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Dark
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 105
   Posted 5/17/2008 1:01 PM (GMT -7)   
 
I just need to share i am sorry if i am breaking any rules i dont ...
1t started about 11 months ago an ordinary day i was caught in a dark hole of depression and in a desperate grab to life i posted on a website and one person responded,her name was Conni......
Rest in peace my dear friend i hope you found your peace.
 
 
Sorry Dark - had to edit you post..
My heart breaks for you at this time.
Maree
 
1. No discussion of any illegal activity or threats of violence. (ie. illicit drug use, including medical marijuana use, threats of suicide or self-injury, or threatened or intended physical harm).  Discussions of suicide or self-harm that are deemed negative and therefore potentially injurious to others are also not permitted.

 
 

Post Edited By Moderator (jordaNZone) : 5/17/2008 3:42:37 PM (GMT-6)


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40595
   Posted 5/17/2008 4:09 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Dark,

You are in my thoughts and prayers. I hope that things get better for you. Hang in there, we are here for you.

Luv and hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


enWayen
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 585
   Posted 5/18/2008 1:46 AM (GMT -7)   
Dark,

I don't know what happened, but please hang in there buddy.

Erik
Acceptance is the key

Existential depression and Insecurity

Try to keep smiling! :)


ShynSassy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 5/18/2008 4:51 AM (GMT -7)   
Dark
I am so sorry,please feel free to email me,then you can tell me what happened.


Stay strong
Shy


Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia

Please remember,I am not a professional..I am just a person who is also fighting depression.


I know I'm in my own little world, but it's ok. They know me here.


djdaz_1985
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 2408
   Posted 5/19/2008 2:41 AM (GMT -7)   

Hi Dark,

I know you have been through some very hard times in the last 6 months but you had the strength and courage to get yourself through them and I have every confidence in you that you can do it again. Please know that we are all thinking about you and care about you.

My inbox is always open

Darren


Everyone has a guardian angel. They help pick you up when you fall, comfort you through your times of need and help you appreciate the times when things are going well.
 
"A gold medal is a wonderful thing. But if your not enough without it, you will never be enough with it." - Irvine Blitzer (John Candy) in Cool Runnings
 
Moderator - Epilepsy Forum
Co-Moderator - Depression Forum
 
Help support the forums so we can support you:  http://www.healingwell.com/donate
 


Dark
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 105
   Posted 5/20/2008 3:14 AM (GMT -7)   
not dong so good dont know how to deal with all the emotions i am feeling right now ......

ShynSassy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 5/20/2008 4:47 AM (GMT -7)   
Dark,
You are doing one thing that should help,and that is at least talking about it.

Please tell us what is going on with you....
Shy


Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia

Please remember,I am not a professional..I am just a person who is also fighting depression.


I know I'm in my own little world, but it's ok. They know me here.


Dark
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 105
   Posted 5/20/2008 5:06 AM (GMT -7)   
I sent you a mail Shy guess you dident get it. i am not alowed to talk about it here on the forum so i just have to deal with it best i can... Take care

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40595
   Posted 5/20/2008 6:11 AM (GMT -7)   
Dark,

If it helps any, you can email me too. My address is in my profile. I think you really need to get this out in order to feel better.

You are in my thoughts and prayers,

Luv and hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


ShynSassy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 5/20/2008 3:57 PM (GMT -7)   
Dark
I am sorry, I saw your email and I responded..

Talk to us!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Shy


Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia

Please remember,I am not a professional..I am just a person who is also fighting depression.


I know I'm in my own little world, but it's ok. They know me here.


ShynSassy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 5/21/2008 4:11 AM (GMT -7)   
Dark

Remember,we love that you are with us,and will be here for you when you need us.

You have alot to give,and I know you will get through this...
Shy


Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia

Please remember,I am not a professional..I am just a person who is also fighting depression.


I know I'm in my own little world, but it's ok. They know me here.


djdaz_1985
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 2408
   Posted 5/21/2008 3:15 PM (GMT -7)   

Hi Dark,

Just wondering how you are doing today? Hoping your feeling a little better than before.

Darren


Everyone has a guardian angel. They help pick you up when you fall, comfort you through your times of need and help you appreciate the times when things are going well.
 
"A gold medal is a wonderful thing. But if your not enough without it, you will never be enough with it." - Irvine Blitzer (John Candy) in Cool Runnings
 
Moderator - Epilepsy Forum
Co-Moderator - Depression Forum
 
Help support the forums so we can support you:  http://www.healingwell.com/donate
 


Dark
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 105
   Posted 5/22/2008 10:44 AM (GMT -7)   
sad  i dont have words just so much emotion right now and not sure what to do with it all......

djdaz_1985
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 2408
   Posted 5/22/2008 11:40 AM (GMT -7)   

Generally I would say that emotion is always better out than in. Sometimes having a good cry or taking out our frustration at the gym can make us feel like there has been a release and that release allows the body to produce endorphins which make you feel good. Try going for a jog or having a friend round for a chat. I wouldnt turn to alcohol though... it might block the pain initially but it is a depressant drug and you will feel a whole heap worse when it wears off.

Keep Talking

Darren


Everyone has a guardian angel. They help pick you up when you fall, comfort you through your times of need and help you appreciate the times when things are going well.
 
