I'm new to this forum. Just registered today, actually.
I don't know if it'll make any difference at all, but I decided to give it a try. My name is Emily and I've had depression since I was nine years old. I'm almost fifteen now and, like most things, it's gotten harder with time. My father thinks I've just been 'acting this way' to get attention. My mother thinks that she understands. She throws stories at me about how she went to group therapy and how it really helped. But I can't seem to connect with her. Whenever she tries to talk to me, it's too weird. I have problems with insomnia most nights. I won't go to bed until four in the morning in some cases. I cry for hours, even when nothing's really the matter.
I have the most amazing friends, one of which has the same problem as I do. And we talk about it sometimes. And I feel better after we do. It's not weird talking to her like it is with my mother. But there are days when she isn't having such a bad day and I am and I would feel guilty bringing it up because it would ruin one of her rare happy days.
Nothing just ever seems to be enough. And I don't think it will ever be. The people who talk with me about this make me feel guilty, telling me that other people have it much, much worse and it's not right for me to feel this way. But I can't stop feeling this way.
I might make a fool of myself by posting this. Maybe people will laugh at me for throwing myself out there. But I guess I have to try.
Edit: Sorry I had to edit your post for content.
1. No discussion of any illegal activity or threats of violence. (ie. illicit drug use, including medical marijuana use, threats of suicide or self-injury, or threatened or intended physical harm). Discussions of suicide or self-harm that are deemed negative and therefore potentially injurious to others are also not permitted.
Thank you for your understanding.
Post Edited By Moderator (stkitt) : 12/22/2008 4:18:20 PM (GMT-7)