Female, 23, Ulcerative colitis (pancolitis) for 8 years so far; GERD; gastritis; osteopenia in femur head & lumbar spine from long term prednisone use....Current Meds: Lexapro 10mg, Lialda 2 pills a day, Rowasa enemas nightly
Hey there, this is Kitt. I think you listed all the reasons you recognize are wrong with your current situation.
Can you ask yourself these questions:
Are you happy in the relationship? Sit back for a moment and think to yourself 'Am I happy in my relationship?' If you are happy, then great! If you're not happy then you need to ask another question. Ask yourself 'Can I foresee myself ever being happy in this relationship?'
It feels to me like he is not happy either but one of you needs to make the move to talk things out.
I wish you peace and happines but most of all I wish you love.
Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression& GERD Forums*~*
Thank you Karen, your words mean a lot.
It's so hard. I've been sitting here at work all day with red teary eyes and I can't seem to shake it off, everyone's been asking me what's wrong but I know I'll start bawling if I say anything. When we talked last night, he actually cried and told me how much he loves me and worships me and that everything we have here is all he has and it just crushed me, I don't know what to think. Part of me figures even if somehow we did decide to work things out, it would just be worse or at least go back to how it was and things will never get better and it will end up falling through anyway. But then I worry, what if I'm wrong? What if I'm making a huge mistake? What if he really would change and we could have a great life?
Another thing he said that killed me... I was saying to him "If you can't imagine living your life HERE, with me, having kids and getting married, then what's the point?" and he told me this morning that the other night after I said that he "actually felt deep in his heart that he could have a kid with me and he actually thought about waking me up to tell me that". But maybe it's just another guilt trip... And even if it's not, maybe he was just thinking of ways to keep me in which I could not do that, having a baby isn't just going to fix anything. If anything it would just make him resent me and the baby and I'd probably end up alone anyway and a single mom to boot.
Why does life have to be so complicated? And if it's the right thing, why does it hurt so much?
Hey there, I am so sorry you had a bad day but please remember to stop beating yourself up. You are a good person and no one else can take that away from you.
You are at a crossroads, whether to go or whether to stay.The decision to separate is never easy, but you do have options. You need to be able to look at your life as whole and decide if it is good or bad. You also need to look at every possible aspect of your relationship with your partner and see if the good outweighs the bad, or if the bad outweighs the good. Sometimes your judgment is clouded when you only focus on the good or only on the bad. The bottom line is to do what you need to do to have a more fulfilling and happy life.
I wish you peace and happiness but most of all I wish you love.
Keep talking to us.