"A gold medal is a wonderful thing. But if your not enough without it, you will never be enough with it." - Irvine Blitzer (John Candy) in Cool Runnings
 
Moderator - Epilepsy Forum
Co-Moderator - Depression Forum
 
Help support the forums so we can support you:  http://www.healingwell.com/donate
 


MMMNAVY
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 6927
   Posted 5/22/2008 4:34 PM (GMT -7)   
Journal?

I am sorry Dark.

I am also sorry there isn't more we can do to help.
Forum Co-moderator - Crohn's Disease
We will find a way, or make one.-Hannibal (crossing the Alps in the 15th Century on war elephants) 
All suggestions/options/opinions are caveated with please consult with your local health care provider...


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 5/22/2008 5:06 PM (GMT -7)   

Dear Dark,

This is Kitt and I am so very very sorry that your friend is gone.  I remember when you joined our site and you were making major changes in your life. You have come a long way and now this has hit you so hard.  You are grieving for your friend and wondering what you might have done to help Conni.  Please don't beat yourself up but know that you were a good friend.

My email box is open to you too, just click on the blue envelope and I will read.  Sometimes just writing it all down and sending it off to others helps.

"As you were you will always be,
Treasured forever in my memory."


 
Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety ~ Panic 
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
 


ShynSassy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 5/23/2008 4:04 AM (GMT -7)   
Dark

Even if you just say a few words here and there about how you are feeling, that is something.
Please don't keep this all bottled up inside.

Have you had any luck with finding some type of therapy?
Shy


Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia

Please remember,I am not a professional..I am just a person who is also fighting depression.


I know I'm in my own little world, but it's ok. They know me here.


Dark
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 105
   Posted 5/23/2008 7:14 AM (GMT -7)   
Thank you all for the words off encouragement.I am still feeling very low with all sorts of emotions boiling in a pot.
No i haven’t been able to find some type of therapy the reasons are many and i am not making excuses if it was an option i would use it.

I have lost ppl to death before but somehow this time its different its like getting punched in the stomach out of the blue left there gasping with the world going on as if nothing happened.

I have more i want to say but i cant without breaking the rules and right now i dont have the strength to talk around them to say what i am feeling ........

Thank you take care
Dark

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 5/23/2008 10:09 AM (GMT -7)   

Dear Dark,

I am here for you and please remember my ears are on so if you want to vent or whatever just shoot me a line.  I will listen and I won't judge. Write as much or as little as you want. 

Hugs

Kitt


 
Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety ~ Panic 
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
 


djdaz_1985
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 2408
   Posted 5/23/2008 10:33 AM (GMT -7)   
I think Navy's idea of journallingisa great idea. Nobody needs to read it unless you want them to so you can write ANYTHING you want. Its a great way to release some of the feelings inside as well. I only wish there were more I could do than offer advice and a sympathetic ear.

Everyone has a guardian angel. They help pick you up when you fall, comfort you through your times of need and help you appreciate the times when things are going well.
 
"A gold medal is a wonderful thing. But if your not enough without it, you will never be enough with it." - Irvine Blitzer (John Candy) in Cool Runnings
 
Moderator - Epilepsy Forum
Co-Moderator - Depression Forum
 
Help support the forums so we can support you:  http://www.healingwell.com/donate
 


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40595
   Posted 5/23/2008 4:41 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Dark,

Remember you can email me at any time. So please don't hesitate. I am hear for you.

Luv and hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


ShynSassy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 5/24/2008 4:08 PM (GMT -7)   
We are all here for you Dark,always remember that.
Shy


Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia

Please remember,I am not a professional..I am just a person who is also fighting depression.


I know I'm in my own little world, but it's ok. They know me here.


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 5/24/2008 4:08 PM (GMT -7)   

Hello Dark,

I am here for you and when your ready please do email and the journal idea is great too. 

You know we care and if you want to shout it out to me,  I will listen.  You have lots of offers so take your time and do what feels best to you.  Please don't isolate yourself .  Some time alone is good to reflect but don't stay away from those who care for you.

Hugs

Kitt 


 
Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety ~ Panic 
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
 


Dark
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 105
   Posted 6/1/2008 12:11 PM (GMT -7)   
Thank you to everyone for there support and advise i do appreaciat it very much........
 
For now i am just going trough it all i am angry and sad i am at a loss for words so much change... there is negative but there is positive to, it just overwhemls at times.
I know there is support and talking will help i just need to accept that i am not an island and that others can and want to help, that talking about everything wont make me weak that i wont be rejected that i cant and dont have to do it all alone......  
 
(((((((((((((((all)))))))))))))))    
 
 

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 6/1/2008 3:38 PM (GMT -7)   

Dear Dark,

First of all I hope you got my message of thanks for your support in another forum.  It touched my heart.

Yes talking helps and letting it out in small doses or a big vent is fine.  I understand your feelings of loss as when I lost my son I had so many emotions that I felt guilty for and did not realize at the time I had the right to feel everything as I was truly in my own hades here on earth.

I tried to take care of others as I wanted to do good by my son's memory and it nearly broke me into to pretend I was holding up well as on the inside I was dying.

So grieve in your own way, you own time and do not expect more of yourself then you are able to handle right now.

You know where to find me.

Hugs
Kitt


 
Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety ~ Panic 
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
 

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