Life still throwing bricks

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Dark
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 105
   Posted 2/11/2008 9:42 AM (GMT -7)   
Alcohol makes my ex crazy... Last night i met her for her birthday she recently moved down to where i stay got a job the whole thing and she has been trying to get me back under the friendship front in spite of everything i have done and said to make it clear that we will never get back together.

So last night i told her that i wanted to break all contact with her for a while and after that if we both feel like it we could try the friends thing she was already a bit tipsy by the time she picked me up for dinner started drinking the minute we got to the place i knew this was going to go bad but i stayed and tried to talk but she got more and more irrational and when she started making treats i got up and left. I was walking home when she caught up with the car she apologized said i should get in she would drop me at home so i did next minute she started speeding when i asked her what she was doing she said that she was going to crash the car and kill us both i tried to reason she just went crazy the car was speeding out of control and when she slowed down for a stop i pulled up the handbrake the car skidded she tried to wrestle loose the hand brake but the car came to a stop and i jumped out she grabbed me but i pulled free.

Once more she caught up to me driving next to me asking if i would get back in apologized she was driving into on coming traffic so i said i would drive she agreed thought i would take her home but she refused to tell me where she stayed asked if we could talk so i stoled we talked and i just told her the same that she needs to move on with her life and that it cant be next thing she pulled out a bottle of pills and started swallowing so i got out and started walking again.

once more she came speeding after me demanding i get in threatening to drive into traffic i knew it was dumb but i got in besides it was about 20 miles to my place along walk at 11pm at night she calmed down and started to drive me home but about 2miles from home i said something that triggered her and she started speeding again a car drove in front of us and she had to break i jumped out and ran away.... Started walking home but when i got there she was standing outside with her car so i hid behind a bush hoped she would get tired and leave i didn't have the strength to argue with a drunk irrational women. about and hour later she was still there left like a 100 messages on my mobile that she was not leaving so i phoned the ppl i stay with told them the story they said i should just come in they would help if she was any trouble... she was trouble so they phoned the police and they came she refused so they took her away...... I am hoping she is going to go away but some how i don't think so ...Life just keeps trwoing me bricks i am figthing just sometimes i dont know if its worth it......  


faithfully4you
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2007
Total Posts : 870
   Posted 2/11/2008 11:40 AM (GMT -7)   
Dark~
This relationship sounds like depression is secondary to alcoholism.  The combination however is deadly!!!
 
I am a great advocate for holding relationships together and dealing with the issues that are tearing them apart, however in your case I think that if you stay with this relationahip you may end up in jail or in severe harms way.  Not because of something you do but her.  You will be "guilty by association".
 
It is hard to stay away from someone you love and believe me it takes everything I have to say away from the one I love.{He is the healthy one of us, he was always there for me}.
 
How very self-destructive this relationship sounds, it makes one be concerned about your wellbeing.
 
Keep us posted, prayers!
Teresa
 
 
Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results 
 


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40603
   Posted 2/11/2008 2:14 PM (GMT -7)   

Hi Dark,

I think you can see the answer.  You definately have to stay away from her.  Can you get a restraining order put on her?  She could have gotten you both killed last night.  I know that you have every right to go where you want to go, but if I were you I would stay away from places that you think she might be at.  She could do you some severe harm.  I know how hard that you have worked to get well, and this invironment isn't good for you.  Please think about it Dark. 

Luv and hugs,

Karen


fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue, clinically depressed and allergies


ShynSassy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 2/12/2008 6:13 AM (GMT -7)   
Dark

Wow, I really think it might be time to break all contact,and force her to break it. Go to the police station and file a restraining order against her. Tell them what has been going on.

You don't need this..you are getting your life together and this person is just trying to bring you down with her.

You deserve so much better.
Shy


Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 2/12/2008 1:03 PM (GMT -7)   

Hello Dark, This is Kitt.  My opinion for the day is to cease and desist any contact with this woman.  She has serious problems and you cannot fix them.  She is irrational and dangerous.  You may need to get a restraining order against her. Just my 2 cents for what it is worth. :)

I am sorry she moved to where you are but for your sake my friend, keep posting here and let us help you through this.  You have to take care of you first.  You have come so far and you have far to go.  There is much good in your future so please do not try to save this person, save you.
Gentle Hugs
Kitt


 
Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety ~ Panic  ~ Crohn's
*~* http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
 


ShynSassy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 2/15/2008 5:20 AM (GMT -7)   
Dark

Just checking to see how you are doing??
Shy


Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 2/16/2008 4:12 PM (GMT -7)   

Hello Dark,
We are hear for you and please talk to us, don't wall yourself off and get all mixed up in taking responsibility for another's behavior.  Please remember right now you are fighting for your own life and you need to put you first.

