Hello and I am sorry for your problems.............I do agree with Karen. Giving your girlfriend some space may help her to better sort out what is on her mind.
If you continue to feel so depressed you may want to make an appointment for a physical with your PCP. Sometimes talking to someone who is there just for you helps you put a new spin on what is happening.
Hi Kit, Hi Karen, and behindtheseeyves wow thanks so much for the support and real talk. Yesterday I went to see my girls and My Jamie was very happy to see me and told me how much she misses me. Today she called and as I did not expect she said " I do love you so much!!" So I have really been giving her some real space, taking care of things such as fixing my credit etc... She did her hair with the same blonde streaks as when we met and I complimented her by saying " You look fantastic" So I was just smoking a cigarette outside and she did call to say that she would be home after work in like 15 minutes which she did, we both were blushing so much like 2 kids, had dinner w her mom and the kids, then sat on the couch, she fell asleep and also put both legs on me, taking her shoes off so I gave her a little foot massage and she was smiling really a lot. Does space also mean no sex, it's been like 10 days so far, some friends were telling just bad things but as I know her, she gets freaky here and there since after the kids. If a month goes by would that mean that she has someone else but just does not want to hurt my feelings or that it is just a part of the Space situation or she is testing me. I can wait for her forever, in my past relationships, I could just move on but with her, no way I can't even if I try and that's the truth. Since yesterday, I feel less depressed and think about us less but she is in the back of my mind. We hugged for like 5 minutes, she always insist that I call her when i get home and to drive safely. One of my close friend's dad died 2 days ago and she asked me if she could come along to the funeral home and I said yes, I did not except that at all, thought she hated me at time.
edited to add: I thought of the perfect song, but I need to go find what the name of it is and who it is by....it is a country-ish song where the guy is telling the girl that he wants to know everything about her, he wants to drive down all the country roads she drove while growing up, wants to know all her secrets, wants to know everything there is to know about her. I'll see if I can find it and get back atcha.
Post Edited By Moderator (ShynSassy) : 3/14/2008 5:59:23 AM (GMT-6)
I would be ther for the children and leave it at that. She has a lot of growing up to do and if you are there for her at this time, I think it would enable her. I think she needs to earn your trust back, if that is possible.
Does she even care about the children? I hope so, but she has problems with infadelities (sp). And with telling the truth. So I would take what she says with a grain of salt so to speak. I don't think she can be trusted at this point. But that is only my opinion, lets see what others have to say before you make any decisions. I wish you could see the kids more. I know they would love that.
I wish for you the best. You sound like such a nice person and a good father.
I think the children are hurting because of the situation, not necessarily anybodies fault. If there was blame to be placed, I would put it on her. Does she let you take the girls? Maybe you should have them for a weekend or something, they shouldn't lose their father over this. Or just take them to the park, something where she doesn't have to be involved. This is so sad to me because the children are suffering because of her being immature. Hopefully soon she will grow up and be the mother that they truly need. Does she see to all of their needs? Both physically and emotionally? I sure hope so. Have you thought about getting custody?
I feel that you should be able to have more contact with the kids. But not with her there all of the time. Does she make you uncomfortable when she is there? I know that she plays mind games with you, but does she argue or anything? Or does she let you spend time with the kids uninterrupted? It sounds like she has to be the center of attention. Am I right? If so that is just so immature.
I hope that you have a wonderful day,
Post Edited By Moderator (getting by) : 3/20/2008 4:58:57 PM (GMT-6)
You are deffinately doing the right things for your children. I deleted one word in your post, I am new and I think that I was suppose to but we still know what you are talking about. It is too bad that she would rather party than be with her children.
People like her don't know what they are missing when they neglect to be with their children when they are young. You can't get those years back. And there are no memories to fall back on. Women like that really get to me. I am so sorry you have to deal with it, but I guess if it wasn't for her, you wouldn't have those beautiful children. So keeping them at the utmost importance is top in your priority list.
She sounds like she has a lot of growing up to do. She sounds like a kid herself. I am so happy that you are on top of things.
I am sorry about your dog, that is so uncool. I am a dog lover. I have taken in so many abused dogs and turned them into healthy pets. I have two right now and don't know what I would do without them. I have a german shepard and an australian/pitbull mix. They are the greatest. I hope you don't lose yours. Is there somewhere else that you could keep him?
Just keep in mind that you are doing the right thing. You can't go wrong especially when it is for your children. They must be the light of your life. I am not suprised that her parents like you. I bet they wish she would straighten up, I know that I do. But you can't make her, I wonder if she is playing all lovey dovey because she knows that you could get those kids. She might be thinking if she can keep peace with you that you wont go after custody. I could be so wrong too.
I hope that you have a wonderful evening. Keep in touch.
Good morning Styves,
I am so sorry for what you are going through, and you are right on, she isn't a very good person. Not considerate at all as to what she is doing to you and your children.
I am glad that your dog is still there, but she should be taking care of her. I hope soon you will find a place where you can have your children and your dog.
LIke you said, what comes around, goes around and she will have her day/days. It will all fall back on her oneday.
I hope that you have a nice day and that good things come your way. You are a very special person, always remember that. And you are a good father.
Thank you so so Much Karen. I spoke to her mom and she was saying how much she would luv to see me on Easter Sunday as usual. It's crazy she will ask Jamie if she wants me there and her mom mentioned her boyfriend is not invited after I asked and she laughted and state "Not here he is coming" lol too funny