the time you reach the third floor, you have to lean on something and grit your teeth clinching as hard as you can yet still trying not to attract attention. The last thing you want is for someone to ask if your OK. Then you would have to change that contorted look on your face into a hal**** smile and lie. " Ohhhhh,, I'm uhhhh, mmmmmm, FINE...Yea right. Finally theres the restroom sign,,written in three languages but not a clue of what direction to take, so there you go weaving in and out of the ladies lingerie displays like you know what your looking for. Then ,,there it is,,,the goal line,,Ohhhhhhhh Boy . You rush in ,,please be an empty stall, please be clean, I dont care if your clean , just be empty..One quick check,,Paper, we have Paper!!!! Ahhhhhhhhhhhh, made it.((( Phaaaaat))). Wahhhhhhhhhh? Thats ittttttttt ? There has to be more than that. It felt like a battleship was on the way . So there you sit wondering if your done or is there something else lurking, just waiting for you to get back down stairs. So you do the paper work, wash your hands ,,nice and clean, grab that filthy germ laden door handle,, the one that always opens , IN. Whats up with that ? Make your way back down,, no one in the way at this time, and just as you find the item you had when the alarm went off,,,,,,,,,,,,,Yep,,,, you guessed it....
If we would read the secret history of our enemies,we would find in each mans life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility.


HabsHockeyFan
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Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 3130
   Posted 12/17/2009 1:56 PM (GMT -7)   
It's a 50/50 split for me with those nasty escalators....trotting up them as stairs can cause more urgency, but waiting for them to climb to the top is excruciating....I know follow my husband theory of Christmas shoping.
We only go to the one mall we have that has bars/restaurants spinkled throughout the path. he always stops for a beer and I stop for the restroom. I think it is one of the few times he likes that I have CD!

ps...never believe the first sound....it is just a test for the next 60 seconds
Dx'd '90 (emergency rupture), symptoms ignored long before that, '03 fistulas and bad flagyl reactions, B12 weekly, Pentasa [until I surrender to the bigger meds]
I'm riding on the escalator of life....


Howlyncat
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Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 12/17/2009 3:51 PM (GMT -7)   
LOL Sniper aint it the truth....many an almost blow out meself ..i very well imagine what ppl are doing or mouthing outside the potty door i am occupying ... i am sure i have taken away many a persons appetite in my time......just where DO you come up with these lfantastic idears for posting ...i know i know..personal experience eh..see i am a smart cookie after all......happy shopping all n butt cheeks tight..luvs lyn
                          
                                Co Mod for Crohns, Anxiety/Panic, Alzheimers
   Crohns..Pyoderma gangrenosum,..Anxiety / panic..Fibromyalgia,,Neuropathy...Deaf...Seizures
 
                        I DONT COMPLAIN...OTHERS ARE WORSE OFF THAN I AM                                   
                                                     .....LYN.......
                                Donate to..www..healingwell.com.
                                                    
                             No BETTER GIFT than FRIENDS N FAMILY                                               
                            Happy Holidays from my home to yours
                              
 


Sniper
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2004
Total Posts : 6518
   Posted 12/18/2009 7:28 AM (GMT -7)   
This happened to me this week. I still dont know why the restrooms are on the third floor and behind ladies undies. Maybe if you dont make it to the restroom its convenient to buy a new pair of drawers. Cant see how one of those thong things would stop much leakage though. Besides cutting your bottom half in two they dont cover much. Ive seen more material in the form of lent in my navel. Or is that naval ? Only if MMMNavy is wearing them I suppose. Still think a big old pair of those grandma drawers would be much more useful in an emergency.
If we would read the secret history of our enemies,we would find in each mans life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility.


Nanners
Elite Member


Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 14995
   Posted 12/18/2009 7:36 AM (GMT -7)   
I swear everytime I go shopping, no matter what time of year, this happens to me. I took a quick break at work the other day to go by some Christmas cards, these weren't the boxed kinds, I was looking for personal cards for those closest to me. I had them all in hand, and then started feeling that familiar cramping. Decided its time to head back to the office, of course there was a long line, I didn't want to put all the cards back and make a run for it, so I waited. Thankfully another register opened and I was able to get out of the store quickly. Then of course I had to walk the equivalent of about 1 1/2 blocks back to the office, while clenching my teeth HARD. Then the elevator took forever to come down, then I work on the 18th floor, so I had to wait for a few people to get off onto their floor, then FINALLY I hit my floor. Ran to the bathroom, praying the whole time no one was in there, luckily for me no one was, and as you said Sniper............Phaaattttt, and then awwwww.

