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TikTok
New Member


Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 9/25/2008 8:25 AM (GMT -7)   
I just found this forum and have read posts. It's good to be here. Although I am very depressed myself, I do not focus on it much. It's just there like a good sweater hanging on the peg, ready to put on when I need it. I'm not on medication, nor seeing a counselor. But I'm needing a plan to leave my partner. I'm in my late 50's, have no job and have been my partners caregiver for 7 years. He is sometimes ambulatory, uses wrist crutches in the apartment and wheelchair for getting to his daily medical appts. We have no vehicle either. He is drinking on top of his pain/depression medications, and I now find him repulsive and intolerable.

Over the years I have developed 3 bulging/herniated discs, DDD, and a crushed groin nerve that leaves one leg sometimes useless, from doing heavy lifting. I have no income of my own. I know this means applying for welfare, then waiting a year for Ont. Disability. I am very resourceful and what is holding me back is my love for my pets. A 9 year old dog especially. How do I find shared accommodation that will allow my dog, where will I store a lifetime of memories, including my adult daughters childhood boxes/memorabilia etc. And I want to leave the community I am in and go to the City where my daughter lives. I have no other family that I can appeal to.

Any resources you know of would be so helpful. Thanks.

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40584
   Posted 9/25/2008 9:30 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Tiktok,

First of all, welcome to the forum. We are so glad that you have joined us.

Second of all, I think that you should talk to a counselor about this, they would be able to help you make these decisions. But I am sure that there will be somebody along to help you with some resources.

What you are doing is a big step. I hope that you have all the support and help that you need with this. Keep posting, like I say, I am sure that there will be somebody coming along with more help than I can give you.

Best wishes,
Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 9/25/2008 10:46 AM (GMT -7)   

 Hi Tiktok

Welcome to HealingWell and the Depression Forum.

I am sorry you are needing a place to live as things have not work out well for you and the person you are providing care to.

I think is very important that you realize you do need to move and start to care for your own health.

You may look in your newspaper for rooms to rent that would take pets.

Otherwise I would check with your local Community Service or perhaps your church.

I hope you keep posting as you will find the members very friendly

Kitt


 

Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
& GERD  Forums
*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources


djdaz_1985
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 2408
   Posted 9/25/2008 11:38 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi there and Welcome to HealingWell,

Firstly I wanted to say what a great person you must be, being the caregiver for your partners parents for 7 years even though it has left you injured. Im not an expert in relationships or US housing as I am a 23 yr old single male from the UK but what I would say is be honest with your partner. I think (women especially) appreciate honesty as that way, everyone knows where they stand.

Please keep coming back to us

Darren
Everyone has a guardian angel. They help pick you up when you fall, comfort you through your times of need and help you appreciate the times when things are going well.
 
"A gold medal is a wonderful thing. But if your not enough without it, you will never be enough with it." - Irvine Blitzer (John Candy) in Cool Runnings
 
Moderator - Epilepsy Forum
Co-Moderator - Depression Forum
 
Help support the forums so we can support you:  http://www.healingwell.com/donate
 


TikTok
New Member


Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 9/26/2008 8:00 PM (GMT -7)   
Thank you all. I just want to point out to the Forum Mod. djdaz_1985 I am NOT caring for my partners parents, but my partner.

So far I now have a social worker that will see me separately to develop a plan. First appt. next week. Then she wants to see us as a couple. Which is fine, if it helps him ease into this new situation. I've been told it may take as long as 5 months to get it workable. Since I am very pro-active I find this a bit sloth-like, but am willing to find out. My biggest concern, as I've seen on other threads, is I"m worried about his suicide ideation.

Thanks again people, so glad I found this site.

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 9/27/2008 2:51 AM (GMT -7)   

Tik Tok,

I am so glad you have a social worker now. If it takes five months make them positive months. Look as this a major change in your life and picture yourself in a new setting.

I am very glad you found HealingWell as I am sure you will receive gentle caring support from the members.

Take care and keep talking to us.

Kitt

 



 

Kitt, Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
& GERD  Forums
*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources


djdaz_1985
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 2408
   Posted 9/27/2008 3:40 AM (GMT -7)   
Hiya,

Firstly I want to appologise for mis-reading your post. I did go back and re-read it and its pretty clear! lol So appologies there.

I am glad that you have got the ball rolling with the social worker and you are starting to put a plan into place. 5 months is not that long in the grand scheme of things and it will probably fly by although I can appreciate what you mean about it being sloth-like as I can be very impatient sometimes!

Darren
Everyone has a guardian angel. They help pick you up when you fall, comfort you through your times of need and help you appreciate the times when things are going well.
 
"A gold medal is a wonderful thing. But if your not enough without it, you will never be enough with it." - Irvine Blitzer (John Candy) in Cool Runnings
 
Moderator - Epilepsy Forum
Co-Moderator - Depression Forum
 
Help support the forums so we can support you:  http://www.healingwell.com/donate
 

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