New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
[ << Previous Thread | Next Thread >> ]

TaraAnne
New Member


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 9
   Posted 11/2/2008 2:13 PM (GMT -7)   
I don't know what to do anymore..i cry everyngiht, i dont even rrmember wat its liek to be truly happy anymore.
I wish i had a real mom, tha didnt hit me..i cant even rmemeber the last time she said she loved me, or even jus gave me a hug..everythings been goign wrong latly, and i cant take it anymore, i feel like im losing myself
about a month ago i got a abortion..it torn me apart, but i couldnt provide for the child if i kept it..then i started doiing drugs, and drinkign more regulary..my friends all left me, didnt liek wat i was doing, i feel so alone..with no one to talk to
help me sad sad sad

Post Edited (TaraAnne) : 11/2/2008 2:24:43 PM (GMT-7)


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40583
   Posted 11/2/2008 2:23 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi TaraAnne,

Welcome to the HealingWell Depression forum. I am so happy that you have joined us today. There is a wonderful group of caring and giving people here and I think we could benefit you.

First of all, have you told your mom how you feel? She wont know unless you tell her. I am sure that she loves you. Does she have to work? That can be so taxing in itself that she doesn't have a chance to show you. I know that isn't an excuse. My mother was the same. She never reinforced the feeling of being truly loved. But I am sure that your mom does love you.

Maybe you could sit down and talk with her. Let her know that you need to hear the words from her. Tell her that you want and need a hug. I bet that she will. She probably doesn't even realize how you feel.

Let us know what is going on, we truly care about you.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


TaraAnne
New Member


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 9
   Posted 11/2/2008 2:28 PM (GMT -7)   
I have talked to her, i wrote her a letter, i found it was the best way to get out everything, then it seemed like it last a month, not even that she was being nice, and actualyl loviing and caring..then it all went away, everythign went back to normal..and just so much stuff is goign on in my life, and i see ppl talk to their moms bout everything, then their i am, scared to even talk to my mom..it kills me

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40583
   Posted 11/2/2008 2:45 PM (GMT -7)   
Do you have somebody else in the family that you can talk to? Let your mom know that you need to talk once in a while. What about a school counselor? I take it that you are in school. I couldn't talk to my mom, but I could talk to my grandmother. That helped some.

I do unedrstand how you feel. It does hurt when you can't communicate with your mom. But I never could either. It was like she was the enemy at some points. Whe was very strict. You have to learn to love yourself, and really that is all that matters. I know you want to be close to her. But you have to keep reminding her of that.

Bless you sweetie,

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


TaraAnne
New Member


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 9
   Posted 11/2/2008 2:57 PM (GMT -7)   
The only person i really talk to is my boyfriend, but i feel like i drag him down with me..he does help me thro alot, but he shouldnt have to take everythign on his shoulders..thats why i looked up this website..and well already i feel a lil better knoing i have someone else to talk to, and i am in grade 11, its so stressful..i dont kno wat i want to do with my life, i hate being at home, and it jus seems like everything that could possibly go wrong is goign wrong..and i dotn kno how to cope with it all. And when you say i have to love myself, thats one thing latly ive been having troubles with, it seems liek everytime i look in the mirror i pick myself apart, i look at every detail i dont like..and i jus cant stand it..i use to always jus look for the happy things in life, now eveythings different. Ive been rushed to the hospital 2 times in the last month from panic attack, they doctor perscribed me a medication, but i didnt get it, i dotn belive in that kind of stuff. Its just, i hate feelign this way, and it keeps getting worse and worse. I want to just move out of my house, and be by myself away from everything, but i jus lost my job not long ago so i have no money to do anything..i feel like its jus never guna end

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40583
   Posted 11/2/2008 3:11 PM (GMT -7)   
Sweetie,

You can't be looking in the mirror when you are in a down mood. That is all you will see is negativity. You are a special, sweet, kind person. You deserve to love yourself. Your boyfriend loves you for who you are. We love you for who you are, but you loving you is what matters.

You sound to be a lot stronger than you think also. I can tell. you are wise for your years. I think that you should listen to the doctor and try your medication. Most all of us are on medications. I am on three different ones, and without them I would be a wreck. I don't like to take them either, but I have to. And just because you have to try them, doesn't mean you will always have to take them. Sometimte you get better and then you don't need them anymore. So give that some thought and let us know what you are going to do.