I can't believe how good I have gotten at holding it:)
Gail*Nanners* Co-Moderator for Crohns Disease & Anxiety/Panic
Crohn's Disease for over 34 years. Currently on Asacol, Prilosec, Estrace, Prinivil, Diltiazem, Percoset prn for pain, Zofran, Phenergan, Probiotics, Calcium, Vit D, and Xanax prn. Resections in 2002 & 2005. Also diagnosed w/ Fibromyalgia, Osteoarthritis, & Anxiety. Currently my Crohns is in remission, but my joints are going crazy!
*Every tomorrow has two handles.  We can take hold of it by the handle of anxiety, or by the handle of faith"*

Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 12/18/2009 8:26 AM (GMT -7)   
I for one do not understand the whole idea behind ..tooth floss panties..whats up with them there things..give me granny pants..well at my size its lil girls panties lol..anytime over them..and ya know what else really ticks me off the tooth floss ones cost twice as much as regular panties..less material..more moolah...ahh how i long for the good ole days.....luvs n huggles..lyn
                          
                                Co Mod for Crohns, Anxiety/Panic, Alzheimers
   Crohns..Pyoderma gangrenosum,..Anxiety / panic..Fibromyalgia,,Neuropathy...Deaf...Seizures
 
                        I DONT COMPLAIN...OTHERS ARE WORSE OFF THAN I AM                                   
                                                     .....LYN.......
                                Donate to..www..healingwell.com.
                                                    
                             No BETTER GIFT than FRIENDS N FAMILY                                               
                            Happy Holidays from my home to yours
                              
 


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 12/18/2009 8:30 AM (GMT -7)   
Nanners..me thinks it comes with practice and i AM THINKING we should have our own special category in olympics..what ya think Sniper I know you can very well come up with something for us..luvs lyn
                          
                                Co Mod for Crohns, Anxiety/Panic, Alzheimers
   Crohns..Pyoderma gangrenosum,..Anxiety / panic..Fibromyalgia,,Neuropathy...Deaf...Seizures
 
                        I DONT COMPLAIN...OTHERS ARE WORSE OFF THAN I AM                                   
                                                     .....LYN.......
                                Donate to..www..healingwell.com.
                                                    
                             No BETTER GIFT than FRIENDS N FAMILY                                               
                            Happy Holidays from my home to yours
                              
 


Becky77
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 1768
   Posted 12/18/2009 6:12 PM (GMT -7)   
I made plans (in my mind) to go pick up stocking stuffers for my Mom. I always play "elf" for Dad and fill her stocking. Anyway, I stopped by their house to take inventory of her bathroom and see what she needs, if anything. After a bathroom stop I left on my way to Walmart. Halfway to Walmart my stomach sent warnings....and I decided I'd rather go home than try to shop quickly between bathroom breaks.

So much for getting things done today. Maybe tomorrow. I think I'll take some pain meds when I wake up to slow my stomach down enough to be elf tomorrow.

I would have dinner plans with friends tomorrow, but I don't even want to do that. It's so much easier to stay home and be within feet of a toilet!

Next year I'm planning ahead and doing more of my shopping online!
Becky

31 yr old female-dx with Crohn's in '97 after emergency resection and appendectomy, 2nd resection '05, Bilateral pulmonary emboli 10/09
Currently on Humira, Omeprazole, Effexor, Seroquel, Calcium, Vit D, sublingual B12, Coumadin


Jen77
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2006
Total Posts : 2690
   Posted 12/18/2009 8:02 PM (GMT -7)   
Boy I've been there! Only I think I've made it to the goal line only to find it's a dressing room, not a BATHROOM!
~Jennifer
 
Diagnosed with Crohn's Disease 2/06, and Health Anxiety/OCD 12/08 Taking Asacol, Questran, Toprol XL, and Celexa.


nawlinscate
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 656
   Posted 12/19/2009 7:32 AM (GMT -7)   
My least favorite experience is getting stuck in one store for ninety minutes. You can't leave because, every time you try, you make it either downstairs or to the parking lot and have to turn around and race back in to use the bathroom AGAIN. Or leaving a store, getting in your car, and realizing, by the time you're clearing the parking lot, that the old familiar urgency is back. So you have to quickly calculate: Do I feel like an idiot, drive back into the same parking lot and run back into the store I just left? Or can I grit my teeth, do Lamaze breathing, and make it to the next bathroom along the route? Glad to know I'm not the only one dealing with this experience, over and over again!

dunny2
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 3200
   Posted 12/19/2009 3:55 PM (GMT -7)   
Just did that today, but the restroom was in layaway. Probably should be layaway til your pain subsides, but then we would be laid up!!
Vicky

Too many years with CD
Two bowel resections, several obstructions.
Fibromyalgia and recently diagnosed with chronic pancreatitis and lupus.
B12 Shots bi-weekly

Laughter is the brush that sweeps the cobwebs from our hearts...


