has anyone overcome co-dependency

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New Member

Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 18
   Posted 6/6/2009 12:54 AM (GMT -6)   
i am going to therapy, but making no progress..any advice would be helpful.....thanks.....dutchone

New Member

Date Joined Jun 2009
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 6/6/2009 12:56 AM (GMT -6)   
what are your concerns

New Member

Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 18
   Posted 6/6/2009 1:07 AM (GMT -6)   
my goal is to be independent and to be "sane" in my own skin. i was hoping that if someone here successfullly overcome this problem and how, maybe i could go in another direction, because nothing seems to be helping me, and it sinks me into major depression, i know alot of it has to do with my health too, i have fibro and cfs

Elite Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 18554
   Posted 6/6/2009 9:10 AM (GMT -6)   
hey dutchone, then do not forget about the cfs and fibro. some medical issues compound the depression we feel, as depression compounds the other stuff too. keep fightin' my friend, healings, jamie

New Member

Date Joined Apr 2009
Total Posts : 18
   Posted 6/6/2009 9:40 AM (GMT -6)   
thanks jamiee, you are always here when i need a friend, i feel as if im having a nervous breakdown, and trying desperately to overcome these drowning feelings, i hate not feeling safe in my own home, home has always been my refuge, but im not feeling that now, i want to escape, but nowhere to escape too...have you ever had those feelings?

Elite Member

Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 18554
   Posted 6/6/2009 10:12 AM (GMT -6)   
yeah a long time ago, your safe place can be something you see, feel, know, u don't have to go to a place, quietly sit, burn incense, slow deep breaths, use relaxing music, put the do not disturb sign up and go there, see everything, see beyond, float and let yourself be at one with this place, trust me, it works, because it is your place of true refuge. jamie

Forum Moderator

Date Joined Apr 2007
Total Posts : 32602
   Posted 6/6/2009 10:38 AM (GMT -6)   
Good Morning, I am so sorry your going through a rough time.  I am glad your in therapy and wondering if you are letting your therapist know how you really feel and how you do not feel the therapy is helping.
There may be other options available.

One of the best remedies for depression is to talk about it. Here's where good friends and family can come in. The old adage "A problem shared is a problem halved" comes into its own here, and while you may dismiss it as nonsense, it may surprise you how anxiety alleviating it can be to just talk to someone. Coming here talking with us is a good way to get out your fears and reach out for help.

Please know we are here for you.

Gentle Hugs



Kitt, Co-Moderator:
Depression,  & 
http://www.healingwell.com/donate *~*
"When you find peace within yourself, you become the kind of person who can live at peace with others."
Not a mental health professional of any kind
Clickable Link: Anxiety-Panic Resources

Veteran Member

Date Joined Feb 2005
Total Posts : 616
   Posted 6/6/2009 7:09 PM (GMT -6)   
dutchone, sorry about what you are going through. from what your saying I understand that you feel loonly and you don't feel happiness and need someone to provide you with that, someone special to fill your life with joy, that is a common feeling when you depressed, it's an illusion that by just falling in love with someone that you won't feel depressed and just feel joyfull. but actually it is not true and you need to find a way to feel happy about yourself and love yourself, otherwise if you go into a relationship like that it may end up badly. I know it is very hard to work on being happy and content when your depressed and feeling misrable and loonly, but it is a fight you have to take head on and giving up is not an option. rememebr life is a continues battle and you will always have good times and bad times. when your in the good times try to stay in the moment and enjoy them when you can, and when your in bad times keep your hopes up and try to remember the good things in life like the good times and your friends or people who are close to you.

To fight off depression it its good to have weapons, things you can do to fight this off. there is many weapons out there and my favourites are talknig and ranting, letting this out to someone who understands. remember you can't do with anyone, it has to be someone who is understanding and kind and will support you when you need them, letting it out to the wrong person will bring bad results. also aside from just talking you can try and keep yourself buesy and maybe either read or do some excersize, something that could keep your mind buesy with something or your body buesy. exersize is proven to increase self-esteam and will also make your relax ( once your done and have a hot shower ), if you don't like running you can just walk. if your boared with walking you can try dancing, like join a dance class, or even try aerobics.

dutchone, I hope you can discover ways to fight the depression, something that works for you, we are different, what works for me does not nessearly work for you , you need to discover what may work for you. but in general about the therapy I think therapy is good but it doesn't always work for everyone, it's just one weapon in an aresnal, and you need to try different things and see whatever does work for you. for me talking or writing down my feelings seems to help the most. I like to discuss what I feel with someone or even more than one person, get different views. if something is troubleing my mind and I can't find a solution I try and seek help from whoever can provide that help, wheather be it a doctor, a therapist a friend or even a relative. excersize used to help me but I don't know lately I have not found the will do it, and since I was able to find other weapons I can use I am content for now. still I cannot denie that for sometime exersize helped me a lot in the past, it's proven that is does work for many people.

good luck dutchone, may you see better days in the future, and learn how to deal with your depression, take care!
Former Addict of Online Video Games ( MMORPGs ) , Sober since April 6th 2008
Diagnosed with Major Depression since 2002

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