You must be good to you and not feel guilt because this lady has shown up where you are.  She got there so she must take care of herself. 
Bless you my friend
Kitt


 
Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety ~ Panic  ~ Crohn's
*~* http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
 


djdaz_1985
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 2408
   Posted 2/18/2008 1:53 AM (GMT -7)   

Hi Dark,

I too an concerned about you. Kitt is right, you cannot accept responsibility for another persons actions. Please concentrate on getting yourself back on track. This should be your main concern at the moment. If you dont get yourself back on track, you cannot help anyone else. Please check in with us!

Darren


Everyone has a guardian angel. They help pick you up when you fall, comfort you through your times of need and help you appreciate the times when things are going well.
 
"A gold medal is a wonderful thing. But if your not enough without it, you will never be enough with it." - Irvine Blitzer (John Candy) in Cool Runnings
 
Moderator - Epilepsy Forum
Co-Moderator - Depression Forum
 
Help support the forums so we can support you:  http://www.healingwell.com/donate
 


Dark
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 105
   Posted 2/18/2008 2:07 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi everyone you are all correct i guess i know these things.Just wish i could switch off my brain and that little voice that keeps telling me i am selfish i am worthless the toughts that make me feel so weak wish i could just be strong so that things so small and insignificant dont send me plumiting into the deep dark hole i have been trying to stay out of........

ShynSassy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 2/18/2008 5:23 AM (GMT -7)   
Dark

First of all you are very strong!! Look at your past and what you have achieved. I know that things are not going as you wanted,but they are still improving... don't let this person take you down,she is not worth it.
You have come so far and are seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.


We are here for you and are all hoping for the best for you.
Shy


Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia


djdaz_1985
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 2408
   Posted 2/19/2008 3:50 AM (GMT -7)   

Hi Dark,

Its good to hear from you again. I think Shy has hit the nail on the head really. You have achieved so much in the short time I have known you... you should be proud of that. Please dont let the person who is saying all these nasty things about you get control. You deserve better than that. I believe you can do it.

Darren


Everyone has a guardian angel. They help pick you up when you fall, comfort you through your times of need and help you appreciate the times when things are going well.
 
"A gold medal is a wonderful thing. But if your not enough without it, you will never be enough with it." - Irvine Blitzer (John Candy) in Cool Runnings
 
Moderator - Epilepsy Forum
Co-Moderator - Depression Forum
 
Help support the forums so we can support you:  http://www.healingwell.com/donate
 


Dark
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 105
   Posted 2/20/2008 3:43 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Everyone

Thank you for the support and words of encouragement they help when times are dark.Today i have some hope again and i can see that i have growen alot i know there is still lots more of that needed and it will happen weather i like it or not as long as i keep moving forward.

I am slowly starting to get to know myself, how and why i act in certain ways i try and learn from it and adapt but old habits die hard. The good thing is that everyday a little bit more is revealed. At the moment i am just taking every day every hour as it comes as it all becomes a bit to much if i think to far ahead.
I am learning about God and the Bible more and more and as strange and scary as religioun might be to the world today it has given me some hope meaning purpose and understanding of the temporary world we will all leave one day.

Take care and thank you
Dark

ShynSassy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 2/20/2008 4:55 AM (GMT -7)   
You have come so far Dark,and you have such a great attitude about getting better.

Keep trudging along that road and I know you will get to where you want to be.
Shy


Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 2/23/2008 12:28 AM (GMT -7)   

Dark, my friend, I have had faith in you form the beginning as you were willing to reach out to us here. I am so glad you are getting to know yourself better.  Keep your faith in your God and keep posting as we are here.

Hugs
Kitt


 
Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety ~ Panic  ~ Crohn's
*~* http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
 


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40603
   Posted 2/23/2008 4:01 AM (GMT -7)   

Hi Dark,

I understand how hard that this all is.  But you are doing the right thing.  You will learn and grow as you go.  And you are right, one step at a time.  But you will get there my friend.

Like Kitt says, keep your faith in your God and we ARE here for you.

I hope that your days come easier with time.

hugs,

Karen


  Moderator-Depression
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

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