Sniper
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2004
Total Posts : 6518
   Posted 12/19/2009 10:56 PM (GMT -7)   
dunny,,,did you run into layaway and tell them you wanted to leave a ,,,package ????Nawinscate,,ever notice that when your trying to get home doing Lamaze breathing, the car you cant pass is the driver that has to be going sooooo slow he can read the paper in the news stand as he rollllllllllls by ???
If we would read the secret history of our enemies,we would find in each mans life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility.


randynoguts
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2003
Total Posts : 6049
   Posted 12/21/2009 12:01 AM (GMT -7)   
sniper et-al; the reason the bathrooms are on the 3 rd floor and all the way in the back is so you wont use them. simple. if they can deter 50% of users they dont have to fix damage as much, supply all the paper products etc... plus and i think the real reason is the video tape all the people clenching butts and doing the squirt scoot on the way there and play 'em at the xmas party!
randynoguts 



     http://www.geocities.com/randynogutsweb/


Howlyncat
Elite Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 12/21/2009 2:09 AM (GMT -7)   
finally it all makes sense ..thanks Randy....luvs n huggles..lyn
                          
                                Co Mod for Crohns, Anxiety/Panic, Alzheimers
   Crohns..Pyoderma gangrenosum,..Anxiety / panic..Fibromyalgia,,Neuropathy...Deaf...Seizures
 
                        I DONT COMPLAIN...OTHERS ARE WORSE OFF THAN I AM                                   
                                                     .....LYN.......
                                Donate to..www..healingwell.com.
                                                    
                             No BETTER GIFT than FRIENDS N FAMILY                                               
                            Happy Holidays from my home to yours
                              
 


Sniper
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2004
Total Posts : 6518
   Posted 12/21/2009 7:56 AM (GMT -7)   
Rando,,,the voice of reason...Next question. Why do the doors always open in where you have to handle that filthy , germy handle after washing up ?
If we would read the secret history of our enemies,we would find in each mans life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility.


HabsHockeyFan
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 3130
   Posted 12/21/2009 1:38 PM (GMT -7)   
But Sniper..the doors only open in when they have hand dryers instead of paper towels. If you have a paper towel, you can grab the door. Crohns law I suppose.
I also want to know why the stall doors open in toward the toity? I am a contortionist after this weekends shopping trip.

By the way....Thank you AC Moore for always having a clean and available restroom (we need to praise those that do more). I think I have paid for their restrooms with all the cake decorating supplies I buy...but I will spend even more if they keep up the nice bathrooms!
Dx'd '90 (emergency rupture), symptoms ignored long before that, '03 fistulas and bad flagyl reactions, B12 weekly, Pentasa [until I surrender to the bigger meds]
I'm riding on the escalator of life....


nawlinscate
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 656
   Posted 12/21/2009 4:17 PM (GMT -7)   
I've actually asked for the manager of the local Office Depot and thanked him for having clean bathrooms that I always feel comfortable using in an emergency. I've explained that I have a chronic disease--and told him that, once I'm in the store, I wind up buying something half the time anyway. He was really pleased to be complimented.

randynoguts
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2003
Total Posts : 6049
   Posted 12/21/2009 5:20 PM (GMT -7)   
dont knoiw on the door thing sniper. thats puzzled me forever!
randynoguts 



     http://www.geocities.com/randynogutsweb/


Becky77
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 1768
   Posted 12/21/2009 8:53 PM (GMT -7)   
It's simple...bathrooms were NOT designed by people who understand how much a clean, well designed bathroom can mean to a person. They are designed by people who have their 1 BM at home, and only go in a time or two each day to empty their bladders. Oh, and they also are the same people who don't care if they pick up germs on the handle when leaving because THEY have fabulous immune systems and never catch all the crap everyone else does.
Becky

31 yr old female-dx with Crohn's in '97 after emergency resection and appendectomy, 2nd resection '05, Bilateral pulmonary emboli 10/09
Currently on Humira, Omeprazole, Effexor, Seroquel, Calcium, Vit D, sublingual B12, Coumadin


Sniper
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2004
Total Posts : 6518
   Posted 12/21/2009 10:01 PM (GMT -7)   
Good point Becky. Sooooo they are like politicians..Clueless
If we would read the secret history of our enemies,we would find in each mans life sorrow and suffering enough to disarm all hostility.

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