Signs that you are a Crohnie

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Regular Member

Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 28
   Posted 7/17/2010 6:29 PM (GMT -6)   
my friend sent me this...I thought you all would enjoy it :)

Signs that You are a Crohnie!

You have a whole shelf in your pantry dedicated to your meds
You can tell what part of your GI tract is off kilter today by the sounds..
when you tell the phlebotomist, "trust me, thats not a good vein. no, you don't want to poke there either...
"your grandparents ask you what they can expect when they go in for their first colonoscopy
you can clench your buttcheeks so hard you are sure if you put coal in there you could make a diamond
Your not a med student but your bookcase is 75% medical texts.
Every skin rash triggers an emotional crisis!
If You have larger clothes for bloated days..
Your family comes to you for medical advice.
You desperately wish Ensure came in more than 3 or 4 flavors..
you stock up on clear liquids for flares or tests
You look like you're 6 months pregnant by bedtime.
When your cats feel sorry for you and cuddle up close to comfort you.
You would never say I have a "stomach ache," but are more likely to say "my right lower quadrant is hurting," or "my inflamed ileum is giving me trouble!"
You know the ER staff and all your doc's offices people by first name without having to look
you are the only person you know that actually wants to eat salad but can't
you have ever heard" i had the flu last week so I know what you are going through
"Scrubbing Bubbles go on strike.The Tidy Bowl man leaves a "Dear John" letter.
you see your undigested lunch bits in the toilet less than an hour after you ate it.
you have a heating pad next to your bed for those painful nights.your husband looks at your *** and doesn't get turned on.
You've fantasized about having a time machine for the express purpose of hunting down whoever developed Prednisone.
you can run, unzip, unbutton, untie, and unbuckle all at the same time
Mike Rowe refused to clean your toilet for the "Dirty Jobs" show
you feel faint when someones says," Oh Crap"….
you take handfuls of pills at a time,you can swallow 15 pills in one swig of wateryou pay Doctor bills on a monthly basis
you know the location of every bathroom in you local target, walmart, supermarket, etc
You've ever "accidentally" let out a silent-but-deadly just to hurry the meeting along or for revenge on the guy who always says "just one more thing" when everyone else is ready to go.
Your family and friends have fitted body armor and battle plans for those times they have to go Prednisone DEFCON 1 again.

Post Edited (Peace08) : 7/18/2010 7:42:21 AM (GMT-6)

Regular Member

Date Joined Feb 2010
Total Posts : 403
   Posted 7/17/2010 6:48 PM (GMT -6)   
This is great!! really enjoyed reading this... needed the laugh. =)
40 to three wonderful kids, and wife to an amazing , supportive husband of 18 years..
Diagnosed with gluten intolerance April 2009

Diagnosed with Crohn's March 2010- Mayo Confirmed May 2010
Back on Prednisone, Colestipol.Nexium, Propranolol, Vivelle patch
No longer on Imuran due to pancreatitis
Have taken Entocort, Bentyl, Flagyl, Lomidil, Pentasa
Have had myriad of health problems attributed to many different things over the past ten years. Our family has a history of Crohn's, Ulcerative Colitis and Bowel Cancer.

Regular Member

Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 383
   Posted 7/17/2010 6:52 PM (GMT -6)   
OMG!! I loved this! Hubby was reading over my shoulder going yep, yep, yep...!
Dx'd w/ Crohn's in 1979 at age 13. Bad flare 2008 but no health insurance so I dealt with it. Colonoscopy in July 2009 caused a perforated colon, emergency bowel resection. 2 fistula's, perianal and perivaginal.

Humira, probiotic, a multivitamin, calcium, magnesium, zinc, and fish oil. I also take Tramadol 50 mg and Klonopin (for anxiety) as needed.

Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance!

Veteran Member

Date Joined Sep 2009
Total Posts : 1143
   Posted 7/17/2010 8:21 PM (GMT -6)   
This was sooo good! Thank you for the laugh. I really needed it today.

Regular Member

Date Joined Jun 2010
Total Posts : 59
   Posted 7/18/2010 11:31 AM (GMT -6)   
haha! :)
23 y/o
Diagnosed in 2007
Misdiagnosed w/ Lactose Intolerance @ 11 y/o
Misdiagnosed w/ IBS @ 16 y/o
3 hospital stays in the last 6 months
been on Asacol, Pentassa, Remicaide, Humira, Prednisone on and off (I think it's the devil) and lost more random things.
Right now 6MP ,Monthly B-12,Fish Oil, about to start Cimzia, just went off prednisone AGAIN, just stopped Humira
Married with a 3 y/o
~Want to get this back in control so I can try for another baby! :)

Regular Member

Date Joined Jul 2010
Total Posts : 33
   Posted 7/18/2010 11:41 AM (GMT -6)   
****!!!!!!!!!!! where did your friend find it????

