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jessy09
New Member


Date Joined Feb 2009
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 2/2/2009 10:54 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi all
 
well im new here, i just needed to come to a place were i chat. Everybody thinks im suppose to be the luckest women in the world, i have a husband who loves me dearlly and our first child is on its way. but i just never seem to be happy, i had a really bad childhood, a family member tried to kill me 2 times, im not aloud to talk to anybody i know about my life, because if i do there will be hell like no other, so basically everyday i put on a smile and pretend like nothing is bothering me, but inside im so scared, and angry and just all emotions are being mixed together.  my whole life i have to shut up about what happend to me when i was little, my husband doesnt even know everything, he just doesnt understand what im going through, and i cant talk to him about it. at the moment it feels like everything has been falling apart im not aloud to work because i had too much issues in my pregnancy, we have to move out of our house by the end of the month, and we just cant seem to find a place to live. me and my husband is fighting all the time, i cant even remember when the last time was we had sex, well thats my fault, i hate sex. and with me almost loosing my baby i just dont want to have any, im scared, but he doesnt see it my way. im so stressed because im scared of the fact that i wont be a good mommy. on the other hand my parents is putting so much pressure on me to find work for dad, and when i tell them i cant, they get mad at me and stop talking to me. they make me feel like i have to do everything for them, me and my sisters dont speak anymore, because i wont give them money. im just so sick emotionally, people get so mad at me if i dont do what they ask. my parents let me get move in with my husband at age 17 and they let me get married at 19, im mad at them for what they have done to mess up my life so much.
 
well this is me in a few sentenses.
 

stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 2/3/2009 8:26 AM (GMT -7)   

jessy09

Welcome to HealingWell and the Depression Forum.

I am sorry you are going through a bad time and I know you will find the members in this forum supportive and caring.

It sounds to me like you have some PTSD issues going on as well as depression too.  Do you have a Physchiatrist or are you in therapy.  I know with a babe on the way meds need to be monitored very carefully but I would certainly be talking with your physician about how you are feeling.

This should be a happy and exciting time in your life.  May I suggest you make an appointment, write down all you want to talk about and see what your physician has to offer you.

I am not a professional but I do hate to hear you feeling so awful.

As far as the family dumping on you,  let go of them for now and take care of yourself and your unborn baby.

Your hormones are probably all over the place too...........

Hugs to you sweetie,
Kitt


 

Kitt, Co-Moderator: Anxiety/Panic & Depression
&  Moderator GERD  Forums

*~*
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
Not a mental health professional of any kind
Peace does not dwell in outward things, but within the soul
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40576
   Posted 2/3/2009 9:25 AM (GMT -7)   
Remember when family members, or anybody for that matter, get mad at you like that, it is their problem, not yours. So try to ignore it for now. You are a wonderful person, so don't let them get you down.

I agree with Kitt, you might have some ptsd going on right now. And talking to a professional will help. also we are here for you and care about you.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


jessy09
New Member


Date Joined Feb 2009
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 2/3/2009 4:08 PM (GMT -7)   
thanks ladies. i was in therapy before i got pregnant and for the first 6 weeks of my pregnancy, but we moved and here is really no one i can talk to now. the doctors told me they cant do anything for me because of the risks i have been having with this pregnancy, they just tell me to wait it out untill my little one is here. its really hard somedays.

getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40576
   Posted 2/3/2009 4:19 PM (GMT -7)   
Remember that you can always come here and talk to us. We are here for you.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies

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