Self motivation, give us your tips on how to get yourself out of the house...

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getting by
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Date Joined Sep 2007
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   Posted 6/23/2008 9:37 AM (GMT -7)   
Many of us have a problem of getting out and doing things when we are depressed.
 
Does anybody have any hints on how to you get yourself motivated?
 
The only thing that I can think of is to go slowly, doing little things.  Then eventually I get the inspiration to do bigger things.  I know that it isn't easy, but we all have to try.
 
So if you have things that work for you, please share.
 
hugs, Karen...
  Moderator-Depression
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


stkitt
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   Posted 6/23/2008 9:47 AM (GMT -7)   

Sometimes for me it is Just Do It thing.  If I keep coming up with reasons why not to I will never leave home.  The only thing to fear is fear itself.

Now I am doing good today but on another day my answer might have been different.

Hugs

Kitt


 

Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety, Panic & Depression 
*~*
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It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~


getting by
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Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40584
   Posted 6/23/2008 10:40 AM (GMT -7)   
No you are not taking up other's space, in fact when you space your paragraphs, it makes them easier to read.

I have to mention that this thread was your idea. You came up with it, I just started it. Thank you for the good idea for the thread.

You are an asset to this forum Brian, you have many good tips and suggestions. Also give very good advice. You help us all when you post. Try not to forget that. We really are happy to have you here. You have brightened things up as many other members have too.

Thanks for the idea Brian.
I wish for you the most wonderful day.
hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


jordaNZone
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   Posted 6/23/2008 1:53 PM (GMT -7)   

Great thread  :-)  

 When I hit a big low  eyes  ...just getting out of bed is a struggle -aaargh - hate that...however, it has to be done - sometimes it takes me two or three times to do stuff like going to town -sheesh - finally get there  - and find myself sitting in the carpark for ages, pretending to be waiting for someone lol until I pluck up the courage - but you know what, in the end it comes down to self praise for even the smallest things done.

I always find that writing a list of things I wanna do is a good thing too..tick them off as you go..each day being easier - as you cannot go back to square one coz you have already been there eh :-)

Sista J.


 
 
 
 
 


Shelter
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Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 155
   Posted 6/23/2008 3:49 PM (GMT -7)   
How to  get up, Get out , Get Motivated:
 
If I didn't already have some obilgations,   ( in other words, a GOAL set for me, to run towards)
 
I would prob be stuck in my house a lot more than I am
 
having Responsibilities... and others having expectations of me,  sometimes  motivates me, but its from the wrong way...
 
 
I believe that    to be TRUE to THINESELF,  we must   do things from the inside out...
whats in side flows out...
 
Depression   zaps most of us of motivation,
most  of us feel tired,  slothful   almost...
drained...
I sometimes feel like a GREAT BIG  SUCKER  attached itself to me & sucked the Life out of me...
 
I think  we also have  CHOICES TO MAKE
we CHoose to LIVE........... yes ?    ma qui?
 
 
to Live..  we have to engage  ... and get invovled...
 
I think adressing issues  head on    works best for me
 
 
1)  if I am afraid,... then march straight towards that fear  .. and face it
 
2)   if I am feeling  isolated.... then sometimes I might just go shopping...  or go visit  at a nursing home...
 
they welcome folks to become volunteers...
 
I KNOW many people who actually  were healed...  and   came out of their shells.... 
 
by volunteering.. wchih then led to other things...
 
