Happy New Year Kitt, and everyone here
Losing my youngest son has been THE impact of all impacts for me and my family. It changed me forever of course, and the things that used to depress me or cause me anxiety no longer exist. I learned that there is nothing that will phaze me anymore. I used to suffer from anxiety and depression, and now, just the anxiety from losing him, and watching his brothers grieve. I no longer use the term depression in regards to how I feel, for it isnt depression, it is profound sorrow. I think that when one goes through the loss of someone very close to you, it changes your outlook on everything. You no longer feel sad for yourself, for me..it's the "what might have been" what he, and our family is missing. I dont dwell on it so much now, because I would never have been able to function at all, and that would have been so much harder for my family.
For my son, I am trying to hold my head up, and move forward, (for my surviving sons as well) I can face almost anything now.