I feel you are reaching out to us. I am sorry that I had to delete some stuff on your posts, but we are not to talk about suicide. At least not threaten it. I wish that you would post a little more so we can read about what you are going through. I just lost my nephew to suicide, so I don't take this lightly. You need to talk so somebody and soon. I will get you some resources with websites and numbers that you can get ahold of.
National Suicide Hotline
This is a combined network of the Amerian Association of Suicidology, the National Hopeline Network, CONTACT USA, and many other organizations. Call are automatically routed to the nearest crisis center to the phone from which the call for help is placed.
Helpful Web Sites:
Suicide Hotlines (listed by state)
Suicidal.com (includes Suicide Crisis Center and Depression and Suicide)