 
To close off,   I read a great   book      it helped me 
 
"BE  Anxious for NOTHING "
 
tongue Happy LIVING !
They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their Strength, they shall mount up on wings as eagles, they shall run & not grow weary, they shall walk & not faint..."  Ish   40 v. 31 
~
Sjrogrens Syndrome, Asthema, Chronic Fatigue, Chronic Pain, Head aches, Migraines, Gastro Intestinal Problems , Esophegial Spasms;   Fibro Myalgia , Kidney Stones,  & CP (SI joint,   low mechanical back pain..L4 & L5 Vertebrae Misaligned,  Spinal Stenosis and Degenerative Disc Disease, Bulging Disc, anterolisthesis L4 L5L4 -- S1 pain  caused by osteoarthristis ,bone spurs, causing pinching or pressure on spinal chord)


Celey
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Date Joined May 2007
Total Posts : 1284
   Posted 6/23/2008 4:53 PM (GMT -7)   
I agree with Shelter about the obligations... Going to class is usually a big motivator for getting me out of bed, even when I'm in pain and would rather curl up and wish everything to go away...

Sometimes, though, not even class can get me up out of bed...

I don't know what to do on those days...
I think I am being picked on by life, sometimes. But's that okay. Life and I are good buddies... I know life doesn't mean no harm. It just is the way it is. I can accept that.


getting by
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Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40584
   Posted 6/23/2008 11:35 PM (GMT -7)   
What is motivating me right now is reading everybody elses posts. I never dreamed that this thread would actually become the motivation. This is so wonderful. Thanks for the idea Brian...

Wishing a wonderful day to all of you!!!

hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


djdaz_1985
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Date Joined Jan 2006
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   Posted 6/24/2008 1:23 AM (GMT -7)   

This thread is a really great idea. So many people struggle with motivation... even those without depression.

For me, motivation comes from reward. I have to have a goal which I want to acheive. Motivation to go to work comes from money. Motivation to do housework is the thought of sitting in a clean house and motivation to get out of bed it the idea of how bad I will feel if I waste the day.


Everyone has a guardian angel. They help pick you up when you fall, comfort you through your times of need and help you appreciate the times when things are going well.
 
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ShynSassy
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Date Joined Dec 2005
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   Posted 6/24/2008 4:06 AM (GMT -7)   
When I am at my lowest,I force myself to spend more time getting ready to leave somewhere...wearing a better outfit..doing my hair in a different way..that seems to help me.

And,I also try to just go places that I enjoy..like the library or to the farmer's market..
Shy


Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia

Please remember,I am not a professional..I am just a person who is also fighting depression.


I know I'm in my own little world, but it's ok. They know me here.


Gemsi
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Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 1050
   Posted 6/24/2008 5:01 AM (GMT -7)   
I tend too shove on a load of makeup, and a baseball cap, and force myself to leave the house. I also have too check absolutely everything at least 3 times, which tires me out before I even go. The amount of times, I've got downstairs, then had too run back up too triple check that the door is locked.
Even now I'm going out almost every day, it's still scaring me senseless, only now I have commitments and have to go.

I also will only go too places I know are going too be easy. Anywhere else like paying bills, is a nightmare, and paul still has too do that.

I have also got into taking my crutches if I'm going too be on my own, just too make me feel safer and more at ease. That way, I don' get a confrontation with the driver and everyone else on the bus, and also there's no chance of getting embarrased by falling over.

Little things I guess, just too settle my mind a bit. Less motivation though, more just forcing myself into doing stuff.

Another thing, is keeping a diary of what I've done. Even if it's-I dunno 'i went to the shop today' just too record that nothing bad happened, and so I can look back now, at how little I uesd to do copared too now. It makes me want to do more then.


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HealingBay
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Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 6/24/2008 7:37 AM (GMT -7)   

Hi,

I am new to this site. But I find it is a great community of very interesting people.

One thing I found very helpful was when I took myself out of the equation. I found it difficult to motivate to do stuff for myself. When you are little bit depressed, you are not excited by a lot of stuff you normally enjoy. Also some of us suffer from a small dose of anxiety too. I realized both my fear and lack of motivation was due to the fact that I was too focused on my own needs.
 
I decided to try a new approach. Instead of doing something for myself, I decided to do things for others. I used to call up my friends and find out what they wanted to do. I used to take my friends out to for eating or movies or to a game. I felt happier that I am doing something to make someone close to me happy, that made me happy in return. I have gotten more involved in the community ever since. Initially it was difficult for me to put myself aside, and motivate myself to think of somebody else's needs. But gradually it became easier. It was less stressful and more relaxing.
 
