I’m really glad you checked in. I was worried when I didn’t hear from you again on your Serious Panic thread…..I had a feeling you must be struggling, and didn’t know quite what to do to help. I’m so sorry you’ve been feeling sad and depressed. I know how it is to feel that life holds no joy…….and it’s tough to keep moving forward despite those feelings. At the risk of repeating myself here, is it helping at all to break things down into smaller, more manageable steps? How are things going with those classes? Last time we talked, you had just had a problem with your lost files…..you said something about it being too late, even though you found a way to recover your work. I hope your professors were understanding about that!
I don’t mean to be redundant here, but have you thought about talking to a counselor about your struggles? Is there a resource at school where you could get a confidential sounding board? When I was doing my undergrad, I went to the student counseling centre in my final year and was able to speak with someone about my concerns. It’s a tough year, trying to get ready to move forward after graduation and all. I will stress to you, right now, that you don’t have to have all the answers right away. You probably know this already, but lots of folks end up doing things that are quite far removed from their field of study in school. I don’t know how much of ‘the plan for the future’ is part of your sense of overwhelm right now, but trust me…..you WILL have the time and the opportunity to test your wings in different ways.
In the meantime, are there certain things about school and work – specific issues – that are weighing on you? I want so much to understand and help, if there is anything I can do.
(Incidentally, thanks for calling me 'babe'.....at my age, I don't hear it that often!)
Hey, I can understand about the moving back home thing……I had to do the same after I’d been out on my own for seven years. I was between jobs at the time, and although I’ll admit it wasn’t easy, it WAS temporary! And it will be for you, too. Try to remember that….it’ll make it more bearable. In the meantime, try not to think about it ahead of time if at all possible. One day at a time, and each thing as it comes!
Okay, the motivation dilemma. When I have a lot of work to tackle, and it’s the last thing I want to do, here’s the game I play to break it down: it may sound silly, but I use the ol’ egg timer method. I set a timer for a certain amount of time (if I’m in dire straits, I might make it 15-20 mins to start) and I make an agreement with myself that I will work on whatever the project is until the timer goes off, and then I am allowed to take a break. I often surprise myself into doing more than the prescribed 15-20 mins, as it’s often the case that getting started is the toughest part. Knowing that I’m only committed to a short period of time seems to make it less overwhelming. Keep going, if you can, for as many timer periods as you’re able. Let’s face it, even 20 minutes of something is MUCH better than nothing! You’ll be surprised, I think, how much better you will feel just getting a start on something.
I don’t know if you will recall, but Megan (in her reply to you on the Serious Panic thread) asked if maybe you could put off the job search until you get in a better place with school assignments. Is this a possibility?
I’m not sure what kind of job you have now, but handling constructive criticism can be a challenge for all of us. Can you give an example of what you’re dealing with in that regard?
Sorry the weekend didn’t turn out as planned/hoped, but I’m glad you’re going to a study session. Excellent plan! Let me know how that goes.
I don’t feel like the best one to give you advice on the financial dilemma, but maybe someone else will have some suggestions!
Things aren’t too great for me right now, as I just got back from an out of town visit to my brother’s place. To put it in a nutshell, he has the same out of control temper that our father had while we were growing up, and when I saw him unleashing it on his kids today, I took him aside and told him I thought he was overreacting, and to please not scream at the kids. Well, you can imagine how that went! I was cursed out and thrown out of his home. Another delightful, Waltons-esque moment in the Raniah family.
I’ll pray for both of us to be able to cope this evening. I hope your studying goes well and makes you feel less anxious about your test. Keep me posted.
Sorry to hear you are feeling so down and please do take Riniah's advice about a counselor.
about the word babe, I am glad it makes Riniah feel young again but to me it would feel like I was called me a wench or a chickie.......... but then I am a biker lady..............lol.
I could not resist giving you a bit of teasing there.............Laughter is good medicine so please do try to find things you enjoy doing. Watch a silly movie, do something like a kid again.........go skate boarding. Get some ice cream, anything that will help lift you spirits.
LOL, Kitt!!! You're right....it's all in the interpretation!
Dan, thanks for the support on the brother issue. Unfortunately, some behaviours become a family legacy, and this is no exception. He grew up thinking it was okay to dish it out, and I grew up thinking it was okay to take it. (Needless to say I have worked on this quite heavily in therapy since my divorce). We are both victims of our childhood, in different ways. I am only hoping that he will give some thought to this after he calms down. Ideally, he needs to get some help (something along the lines of anger management, for starters).
Not to distract you for too long, but what's your paper about? Did the study session go alright? I can tell you are suffering, my friend, and I'm so sorry.....but please, please don't give up. I can't promise to hang out with you all night (I woke up at 4 am today!) but I'll check back and see how it's going. YOU CAN DO THIS!!!!!!!
DON’T GIVE UP!!!!!
What is your paper about? Do you want to talk about it? You can email me if you wish – my address is listed in my profile.