Family found out im in therapy. Very mad.

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Taryn50894
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 108
   Posted 12/23/2008 3:06 PM (GMT -7)   
My father just found out today that I've been going to therapy. I was forced to tell him, because he had to drop me off. Now he's all stressed out over it because he thinks I'm going to commit suicide, which I wouldn't. I dont want him to think that but now he does. Now my family is mad because I'm going to therapy. Theyre all worried but I'm taking care of myself so what for?
 
I just wish that I could go to therapy and help myself get better so I can live a happier life, without everyone thinking I'm crazy or going to harm myself. It's like me going to therapy is a burden on them that they have to worry about now. Why can't I just keep doing what's working for me and everyone can not panic over it?
 
So confused. I dont even know how to handle my family.

Red09
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2003
Total Posts : 424
   Posted 12/23/2008 3:45 PM (GMT -7)   
Not sure how old you are, but this is your life, not your parents life! Just tell them to chill out, that you're doing counselling to FIX yourself, not harm yourself. Make a joke of it and tell them they can either support you and be pleased you're working on you, or they can stay out of your buisness.

Talk to your therapist about your family's reaction about you and counselling. Hopefully your therapist will have more suggestions. Please dont let your family ruin your recovery!


mom9mom
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Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 489
   Posted 12/23/2008 4:30 PM (GMT -7)   
Why are your family worried?I would think that thay would be happy that you are not hidding from the depression(That is what a lot of us did for a long time)That is not health.All of us on this forum are proud of you for getting the help you need.Do not worry to much about them just take care of you.
Lost half of my small intestineJan.2008.Ilieostomy for 5 months then reverst in June 2008,Nerve damage to right leg,part of my right hip bone removed Jan. 2008,Cronic pain,hernia,infection in my back called discites,and depression.Gallbladder removed Nov,2008.Mother to 9 kids 7 boys 2 girls and 1 stepson.4 grandsons,9 grandaughters.4 of my grandkids I inherited from my twin sister who passed away 6 1/2 years ago from a blood clot after surgery.God has given me my life back after I almost lost it.Even though its a painful and sometimes hard road to walk I take it one step at a time and give thanks to god for every step I take.


jujub
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Date Joined Mar 2003
Total Posts : 10391
   Posted 12/23/2008 5:08 PM (GMT -7)   

Taryn, sometimes families worry that we'll talk about them in therapy, and are afraid they'll look like "bad" parents. You might sit down and talk with your family members either individually or as a group. Explain that you're in therapy to help yourself deal with life in a more positive way, and that you're there to talk about your own feelings and reactions but not about others issues.

If they feel reassured that they're not going to be "blamed" (and that you don't blame them), they may be able to respond in a more positive and supportive manner. Good luck, dear.


getting by
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Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40571
   Posted 12/23/2008 5:18 PM (GMT -7)   
I think that you have gotten some very good advice. I would run with it! Taking care of you is the main thing, you can't worry about what others think at a time like this.

Keep going to therapy, keep helping yourself.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


olderwomenrule15
Regular Member


Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 29
   Posted 12/23/2008 6:35 PM (GMT -7)   
Please keep going to see your therapist. No one understands depression unless they have experienced it. My therapist has been depressed twice in his life and he "gets" me. My family is thrilled that I go to see him on a regular basis!

Be brave and stand up for your rights!

Take care,
Linda

stkitt
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Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 12/23/2008 10:03 PM (GMT -7)   

You have receive great advice.  Try sitting down with your family and calmly explain the therapy is helpful for you and you plan to continue to go.  You are being very responsible for going on your own.

Kudos to you for taking control of your life.

Hugs

Kitt


 

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Mazfire
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Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 1683
   Posted 12/23/2008 11:21 PM (GMT -7)   

i have to agree with the input of others- you should be commended for taking yourself to therapy and getting the help you feel you need. maybe your family are concerned about the 'social stigma' and dont want to be seen as having a 'crazy' person (which you are NOT) in the family. calmly and politely explain your reasons to them, unless you dont feel you need to justify your choices to them.

good luck, keep going to therapy and be proud that you are doing the right thing!

Maz XX


            'He heals the broken hearted and binds up their wounds.' (Psalm 147:3)                  
 
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Akram
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Date Joined Feb 2005
Total Posts : 616
   Posted 12/24/2008 10:21 AM (GMT -7)   
welcome to the forum Taryn50894, and as others said your on the right track, don't let them confuse you, this is just the typical re-action from the people who don't understand what is depression and how to fight it, all what your doing is fighting your depression, it's better than holding everything inside isn't it? try and reach out to your parents and make sure they understand what is depression and maybe you can suggest for them some books to read to understand what you are going through, talk to your therapist I'm sure he can suggest some good books to read.
                                                     To be or not to Be


Taryn50894
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2008
Total Posts : 108
   Posted 12/26/2008 10:51 PM (GMT -7)   
Well I think that my parents are probably just embarrassed that they have a daughter in counseling.
My mother does know absolutely nothing from the looks of it about therapy and/or depression and/or anxiety and even if I tried to explain it to her it would be too hard because it's too emotional. She wouldn't understand either.

I'm just not sure about this anymore. I have to decide within the week if I'm going to schedule another appointment, so we'll see I guess. I appreciate everyone's advice. I'll definetly have to think about it.

I feel ike I can't even handle all this anymore, and now everyone elses emotions are involved to its twice as hard.

djdaz_1985
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jan 2006
Total Posts : 2408
   Posted 12/27/2008 1:55 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Taryn,

I think you are being very mature and responsible about the whole situation. It would be a shame to see the progress you have made during your councilling sessions go to waste because of your parents. Have you tried talking this through with them honestly? I know you say it would be hard and that your mum might not understand but perhaps it is worth trying?

Darren
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