It might sound like a weird idea. Try this out and see if it helps.
 
Thanks,
HealingBay

Gemsi
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Feb 2007
Total Posts : 1050
   Posted 6/24/2008 8:30 AM (GMT -7)   
I like that Healingbay, it sounds like sound advice.

It's hard when in the midst of depression to do anything for yourself, yet half of the time, it's the main thing you think about. How bad things are for yourself. Turning your thoughts to making other people happy, is a very good way to trick your mind into doing something that will make you happy too. Only when you are happy, will you be confident enough too keep on going.


Moderator of the Cystic Fibrosis Forums
 Diagnosed with: Cystic Fibrosis, Asthma, ABPA, Clinical Depression, Mild Liver Cirrohsis, Mild Osteopenia, Erythema Nodosum. Waiting for final diagnosis on Muscular Dystrophy type symptoms.
 Medication: Creon 10,000, Flucloxacillin, Vitamins A,D+E, Serevent, Salbutamol, Paracetamol, Ondansetron, Nefopam, Ursodeoxycholic Acid, Saline neb/PEP system, Mirtazapine,slow-sodium, Skandishake and Fresubin.
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sheryl=jk
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Date Joined Oct 2004
Total Posts : 4083
   Posted 6/24/2008 12:53 PM (GMT -7)   
For me it was mostly anxiety, as wll as depression, and i have to admit meds have helped a good bit, but i have children they are a motivator to get out of the house. i like to go to church so that motivates me, i actually like grocery shopping, but it makes tired though, im iss going out with my friend, but i have met another friend, wish she wasnt long distance , i look forawrd to go see her.
 
God Bless,and have a Great Day!!.......Love.....Sheryl
xcema,hypermobile,Chronic Bronchitus,Fatigue,Positive ANAFibro-05--Had surgery on left & right knees 06, Interstial Cystitis-06  implanted Interstim-06 hysterectomy & IBS-06 Arthiritus-04 Depression-04GERDS/ Hiatial hernia -07   Anxiety-07 Gastroparesis-08--Occasional Migraines Reglan,Protonix,Prozac,Wellbutrin,Erthomyicin,klonipin,occasional phernergan Im marrried 2 children, one with mild autism, Bipolar(8), she takes Abilify, Buspar, Celexa Son(13) is bipolarw/migraines, Topamax, ZantacGod plz grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference..." Plz help HW to help others by donating: http://www.healingwell.com/donate/


enWayen
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Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 585
   Posted 6/25/2008 12:44 AM (GMT -7)   
Heej everyone,

Hoping, some of the things you say sound so familiar. Though I am not depressed anymore, I am still having a hard time being around others. Yesterday I left a party early because I needed some time on my own.

But that wasn't a bad thing to do, and doing what you want (without hurting others) is a great help. I used to stick at such a party feeling sad, while the solution of leaving is plain simple but very effective. Nowadays, I just do what I feel like, and it really helps.

Another thing that really helps me is trying to stay present, always, everywhere. One way to stay present is to listen to the birds, the frogs, and to focus on your breathing.

One final thing, I try not to listen to the music I like when I am not feeling well, since that is pretty depressing music. If I am doing well, I can listen to it without problems, but when I start feeling a bit worse, I turn up something more cheerful. Music has a great emotional impact, to me at least.

All the best,
Erik
Acceptance is the key

Existential depression and Insecurity

Try to keep smiling! :)


sheryl=jk
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Date Joined Oct 2004
Total Posts : 4083
   Posted 6/25/2008 4:23 AM (GMT -7)   
Good advive Erik!!
 
