Mochiah, Good Evening. You are not friendless; you have friends here now, I am one of many you are making. So let me start with a hug for you dear lady. It is a commonality in members with depression to feel isolated and to feel we are alone. Part of it is that old stinkin thinkin and the other comes from our life experiences. We are naturally more sensitive and start to doubt that we are worthy when in truth that is just plain hogwash. I know I get into a down spiral and I am afraid to even make a plan for lunch as I don't know how I will feel. I am frozen in my place and it is difficult to reach out. Some of it is fear of rejection. It is important to believe in yourself. A lot of people get depressed because they put themselves down. It is important to satisfy yourself and gain a sense of self-worth. It is good to do something that would make you happy. Prioritizing your self can help you to believe that your own life is important and can be enjoyed. Being kind to yourself is one of the most important steps to get away from a depressive state.
I challenge you to sit down and write only good things about who you are and all the good and healing you have done. Now read your list and apply it to yourself. You are worthy of the same treatment as you bestow so generously on others. Mochiah, learn to be at peace with yourself.
Get to know who you are, what makes you really happy, and learn to balance what you can and cannot change about yourself. You are a winner in this game of life, so reach out and grab the brass ring. Take a chance on making new friends. Gentle Hugs to youKitt
I think Kitt has hit the nail right on the head... SELF BELIEF. Like you, I have helped many people, both physically and online here on HW. I seem perfectly capable of sorting other peoples problems but when it comes to my own, I push them to one side and look at someone else... hence, my problems never get sorted since I never look at them. If I had the self confidence to sort them (and I am getting there) I could almost be a different person. I try to imagine my life without depression but I dont know if its a fantasy or not since I believe I have lived with depression from about 6-7 years old (I am 22 now). It took me so long to do something about it, depression became the norm. I am slowly rebuilding my self belief and I think that is the kep to self healing. I hope you too, can do this.
You have been given some very good advise here. We tend to underestimate ourselves. And you do so much for others, why can't you do for yourself? That is such a good question. We are all like that, myself included. I think that we have had something in our past that stops us from enjoying things. I have had experiences when I am having a good time and then all of a sudden I feel guilty about it. Like I am doing something wrong. Or I don't deserve to feel this good. In time, with practice of the advise given to you, that will be less and less.
You are a wonderful person and try to remember that. If we get taken advantage of along the way, so be it. At least we have nothing to feel guilty about. We can look in the mirror and see a good person. That you are..... We will tell you that until you are sick of hearing it.LOL.
So I say take the advise that these wonderful people gave you and try to love yourself, you are worthy and deserve it.
Dear Sue,Wow your hubby is awesome and what a wonderful thing for him to say to you. Give him a hug for me. Yes that should be on your list for sure.I love music and I have pulled myself up out of the dumps or even just sat and cried while a song talk to me. Here is one that says it better than I could:
Lean on me when you're not strong and I'll be your friend I'll help you carry onFor it won't be long till I'm gonna need Somebody to lean on. Bless you, you will be ok, one baby step at a time. Kitt