Regular Member

Date Joined May 2010
Total Posts : 88
   Posted 7/18/2010 1:47 PM (GMT -6)   
that is great!!!
imagination is stronger than knowledge -- myth is more potent than history -- dreams are more powerful than facts -- hope always triumphs over experience -- laughter is the cure for grief -- love is stronger than death.

Regular Member

Date Joined Nov 2003
Total Posts : 351
   Posted 7/19/2010 10:08 AM (GMT -6)   
Now that was great and some were right on!   
Thanks for the laugh I needed it.

Becoming undone
Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2007
Total Posts : 927
   Posted 7/19/2010 11:27 AM (GMT -6)   
LOVED it! Thank you thank you thank you! Was not having such a good morning, but this brought a smile, and a guffaw or two or three...I especially like the salad one...can't tell you how much I'm craving that salad...
"The earth laughs in flowers"

Elite Member

Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 24909
   Posted 7/19/2010 12:07 PM (GMT -6)   
sure needed this today
brought out some good laughs
aint it the truth

                 Co Mod for... CROHNS..ANXIETY/ PANIC.....ALZHEIMERS
        DX.. a/p ....crohns ...fibro... pyoderma gangrenosum..seizures....deaf
            meds..lyrica..pentasa...valproic acid..ativan...diazepam....t 3 s prn
                  Help HEALING
                        WE CAN N WILL GET THRU THIS TOGETHER

Veteran Member

Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 6927
   Posted 7/19/2010 12:07 PM (GMT -6)   
that is great
Forum Co-moderator - Crohn's Disease/Thyroid Disorders:_All comments have the caveat contact your local health care provider.

I will find a way or make one. –Phillip Sidney 1554-1586

All that I am and all that I shall ever be, I owe to my Angel Mother.

The Bucket List- Have you found joy in your life?  Has your life brought joy to others?

Make sure your suffering has meaning…

Veteran Member

Date Joined May 2009
Total Posts : 506
   Posted 7/19/2010 12:24 PM (GMT -6)   
Hahaha, awesome.
Diagnosed with CD July 2007
Currently on Remicade, Imuran, probiotics, folic acid, multivitamin.
Resection December 2009

Amor fati - Nietzsche

Veteran Member

Date Joined Aug 2007
Total Posts : 884
   Posted 7/19/2010 12:27 PM (GMT -6)   
Very funny and very true!

Crohn's Disease with Arthritis, Non-Erosive Reflux Disease, Gastritis, Hashimoto's Thyroiditis, Endometriosis, Depression/Anxiety 

Veteran Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 1118
   Posted 7/19/2010 12:37 PM (GMT -6)   
Could really relate to some of them!!!! thanks for the laugh Bevx
Diagnosed with crohns at 13 now 43
Still battling with Doc's to get me on maintenance Meds only taking
Lomotil, 20mg citalopram,VSL#3 at the moment.

“I may not be where I need to be but,
I thank God I’m not where I use to be “

Regular Member

Date Joined Jun 2006
Total Posts : 229
   Posted 7/19/2010 12:45 PM (GMT -6)   
So perfect and TRUE! Thanks for sharing.
Crohn's Disease for 18 years.. 1st Resection June 2009 developed anastomostic leak and EC fistula. 2nd Resection, April 1, 2010-to fix leak and fistula-feeling fabulous now.  Taking 100mg Imuran for maintenance. 

Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2010
Total Posts : 171
   Posted 7/21/2010 5:33 PM (GMT -6)   
Ahhh so true!

thanks for that!
26 y/o female from Kentucky.
Diagnosed with Crohn's in 2004. Colon resection in 2004
Had symptoms since about 2002.
Also lactose intolerant and anemic.
Currently on 2000mg daily of Sulfasalazine and 1 tablet daily folic acid.
Tried Pentasa and Entocort in the past, with no improvement.

Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2005
Total Posts : 362
   Posted 7/22/2010 10:15 PM (GMT -6)   
OMG that was hilarious!! esp loved the run, unbuckle, unzip and untie at the same time! LOL and the
one about taking 15 pills wth a swig of water :) So very true

I saw another one years ago and it was totally diffeent, I should try to find it...
30 years old, dx with Crohn's in 1998. Currently on Imuran 100mg/day, Flagyl 1000mg/day
and Cipralex 10mg/day for anxiety. Just got off Cipro which was my drug for last 4 years.
Perianal fistula, and 2 more suspected. Crohn's only at end of colon, cecum. Remi and asacol did NADA.

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