Having a Hard Time Seeking Help

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New Member

Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 5
   Posted 7/16/2008 5:55 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi, I'm married and a mother of 3. I'm here seeking support.
How do you get the courage up to go to and seek help? I have a hard time talking to anyone, let alone a doctor. I don't know why I'm so scared. Honestly, I find it hard to talk to my husband about being depressed. He's the most loving person, but yet I feel as if I'm letting him down some how!
What have I got to be depressed about? I don't understand it. I cry all the time, let me express ALL the time. I have to shut my door at work at times, because I will just start to cry. I can read something sad, see something sad, or just feel sad. I know this is not normal and that I need help, I'm just afraid to reach out for that help.
Depression runs in my family, I have a long family history of it. Why do I feel like depression is such a bad thing? Millions of people suffer from depression, they just go and get help. Why is seeking help so hard for me?

getting by
Forum Moderator

Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40397
   Posted 7/16/2008 8:06 PM (GMT -6)   
Hi Tigirr,

I think that it is hard for everybody to get help. You always feel like you are the only one, but your'e not. There are many people going through the same thing that you are. I am sure that you will come to realize it the longer that you are here.

Maybe you can write down all your symptoms on a piece of paper and hand it to your doctor. I am sure that would be okay, I write things down all the time to take to my doctor, if I don't, I will forget to mention them. Or just neglect to mention them. I have a difficult time too, as you can see. It seems like when you get there, you are overwhelmed or something and the words don't come out like you wouls like them to.

I am sure that there will be others coming along with advice, but the important thing is to get yourself there. You know that you need something for your moods. And there are all kinds of medications and therapy that you could consider, but you have to get there first. So make that appointment and go, you will be so happy that you did.

Best wishes to you,
hugs, Karen

Oh yes, welcome to HealingWell...
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

Regular Member

Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 363
   Posted 7/17/2008 4:48 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Tigirr,

I found it hard to get help for my depression, but I am really glad that I did. Counselling has been really good for me. At first it was really scary, but now I look forward to going! It is scary - but it's worth conquering your fear so that you can start getting help and start feeling better!
"The Optimist sees the rose and not its thorns; the pessimist stares at the thorns, oblivious of the rose."

Beyond my Control
New Member

Date Joined Jun 2008
Total Posts : 16
   Posted 7/17/2008 5:06 AM (GMT -6)   
Hello Tigrr,

Seeking help is undoubtedly the hardest part for so many of us. I too have a beautiful family, two kids and a loving wife. I felt guilty feeling the way I did, and often hid away not wanting to inflict my pain on my family. However, by masking my inner feelings, actually made me feel worse about myself. We have to remember, as I constantly remind myself, what is happening is beyond our control. You will beat this and be the positive person again.

Stay well, and take care, Stuart (author) Beyond my Control

Veteran Member

Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 7/17/2008 6:40 AM (GMT -6)   

Going to the doctor is scary...but you don't want to feel like this forever right?
It will not be a therapy session,all you need to do is tell them your physical and mental symptons and they then will figure out if you need meds or not.

When and if you decide to go into counseling, it won't be as bad as you think...they don't expect you to tell them everything on the first visit. In fact, the first visit they do alot of the talking and asking you questions. They know that you can't just sit down and tell your whole life story within 5 minutes of entering their office.

You have got to take the first step in getting better,and that is going for help. Once you have taken that step you will be amazed how much better you feel.

We will all be here for you,I am also giving you a link to where you can take a depression survey...you can also print this off and take it to the doctor.

Stay strong, take a deep breath and make that call.


Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia

Please remember,I am not a professional..I am just a person who is also fighting depression.

I know I'm in my own little world, but it's ok. They know me here.

Regular Member

Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 28
   Posted 7/17/2008 7:10 AM (GMT -6)   
Hi Tigrr

I know how hard it is to ask for help or even to try and explain what you are feeling. You feel like you can't get the words out and it is terrifying. But by not asking it just makes your feelings of isolation worse, and something I've learned is that sometimes you have to give others the opportunity to help you. We all need help sometime. So please take care of yourself and start the process, you will be surprised what a little positive action can do for you.
"If you pursue evil with pleasure the pleasure passes away but the evil remains, if you pursue good with labor the good remains and the labor is not wasted."

New Member

Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 5
   Posted 7/17/2008 11:11 AM (GMT -6)   

Thank you, to all of you that have responded to this posting. I have made a promise to myself that I will call and make an appointment this afternoon. I'm really nervous and scared. I hope I can over come this feeling and pick up the phone and make the call.

Thank you for listening.
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