Can't believe I've got to this stage but here I am.
Last year I quit an office job where I was being paid good money to pursue my dream of becoming a journalist. It started out as a hobby but turned into the one thing everyone told me I should purse so I did and enrolled in a qualification at the local college. Six months down the line I am now out of college and in debt because someone in the class decided they didn't like me and made a point of doing and saying a few nasty things. By the end of their little hate campaign I'd had enough and told him if he had a problem to sort it out with me. He then goes and claims I threatened him so I got suspended whilst they investigated his claim.
Three weeks down the line this person is still in college whilst his claim is being investigated but I was told not to come in until they had fully investigated. Today I got a letter effectively saying that they didn't feel it would be beneficial for me to be let back in. So basically, thanks for the £2,000 you paid to us for the year but we don't want you here. My defence wasn't even looked at, not for one second.
I have lost a further three weeks of my life where I could've had some form of backup plan if this happened. Now I have nothing. I have now given up on writing. This was my one and only chance. I can't afford to do it again. I can't spend years in and out of office jobs until I can afford to do it again. By that stage I will be 24. That is too late for me. I really couldn't afford to waste this year but it looks like it is now wasted. I quit a job for it because it was what I wanted to do and now all that's been thrown back in my face.
I honestly want to . Writing and football were the only thing I have ever wanted in my life and since I started college they have become a parcel instead of individual interests. I wanted it so badly that I have worked and studied for 22 hours every day for the past three months, lost weight cos I have worked so hard but that didn't prove that I wanted it that badly to the powers that be who trampled on all my hard work and determination with a cheap letter.
Tonight I had a nervous breakdown with everything that has happened and now I want to turn my back on everyone and everything and just myself. The only person who could help me through something like this was my best friend who was more like a big brother to me but he died two years ago so I think I'd be better off . All I'm doing now is staying alive to stop other people feeling bad about
themselves, namely my family. This was all I had and all I wanted and it's gone. That's it for me now.
Post Edited By Moderator (getting by) : 3/30/2009 9:13:58 PM (GMT-6)