“If what I say resonates with you, it is merely because we are both branches on the same tree." ~W.B. Yeats
Hi Hurting, I am so sorry for all the pain and problems you are having. Isn't the pain from having the fibromyalgia and the lupus? I think you shoud make an appointment with your PCP and get a good work up of tests to see where there are problems and what can be done to help you. You are not a worthless person. You are in fact a very decent and kind and loving person. Look at the wonderful family you have and how you are helping out your son in his time of need. In terms of your work can you take the FMLA at this time? If you are eligible you are entitled to 3 months off. It would be without pay but it would give you time to figure out your medical situation. I know how hard it is to lose weight. It doesn't take dieting but takes a lifestyle change. If you go on the internet you will find many ways and ideas of losing weight that are practical and may help you. I don't want to push any particular group but I did lose 40 lbs at a group and it was just as I said a lifestyle change. In the meantime, do keep your appt. with the psychiatrist. You may find some real help. Many of us have bad feelings about ourselves so please don't feel you are alone in this and you are certainly not at fault for anything. You need to get to the bottom of your depression and learn what you can do to help yourself. In the meantime you have a loving family and a wonderful husband. Please post here anytime, there are so many kind and wonderful members who will reach out to you and give you a "shoulder to cry on." There is always someone who will answer you. Please take good care and remember you are a good person.