What gives someone purpose in their life?

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Eeyore11
New Member


Date Joined Feb 2008
Total Posts : 4
   Posted 2/25/2008 10:25 AM (GMT -7)   
One of the symptoms of depression is a feeling of worthlessness which is something I can identify with. If I can identify feeling worthless, surely that means I know what would make me worthwhile? I don't though and my therapist wants me to come up with some ideas.
 
Has anyone any thoughts on what makes someone worthwhile or gives their life a purpose?

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40601
   Posted 2/25/2008 10:38 AM (GMT -7)   

Hi Eeyore,

First of all I want to welcome you to the Healing Well depression forum.  You have come to a good place.  Everybody here is very supportive.

Now, I feel like I would be doing your homework for you with the answers to this question.  I think that the therapist would like you to do this on your own. 

But I will give you some suggestions.

Why did you start this thread?  Think about it.  You will find the answers that you are looking for.  And that could be thought of as a clue.

Keep posting,

hugs, Karen


  Moderator-Depression
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


Eeyore11
New Member


Date Joined Feb 2008
Total Posts : 4
   Posted 2/25/2008 10:59 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Karen
 
I've spent many an hour with my therapist thinking about this and it was actually her that suggested I asked others for some ideas so I am not really cheating!!
 
It's difficult to say what makes someone worthwhile (is it because they are a kind person or raise a loving family or donate money to charity?) and I guess everyone has different ideas. Am I worthwhile just because I am me? Probably, yes, but why then do I feel so worthless (apart from the depression)?
That's why we changed the question to what gives someone purpose? If I vanished off the face of the earth, my family would notice but the world would carry on perfectly okay. It's not as if I am making a difference in anyone's life or to anything that's going on around me.
 
Maybe I am expecting too much. Perhaps we don't need a purpose but that brings me back to what the point of it all is and why I should keep struggling to get better.
 
I will keep thinking but if anyone has any ideas I would appreciate them.
 
Thanks, Eeyore

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40601
   Posted 2/25/2008 12:22 PM (GMT -7)   
Eeyore,

Though you feel worthless at this time, you are not. You sound like a very special person to me.

The worthlessness is all a part of the depression that you are going through, I think that your therapist wants you to feel worthy to yourself. I am sure that you have touched many lives and don't even realize it.

I feel worthy when I can help others. But I also feel it when I do something for myself. Though I have the days when I wonder, "what the heck am I here for?" I realize that it is a part of my depression and I look for things to help me feel worthwhile. So I know I am still not answering your question about yourself. I cannot do that for you, you will learn this on your own journey through life. But I did tell you something about myself.

Good luck, keep posting, you are very interesting to talk to.

hugs,
Karen


  Moderator-Depression
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Post Edited (getting by) : 2/25/2008 12:25:58 PM (GMT-7)


Mochiah
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2007
Total Posts : 450
   Posted 2/25/2008 5:48 PM (GMT -7)   
What makes me feel worthy is knowing I have raised 3 wonderful children to young adulthood....The love for and from my grandchild...Knowing that I touch some people's lives while coming here...My education that I paid for myself...And the success I have become with my job. I may not directly touch someone's life like their doctor or nurse does, but I type up those doctor's reports and if they mis-state a medication dosage, I look into it and correct it and save them from being overdosed somewhere down the line, then I have touched their life without them knowing it....My dogs and rabbits make me feel worthy knowing that they depend on me.

My depression makes me feel worthless, my pain makes me feel worthless...sometime I make MYSELF feel worthless with my thoughts
Mochiah/a.k.a. Sue
cervical fusion 2006
L4-5 surgery with cages, plates, and screws in 2005
MEDS:  Fentanyl patch, Norco, Celexa, trazodone, and baclofen
 
To handle yourself, use your head...to handle others, use your heart
 
I'm going to smile like nothing is wrong, act like everything is perfect, and pretend its not hurting me.


ShynSassy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 2/26/2008 4:43 AM (GMT -7)   
Eeyore

I think that anyone with depression has felt that way one way or another..I struggle with it everyday.

What about finding a local charity and volunteering? It could be a pet shelter,it could be the Big Brothers and Big Sisters,or going to the local shelters and donating some time...
Shy


Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia


Eeyore11
New Member


Date Joined Feb 2008
Total Posts : 4
   Posted 2/26/2008 4:46 AM (GMT -7)   
Thanks everyone for your thoughts. They've given me a lot to think about.

I had believed that you had to actively make a difference in someone else's life to be worthwhile / have a purpose but I'm now thinking that's not necessarily true. Just making people smile or laugh is a purpose isn't it? Or baby sitting for my little neice?
I wish I had my own dreams to pursue as acheiving them would make me feel I had done something worthwhile. I don't though as my head is so clouded with depression and drugs. I guess the dreams will come in time though.

Maddi, I am really sorry to hear about your sister. One of my closest friends committed suicide just before Christmas and I've found that hard enough to deal with. I cannot imagine losing a sibling. My thoughts are with you.
You are right that I couldn't put my family through the pain. There are days though when I do wonder but I know that's the depression talking.
Pain is temporary, quitting is forever


Eeyore11
New Member


Date Joined Feb 2008
Total Posts : 4
   Posted 2/26/2008 4:53 AM (GMT -7)   
Shy

That's a really good idea.

Someone had suggested voluntary work to me before but I hadn't really done anything about it and kept finding excuses not to!
It will give me a sense of purpose and something to do with my days while I'm not allowed to work. Good plan.

I'll look into it now before I find another excuse!
Thanks.
Pain is temporary, quitting is forever


ShynSassy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 2/26/2008 5:07 AM (GMT -7)   
Eeyore,first of all your attitude and wanting to get help is what is going to help you get better... you have made huge steps in that department.

I also thought of something else, about 4 years ago I volunteered for a nursing home where I would just go for a couple hours on a Saturday and visit with some of the patients..it was awesome for me,and I loved hearing their stories.. but it was sad because alot of them don't have their families coming to see them on a regular basis...so make sure you can handle that part.
Shy


Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia


djdaz_1985
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 2408
   Posted 2/26/2008 8:42 AM (GMT -7)   

Hi there,

What gives someone purpose? Thats a question only the person can answer. Just because you know what isnt the answer, it doesnt mean that you know what is. It is something that is personal to everyone since people are motivated by different things. You need to look within yourself for the answer... looking at your true motivation for posting here is a good start

Darren


Everyone has a guardian angel. They help pick you up when you fall, comfort you through your times of need and help you appreciate the times when things are going well.
 
"A gold medal is a wonderful thing. But if your not enough without it, you will never be enough with it." - Irvine Blitzer (John Candy) in Cool Runnings
 
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