I am happy that you are starting to feel better.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


mom9mom
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 489
   Posted 11/2/2008 3:30 PM (GMT -7)   
You need help from your DR. to deal with the depression.Please go to your DR. right away.Almost every one that gets a abortion ends up dealing with depression at some point in there life because of it.I also hope that you are using birth control after this has happened.Remember that you should also be worring about STD`s as well as pregnantses.You are almost a aduilt so just try to hange on for a little bit longer.You will be out of school soon then it will be up to you if you are going to get a job or go to collage once you are out of the house your mom might be able to show her love more because she wont have as much responsabelaty.Please give the med`s a chance to work you say that you dont beleave in it but ask yourself if you want to keep on going to the hospital.What med`s are thay giving you in the hospital?Do you feel better after you go to the hospital?If I had went to my DR. last winter to get on some anti-depressent med`s I would not have the medical problams that I have today.Because I hurt myself I now have life long medical issues that I have to live with every day and all of that could have been avoided if I would have dealt with my depression.so I am asking you to please please give it a try.Remember that there are alot of med`s and that it sometimes takes a while to find the right one for you.It also sounds like you really need some kind of counsaling or a support group try to find one.GOOD LUCK.
Lost half of my small intestine.Ilieostomy for 5 months then reverst,Nerve damage to right leg,part of my right hip bone removed,Cronic pain,hernia,infection in my back called discites,and depression.Mother to 9 kids 7 boys 2 girls and 1 stepson.4 grandsons,9 grandaughters.4 of my grandkids I inherited from my twin sister who passed away 6 1/2 years ago from a blood clot after surgery.God has given me my life back after I almost lost it.Even though its a painful and sometimes hard road to walk I take it one step at a time and give thanks to god for every step I take.


TaraAnne
New Member


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 9
   Posted 11/2/2008 3:34 PM (GMT -7)   
Thanks,
But im just scared with taking medication cause ive herd so many stories how ppl get hooked on them, and become dependant..and i dont want that to happen to me
i dont kno if wat i hear is true tho,
I wish i had a consellor..or someone liek that..its jsut i dont know how to go about gettin one..i dont like ppl around me knoing that im depressed, i hide it from everyone. so its not like i can jus ask ppl, hwo could i go about getting one?

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 11/2/2008 4:53 PM (GMT -7)   

Hello Tara Ann

Welcome to HealingWell.  I am so sorry your life is in an uproar right now but I agree you need a counselor and your best person to talk with first would be your physician.  They usually have the info on group counselors and therapy options.

You posted "then i started doiing drugs, and drinkign more regulary."  Have you stopped this behavior.  If you were doing drugs and your afraid to take physician prescribed meds that may help you, I feel it would be in your best interest to talk with your Doctor and be honest.

Also you Mom is abusing you.  That is not right, do you have a counselor at school you can talk to.

I know when your down it is hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel and accept that you must love yourself first but I believe in you so please believe in yourself.

Gentle Hugs to you

Kitt


 

Kitt, Co-Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
& GERD  Forums
*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
It is health that is real wealth and not pieces of gold and silver.~Mahatma Gandhi~
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources


olderwomenrule15
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 29
   Posted 11/2/2008 5:04 PM (GMT -7)   
Antidepressants are not addictive. It does sound as if they would help you, but you cannot drink alcohol while on them. Do some research on the meds available for depression and go to the doctor and explain how you feel. I, too, am depressed, but my meds make the days tolerable. I have a long way to go, but I am determined to beat this darn depression!

Keep posting and you will hear from many good and kind people.

Linda

TaraAnne
New Member


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 9
   Posted 11/2/2008 5:29 PM (GMT -7)   
Ive stopped doing drugs..i still drink sometimes..i know its not good, but it jus takes it all away for a lil while..and i currently dont have a doctor..who can i talk to instead?
and thanks everyone who has gave me advice..i came on this website wanting someone to talk to, and i got more then i thoguth, i got a few ppl, and your all so kind and helpful, jus want to thank you.
and its also good hearing from ppl who i can relate to, instead of talkign to my boyfriend who cant really relatee to wats happening to me. In my high school we dont have councellors all the time, and im not sure how to find out when they do come, or how to make an appointment but i am goign to look into that

mom9mom
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 489
   Posted 11/2/2008 10:31 PM (GMT -7)   
I dont know what state you are in but I think most have a distict health department.Thay sould be able to get some info on councelers.If you have a church thay have self help groups most of the time.Even the juvanile probation office usually has a bulatin board that has a list of communaty help that is avelable.If you dont have aDR. its time to shop for one.Where did you have your abortion?Thay should be able to give you a refural.I hope you find some help soon.
Lost half of my small intestine.Ilieostomy for 5 months then reverst,Nerve damage to right leg,part of my right hip bone removed,Cronic pain,hernia,infection in my back called discites,and depression.Mother to 9 kids 7 boys 2 girls and 1 stepson.4 grandsons,9 grandaughters.4 of my grandkids I inherited from my twin sister who passed away 6 1/2 years ago from a blood clot after surgery.God has given me my life back after I almost lost it.Even though its a painful and sometimes hard road to walk I take it one step at a time and give thanks to god for every step I take.


TaraAnne
New Member


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 9
   Posted 11/3/2008 5:17 PM (GMT -7)   
Im from Ontario, Canada..and health department sounds liek a good start thanks,
and i have been lookign for a doctor, except here theres a MAJOR shortage more then half our population has no doctor...i had my abortion in toronto, which is a 2 hours away from where i live..it was the closest place to me.

blingbabed123
New Member


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 11/3/2008 8:07 PM (GMT -7)   

Hi and welcome,

I made you a thread of your own so everyone would see it.  I titled it with your name.

