My Depression.

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SadieLady
New Member


Date Joined May 2009
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 5/14/2009 5:42 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi, I'm new to the forums.. but I've been looking at some posts and I think it's my turn to explain My Depression. Reason why I tried looking for somewhere to talk and to get help is here because no one to talk to IRL or to share with.

Okay to begin..

My life sucks right about now. My mom is so paranoid she doesn't me go outside without asking, we even have a fenced in backyard. I don't have any friends, at all. And if I do she's right on my neck about it.

My mom took me out of school in 6th grade to stay home and to watch her kids. She told me "my life is the little ones" And now she has 7-5-3 year olds that drives me crazy. They scream like she screams. They pee all over the toilet seat, leave wet toilet tissue on the floor, throw food around, don't listen to me, and cry. My mom lets them get away with this, while she lays back in the bed and watch TV. I have to feed, bath and dress her kids. What a mother should be doing, she makes me do. And when she tells me she was having another baby.. I thought suicide, she wants to have more Devils she can't watch. She doesn't even take care of the kids she has, not to mention me and I'm one of her kids... I feel like a home nanny. She only likes the babies when they are small and when they get 2+ years she passes them on for me and my older brother to watch.

This is not fair. People tell me to call social workers on her but they'll probably take her kids (my bros and sis) and I don't want to do that much damage. I rather leave. But I have no car because she feels im going to be out "all day" and leaver her with her kids. So she doesn't supply me with a car as well. I feel so trapped and lost, I am so depressed its not even funny.

We have a Family business. And she doesn't give me any money at ALL. She puts it all in bills, I have to walk around the store and "ask" for what I want. So I'm not even around people as myself I'm around family 24/7 and go home and have kids be bad and have to clean 24/7. The house stays dirty while she stays in her bed and not help and demand me to clean up her kids mess.. mess I didn't do at all because I am neat.

So I can't just go and move out. I have nothing, no one, no money. So I am trapped.

I am Sadie, 17 years old. 18 in June. And very depressed. Can someone please give me some advice? Some help.. please.

ivy6
Elite Member


Date Joined Sep 2005
Total Posts : 10404
   Posted 5/15/2009 2:49 AM (GMT -7)   
Sadie, sweetheart, this is really not right. I think that you are trapped in an exploitative and abusive situation, and my feeling is that things won't change for you, even after your 18th birthday, unless you contact somebody soon. I am not an expert, but my guess is that you are more likely to get help *now*, while you are a minor, than you will as a legal adult.

May I ask what country, and even what state, you live in? It's hard for us to be specific in our advice without knowing where you live.

I know you're frightened about your siblings being split up, but I do feel it is important that you alert somebody to your situation, and quickly. Another child is about to be born into this situation; I don't think things are going to change for you any time soon, and I think you need an outside catalyst to break this cycle of maternal neglect.

I wonder if you've seen the tv movie "Gracie's Choice", or read the Readers' Digest article on which that movie was based? Essentially, it's a true story about a girl who was in your situation and got out, *with* her brothers and sisters. They weren't split up and put into foster homes: "Gracie" was given custody of her siblings, and her mother was forbidden to have contact with them anymore.

You can find the original article here:

http://www.rd.com/your-america-inspiring-people-and-stories/rd-on-tv-gracies-choice/article18017.html

Now, on a practical level, are you safe there? Are you making sure you log-out and clear your user history every time you use the computer, so your mother can't come here and read your posts?

Please do keep coming here and talking to us, and *please*, please think about getting some help. All you need to do is pick up the phone and call the emergency services: 911, 000, 999, whatever number is relevant where you live.

*hug*

Ivy.
Co-Moderator Crohn's Forum.

New meds thread


stkitt
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 5/15/2009 4:25 AM (GMT -7)   

Dear Sadie,

Welcome and many (((((((((hugs)))))))))).  You have been given a heavy load to carry and it is time to try to help you get out from under all you are going through.

First of all it is so sad that your Mother pulled you out of school when you were only in the 6th grade.  That was not right as you are entitled to your education and  I hope someday you will be able to finish your education.  You appear to be very literate and I suspect you would learn quickly if given the chance to go back to school.

I agree with Ivy, you should contact Social Services re your home life.  If your Mother has treated you this way then she may continue on to treat your siblings the same way.  As you stated she is only interested in the babies and does not take responsibility for the children.

Please do reach out to your social services in the community in which you live. I hate the thought of you having to go this route but it truly may be your best choice.  Be brave and take the first step. 

Is there a Father in your life at all?  Anyone you can think of to turn to for help?

Please know you have come to a wonderful forum and you will find the members to be warm and caring so keep on talking with  us.

Gentle Hugs

Kitt


 

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ivy6
Elite Member


Date Joined Sep 2005
Total Posts : 10404
   Posted 5/15/2009 4:36 AM (GMT -7)   
... and if you do have an older brother, then he is over 18, and the odds of you getting out of this situation at *all* may be quite slim. If she won't let him go, she's unlikely to let you go.

I did some netsearching and found a forum that you might find helpful. Here it is:

http://thepsychopath.freeforums.org/index.php

Don't be put off by the "psychopath" part. There's a forum for the children of narcissistic parents, and (though I'm not an expert) I think you might be able to relate to the stories there, and get some more experienced help, on top of what you're getting here. After all, we may be able to deal with depression, but you're in an unusual situation that we don't see on this forum too often... but it is discussed a lot on the forum I've directed you to.

Please do take care of yourself,

Ivy.
Co-Moderator Crohn's Forum.

New meds thread


THE HAPPY TURTLE
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 18773
   Posted 5/17/2009 6:02 AM (GMT -7)   
sadie my dear, ivy and kitt have given you some wonderful info, i send u my compassion, yeah it's a hard situation, but without help soon you will be continually trapped. time for sadie to shine, time for sadie. we care, you have been brave in posting, keep doing so okay, time for the next step. luving kindness, jamie
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