I have to drive my son to his freinds house today, then deposit a check and go to the store and fill a prescription, i will have my daughter with me so while waiting we we will look around the store,  its almost her birthday, i may have her try on some clothes I want to get her, and see if they fit or not , or wether she will need a belt etc, so thats kinda fun, sorta,its getting my *** of the  house. eyes
 
God Bless,and have a Great Day!!.......Love.....Sheryl
xcema,hypermobile,Chronic Bronchitus,Fatigue,Positive ANAFibro-05--Had surgery on left & right knees 06, Interstial Cystitis-06  implanted Interstim-06 hysterectomy & IBS-06 Arthiritus-04 Depression-04GERDS/ Hiatial hernia -07   Anxiety-07 Gastroparesis-08--Occasional Migraines Reglan,Protonix,Prozac,Wellbutrin,Erthomyicin,klonipin,occasional phernergan Im marrried 2 children, one with mild autism, Bipolar(8), she takes Abilify, Buspar, Celexa Son(13) is bipolarw/migraines, Topamax, ZantacGod plz grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference..." Plz help HW to help others by donating: http://www.healingwell.com/donate/


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 6/25/2008 8:29 AM (GMT -7)   

Awesome thread,  what gets me going is the competitiveness - if others can do it, So Can I cool

I am no flat tire so get off my bum and just do it.  I will survive.

Hugs guys..........your all the best.

Kitt


 

Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety, Panic & Depression 
*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~


tsdearman
New Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 16
   Posted 6/25/2008 9:32 AM (GMT -7)   
Well I have yet to find anything to motivate me enough. I thought that my desire to beat depression and social phobia would help. I have sooo much that needs to be done but just can't get the strength to do any of it. I am 8 1/2 months pregnant so that might have something to do with it. I just hope it is not an excuse. I live on the third floor and have a baby that barely walks so I don't look forward to lugging that kind of weight everywhere I go. but then again I hope that is not also an excuse. Yet sometimes I feel that it is an excuse to not get out of the house. I have become quite the hermit. This really is a great thread and I really look forward to being part of this support group. One day I believe I will find the strength to get out.

On another note usually it takes quite a bit to get me motivated. Like having the money to do the things I enjoy. When I do I love going on outings with my family like six flags. That is awesome, but everything to gets me up and going costs too much money.

tsdearman
New Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 16
   Posted 6/25/2008 9:42 AM (GMT -7)   
Well I am a writer. I like to do quotes and poems. One quote I have is... "Dreams are something that will one day be my reality"

Also a little history.... I was once an addict and I wrote this poem...

It is time for me to go
Time to say goodbye
so tired of what I have become
it is time to change my life

I have been everywhere
seen all I want to see
tired of this life i've lived
a tired soul and broken spirit that needs to be set free

Why do you have to lose
before you can finally see
that all that you have left behind
is all you really need


(This is still a work in progress let me know...)

tsdearman
New Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 16
   Posted 6/25/2008 9:43 AM (GMT -7)   
Correction.. "Dreams are something that will one day become my reality"

tsdearman
New Member


Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 16
   Posted 6/25/2008 9:44 AM (GMT -7)   
OOps posted the wrong forum

sheryl=jk
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Date Joined Oct 2004
Total Posts : 4083
   Posted 6/25/2008 2:51 PM (GMT -7)   
My husband took my car to work today, so i didnt get to go out, but will tommorow
 
God Bless,and have a Great Day!!.......Love.....Sheryl
xcema,hypermobile,Chronic Bronchitus,Fatigue,Positive ANAFibro-05--Had surgery on left & right knees 06, Interstial Cystitis-06  implanted Interstim-06 hysterectomy & IBS-06 Arthiritus-04 Depression-04GERDS/ Hiatial hernia -07   Anxiety-07 Gastroparesis-08--Occasional Migraines Reglan,Protonix,Prozac,Wellbutrin,Erthomyicin,klonipin,occasional phernergan Im marrried 2 children, one with mild autism, Bipolar(8), she takes Abilify, Buspar, Celexa Son(13) is bipolarw/migraines, Topamax, ZantacGod plz grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference..." Plz help HW to help others by donating: http://www.healingwell.com/donate/


