I'm so sorry this is all happening for you. I think increasing the Remicade might be a good strategy before the surgery -- let us know what the doctor says about that!
I'm a single mom and the worst thing about being sick has been trying not to stress out my kids, who have already been through alot the last few years with my separation (unreliable dad, had to move suddenly, etc). I'm not having as much pain as you are, but I have been sick and missed some work every week since I got out of the hospital about six weeks ago. I notice my kids "watching" me sometimes to see if I'm OK and that just breaks my heart. I mostly try to not share with them if I'm feeling unwell -- they've been through enough and the deserve a healthy mom. (
On the plus side, my kids (and yours too I know) are amazing -- truly resilient. I hope that in some small way they are getting the message that hard things can happen in life, but that life can still be funny, sweet and full of joy.
44 years old, newly diagnosed after an 8-day hospitalization in September 2007 but symptoms for several years before that.
Medications: Pentasa, Prednisone (tapering), Prilosec.
Supplements: probiotics, calcium, vitamin C, vitamin E and a multi-vitamin.
History of hypothyroid (dx 2004, taking Synthroid) and gall bladder surgery (1997).
Single working mom to three wonderful kids, ages 9 to 15.