I think sending the flowers was a good thing, and if she feels emotional about the gift, that is good as she is feeling.
I never was in a position where I did not love my husband or family, in fact I cried and begged them to stay with me, literally. Just sit with me when I could not sleep at night or just listen to me pour out my feelings of fear of never recovering.
Remember that each person's journey through depression is unique.
I am proud of you for giving her support and knowing that this is an illness and not a personal attack on you. You are one of the good people in this world.
You are right, in the end you will come out stronger. I know how hard it is to be the husband of a depressed wife...........I have watched my husband and he has his breaks where he will just yell at me in frustration. I understand how he feels as I hate it when I am feeling down and crying. He "doesn't know what to do to help me" he will say and I know he doesn't, no one has the answer.
I do know that acceptance of your own depression and anxiety is now the key for me. I have been fighting against it for 26 years until I read a post yesterday that hit me square between the eyes.
I am working on accepting that I have depression, I will always have depression but I will not let it stop me from living a good life. I have prayed for it to go away...........no dice it is here to stay and the harder I struggle and cry about it the worse I feel so I am now going to just have to admit this is me. There is no old me only this one that is alive and well today.
I hope that getting your wife into counseling helps her and she finds some ways to cope with her depression. I hope it goes away or is under control and not ruling her life for much longer and I wish you peace.
Post Edited (Howlyncat) : 3/23/2009 4:47:32 PM (GMT-6)