Sadness coming and going in waves

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Aurora60
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 1249
   Posted 10/14/2008 5:26 PM (GMT -7)   
Well, yesterday I had to go to the vet's office to pick up Rusty's ashes.  My son drove me.  I couldn't even talk when I went in.  The receptionist (who knows me!) said can I help you and all I could do was mouth the name Rusty.  Another girl helped me and she was very kind and understanding. She talked to me and told me it would take some time to feel better. She also told me to give my other dog at home lots of attention as he too feels the emptiiness.  He knows Rusty is no longer here.  They gave me back the towel I had wrapped Rusty in and my other dog just kept sniffing and sniffing the towel.  He sure knew Rusty's scent.  I put the towel in the basement. It was so sad looking at the urn and knowing my baby was in there.  The urn is very nice and it had a beautiful poem and a sympathy note from the pet cremation owners.  I have times when I accept it so well and other days when i'm not so good.  I guess I am down now because I just had my surgery last week so have been home for the past 5 or so days. Surgery was successful and no malignancies thanks be to God.  I have to see a 2nd lung specialist in 2 weeks so I hope he can figure out what my problem is.  I have to admit that since Rusty is gone and the house thoroughly cleaned that I am breathing easier. Just hope i'm not allergic to my other dog as I am certainly not giving him up.  Well, I just needed to get my feelings out - it helps to write it all out.  Thanks for understanding. I'm just sad.
 
Aurora

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40568
   Posted 10/14/2008 6:23 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Aurora,

We certainly understand your sense of loss. And it does take time to get over it. Especially when youv'e had your loving pet for such a long time. They do become part of the family. The reason I am here right now is because mine is so selfishly laying in my chair.LOL...She sneaks up there whenever she gets the chance, but she hasn't been feeling the best so I decided to let her have it and come on here.

Know that it will take time for you to get over Rusty and that is okay. It is normal. You were very close to him and this is to be expected. Soon you will remember all of the fond memories and be able to smile. But until then embrace your feelings and know that your grieving will take it's course.

Hugs to you,
Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


deb52
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 27
   Posted 10/15/2008 4:35 AM (GMT -7)   
I too lost our family pet golden retriever this past May. She was 15 years old and our sons first and only pet. It was so hard to see her go, but by this time she had diabetes for several years and it was getting so hard for her to take her walks that she loved so much. There is not a day that I don't think of her----either something I see to remind me of her or just remembering how she would react in a certain situation. Although her loss still saddens me, I am beginning to smile more when I think of her. She will always remain close to my heart and her memories now give me a moment of happiness as I am dealing with the clinical depression of my husband and its fallout effects on him and the entire family.

Best wishes to you and yours----they say time heals---or at least softens the ache

Debbie

djdaz_1985
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 2408
   Posted 10/15/2008 7:13 AM (GMT -7)   
I can completely understand where you are coming from. I lost 2 family dogs within a 6mths / 1 year of each other. It is a terrible feeling of emptiness and sadness because you remember the good times you had. I can tell you that it does get easier as time goes on. It took me about 6 months to get used to the idea. The last dog we lost was cremated and she will have her ashes scattered in a special place in Scotland, UK (When my mum eventually goes!). Right now she sits in a casket on the front room table and every time I return from Uni, I always make sure I say hello.

I guess the moral to the story is that time is a wonderful healer.

Darren
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stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 10/16/2008 10:31 AM (GMT -7)   

Hey Aurora

Hello my friend.  I know this is all new to you and my dogs ashes came in a lovely urn through the mail.  So it was a surprise and I had no time to anticipate going to pick them up.

It has been  almost a year now and even thow I have one sweet dog left, my Pdoc suggested I get a puppy.  I told my husband and he said to ask if she will pay for the dog food.......... devil

My daughter has a dog due to have a litter on Halloween.  Perhaps after she gets it all trained I can barter with her for one.  She raises show dogs but sometimes she has Dobies that go to famlies.  So we will see.

I am with you in spirit my friend.

Hugs
Kitt


Aurora60
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2006
Total Posts : 1249
   Posted 10/16/2008 1:54 PM (GMT -7)   

Thanks all my friends for being so kind and understanding.  Now that everything is over it has sunk in and now I just need the time to heal.  I am feeling better about the dog, I know it was best and I am at peace with it.  And having my surgery behind me and no problems is a big relief.  Now if only I can solve the breathing I will be very content.  Life seems to be improving and i'm just taking 1 day at a time.  Hope you are all doing OK and take good care.

Many hugs,

Aurora


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 10/16/2008 2:06 PM (GMT -7)   
Aurora60
 
Your post warms my heart to know you are feeling better.  Now lets get the breathing figured out and you will befeeling on top of the world.  You have my friendship so know I am here.
Hugs
Kitt
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