Thanks
Kitt

Post Edited By Moderator (stkitt) : 11/5/2008 9:32:09 AM (GMT-7)


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40583
   Posted 11/4/2008 6:08 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Blingbabed,

First of all I would like to welcome you to the forum. You have come to a really good place. There are many wonderful members here that are so caring and compassionate. I am sure that you will be glad that you joined.

Keep your daughter's best interest at heart and you can never go wrong. She is a new special child in your life and she should be most important to you. I believe that she is. It sounds like you really love her a lot.

By the sound of it, your ex has a lot of growing up to do. I wouldn't worry about getting him back in your life. It sounds like he might not be worth trusting. I don't know if it would be good to have him in your life right now. But that is just my opinion. You deserve a man who loves you and your baby. Not someone that is out with others all of the time.

Just keep trying, this will blow over and you will be back to feeling secure with your daughter. She is innocent in all of this, so like I said, Keep her best interest at heart. And I promise you everything will work out. Eventually you will meet a good man who loves you and your daughter. Just look at her, she is beautiful.

Best wishes, keep posting, we are here for you.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


TaraAnne
New Member


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 9
   Posted 11/4/2008 8:05 PM (GMT -7)   
I talked to the secertary at my school today, she arranged me a appointment for a councellor on thursday..Kinda nervous but also happy to finally maybe get stuff sorted out..and hopefully be happy again soon..ill keep you posted how everything works out..
and well, thanks for being there and having someone to talk to getting by, mom9mom, olderwomenrule15, and stkitt..I think thats everyone, your all great ppl..and jus thanks..i love the feeling knowing if im down and lonely i can coem on here, and hear so many kind words and advice..
thanks
<3 xo

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40583
   Posted 11/5/2008 8:48 AM (GMT -7)   
TaraAnne,

I am so happy for you. I think that you will find that counseling really helps. Keep up the good work.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 11/5/2008 9:25 AM (GMT -7)   

Way to Go Tara............I am so proud of you.  Remember you have all of us to support you.

Keep talking to us and know you  are a wonderful and worthy person.

Kitt


mom9mom
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 489
   Posted 11/6/2008 12:38 AM (GMT -7)   
smilewinkgrin   smilewinkgrin smilewinkgrin smilewinkgrin Please give yourself a great big hug from me to you for making a appointment with the councellors.Please remember that it takes some time and dont give up.There will always be someone to talk to here so good luck and keep on posting even if its just to talk. smilewinkgrin smilewinkgrin smilewinkgrin smilewinkgrin
Lost half of my small intestine.Ilieostomy for 5 months then reverst,Nerve damage to right leg,part of my right hip bone removed,Cronic pain,hernia,infection in my back called discites,and depression.Mother to 9 kids 7 boys 2 girls and 1 stepson.4 grandsons,9 grandaughters.4 of my grandkids I inherited from my twin sister who passed away 6 1/2 years ago from a blood clot after surgery.God has given me my life back after I almost lost it.Even though its a painful and sometimes hard road to walk I take it one step at a time and give thanks to god for every step I take.


TaraAnne
New Member


Date Joined Nov 2008
Total Posts : 9
   Posted 11/11/2008 5:04 PM (GMT -7)   
Well, i havent posted in a while, i did go to the councellor, she helped alott..made me feel better jus being able to vent everything thats gogin on in my head.. but im still workin on it..Ive been really busy with job interviews, so hopefulyl somtiem soon ill get hired, and be able to get some money to move away for a bit and have a relaxing vacation, i feel it would help a great deal.
well, ill keep u guys updated..i finally have hope that everythings guna turn good sometime,
so hopefully ill be able to share my happieness sometime in the future
thanks agian everyoone

love tara
xoxo

Knight
Regular Member


Date Joined Jan 2005
Total Posts : 352
   Posted 11/13/2008 7:41 PM (GMT -7)   
Tara,
 
Wanted to offer support to you.  Sometimes the road seems all uphill.  Be strong and keep moving forward.  Remember that you can ask for help when you need help.  I'm glad things are looking up for you.  Have a smile.  They are nice.
turn  
Knight
 
Mild to Moderate Left Side UC since 10/2002, Joint Pain since 10/2004
 
Strict SCD 7/2004-12/2005
Prednisone 8/2004-10/2004
Remission since 9/2004
Daily Meds:
 1500 mg Pentasa, 150 mg Zoloft, 30 mg Baclofen, 10 mg Ambien

New Topic Post Reply Printable Version
Forum Information
Currently it is Wednesday, December 07, 2016 1:50 AM (GMT -7)
There are a total of 2,733,979 posts in 301,164 threads.
View Active Threads


Who's Online
This forum has 151298 registered members. Please welcome our newest member, FrankByMonster.
207 Guest(s), 3 Registered Member(s) are currently online.  Details
THE HAPPY TURTLE, Stanislav, Stetsonva


Follow HealingWell.com on Facebook  Follow HealingWell.com on Twitter  Follow HealingWell.com on Pinterest
Advertisement
Advertisement

©1996-2016 HealingWell.com LLC  All rights reserved.

Advertise | Privacy Policy & Disclaimer