Good Morning cowboy,
I am glad you got a call back for an appointment for your wife. A good counselor will not tell your wife that you are the problem. You posted " I keep thinking that maybe the councelor is going to tell her I am the problem. "
Counseling involves a process, the aim of which is to help others to help themselves by making better choices and becoming better choosers of options. The counselor’s repertoire of skills includes those of forming an understanding relationship, as well as interventions, focused on helping people change specific aspects of their feeling, thinking and acting.
Try not to become anxious re what your wife and the counselor will discuss and remember this is a positive step.
No one person is perfect and guilt is a wasted emotion so please don't beat yourself up. We all have feelings and all of us have rough days and could use some support. Not knowing where to turn for it or having someone not understand is very hurtful and sad. I know I have been in your shoes so please know that here in HW we do understand.
I wish you peace,