sheryl=jk
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Date Joined Oct 2004
Total Posts : 4083
   Posted 6/26/2008 8:35 AM (GMT -7)   
for awhile for me it was anxiety, and depression, but the meds are helping with that, i still need a little moivator, today, im going to take my son to his friends house then go to bank, and store with my daughter. we might ;look around the stor a little bit as we wait for my presciptinon to be filled. so that will be kinda cool , i guess, beats being in the house the whole day, when the kids go back to school, I am goingot a substitue teaching workshop, apparantly you do not have to have college work to sub teach, they are in such desperate need for subs i guess. i get to choose my preference, which would be prek through 1st, after that, i dont reall know the work LOL!!  And i have taught preschool in a church before, so i think i will get the job, and that will certainly get me out of the house, i can only have a job withthe school system, as my daughter is too young to stay home with out adult supervison, i have to be home when she is home. She not ready to be left alone with her brother, and im ready to let her either.
Anyways i hope i get the subbing job, got to lose wiehgt first to fit in my clothes, hoping that holy tea gonna help me like it helped my friend and her mil, each lost over 50 pounds and not dieting or even exercising, so if if i lost 50 pounds I would be very happy to stay right there. :-)
 
God Bless,and have a Great Day!!.......Love.....Sheryl
xcema,hypermobile,Chronic Bronchitus,Fatigue,Positive ANAFibro-05--Had surgery on left & right knees 06, Interstial Cystitis-06  implanted Interstim-06 hysterectomy & IBS-06 Arthiritus-04 Depression-04GERDS/ Hiatial hernia -07   Anxiety-07 Gastroparesis-08--Occasional Migraines Reglan,Protonix,Prozac,Wellbutrin,Erthomyicin,klonipin,occasional phernergan Im marrried 2 children, one with mild autism, Bipolar(8), she takes Abilify, Buspar, Celexa Son(13) is bipolarw/migraines, Topamax, ZantacGod plz grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference..." Plz help HW to help others by donating: http://www.healingwell.com/donate/


enWayen
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 585
   Posted 6/26/2008 2:40 PM (GMT -7)   
Brian, the world is just a reflection of the way you look at it. No one can be in your world if you resist, yet they will be in your world when you allow them to. Having expectations (such as a girl being you gf) will create resistance. If you want someone in your world, accept who they are, what they act like etc. Then they will always be there, as themself, and not as a mind-created illusion of what you want them to be.

In fact, this is the single thing that got me out of that dark hole. I used to have expectations of everything, I used to create scenario's of what could happen, and I felt bad when things didn't work out (which was most of the time). I blamed, I hated, I cried. Yet the world is so beautiful if you allow it to show you its beauty. Every single person is beautiful in its own way, every animal, every plant, and every non-living thing. Having expectations will change their beauty in betrayel, and you will hate them, fear them, feel bad because of them.

Of course, it is really hard not to blame people for their behaviour. But people are who they are, and there is absolutely no need to feel bad because of that. Yet, sometimes you do feel bad, or angry, or something else. This isn't bad though. Only when you blame someone for it, create resistance. I used to blame myself for not having the things I thought I needed. This made me feel even worse. Sometimes I hated other for their behaviour, which didn't change a thing except my mood.

Brian, you sound angry, and as a fellow male I think I have experienced the same sort of anger you might experience now. Exercise will work. For instance, release all of your anger by running. Just go to a quiet place, and start to run like hell, not until you're tired, but until you literally drop down of fatigue. I don't know whether this is a good way to release anger in terms of health, but it sure as hell does work on the mental side. Because if you still feel anger, you aren't tired enough, and you should get up and run even further.

You might find all I wrote bullcrap, and I don't blame your for it, but please remember what I said in the beginning, the world is just a reflection of the way you look at it.

All the best!
Erik
Acceptance is the key

Existential depression and Insecurity

Try to keep smiling! :)

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