Small things you can do

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enWayen
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Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 585
   Posted 6/13/2009 2:17 AM (GMT -7)   
Heeja,

No idea whether this works for everyone, but it does work for me. Whenever I can, I try to figure out new ways to do "good", and do them. Very small things, like taking care for some plants (don't have pets), recycle your plastic coffee cup at work, get something to drink for the rest, etc. When I feel down, those things are harder, but not impossible. And it does have a calming effect. Maybe that will work for some of you too.

Genuinely trying to help others, whether they are human or not, brings a much deeper sort of happiness, more like a calm. At least, with me. And it helps a lot with stopping thoughts of being useless as well.

There are a million things you can do, and I am very curious whether you do something to help the world, and what it is. Can you please share them with me? :-) Maybe we can make a list or something with easy things to do when inspiration fails you (which tends to happen a lot with me).

Thanks in advance, and have a wonderful day!

Erik
Acceptance is the key

The World is but a reflection. Smile, and it will smile back.

Try to keep smiling! :)


THE HAPPY TURTLE
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 18774
   Posted 6/13/2009 2:26 AM (GMT -7)   
cheers erik, excellent post, alike you for me it is compassion. i also say hello to everyone i see and pass, i smile too, bit weird as not many teeth and a balding head! the other thing that is a little different is that i always keep a clean house, as i feel it is an expression of me to my many guests. my house is never locked and i tell my visitors to make themselves welcome, most make a cuppa till i get back. so, my home is open to all, yeah i do a lot of mentoring/counselling, but more in the disguise of compassion. when my neighbour is unwell i also walk her dogs, and i do welfare checks on people i have not seen for a bit to. jamie

enWayen
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 585
   Posted 6/13/2009 2:34 AM (GMT -7)   
Heeja Jamie,

Sounds wonderful! Saying hello to everyone is a good thing to do! My friend just came back from Ghana, and he said that when you seek a chair in Ghana, everyone that sits besides an empty says "You're invited". I found that rather surprising and a huge eye-opener.

Small things like that can have a huge impact I believe. Keep it up!
Acceptance is the key

The World is but a reflection. Smile, and it will smile back.

Try to keep smiling! :)


THE HAPPY TURTLE
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 18774
   Posted 6/13/2009 2:36 AM (GMT -7)   
luv it! u too! time to watch some footy, see you later. jamie turn

Raniah
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Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 1190
   Posted 6/13/2009 5:26 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Erik,

Great thread! I totally agree with you……genuinely trying to help others does bring a deep sense of purpose and meaning to life. It also helps to distract from depressive thoughts in a positive way, as you have said.

I have a passion for plants, animals, and all things in nature. One of my favourite things to do is to go for a walk in the woods and watch and listen to all the activity out there. I try to be environmentally aware in the way I live my life……I make my own household cleaners with natural ingredients, and I make trips to the recycling center twice a week. I support local organic farmers and buy my produce from them, and try to keep as many of my purchases on a local scale as I can…..good for our little farming community, and saves on gasoline!

I also spend time visiting a few of my friends/neighbours who are elderly and live alone. It saddens me to think of someone with so much wisdom and experience to share, sitting alone in a house with no one to talk to. I have learned some of my most valuable lessons by doing this, and it has taught me that no matter how old we get, we still feel like the same person on the inside, and we still have the same needs for love and companionship.

Thanks for such a heartwarming thread…..it really brightened my day!


 
 
 
Moderator, Depression Forum
 

“No one is as capable of gratitude as one who has emerged from the kingdom of night.” ~Elie Wiesel

 

 


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40602
   Posted 6/13/2009 9:18 AM (GMT -7)   
This is a wonderful thread. I don't do as much as I use to. I use to feed the birds and all kinds of other wild animals. The cats started comeing in though and I ended up stoppping. As they were killing my birds.

Another thing that I use to do when I walked my dogs, was to pick up garbage along side of the road. It made me feel good and looked a lot better. I would carry it to the barrel in our local cemetary. And that made me feel good. I would visit my relatives while I was there.

I have always tried to help elderly people. I carry my empty bottles and cans to the local animal shelter for them to cash in for extra money. Also I make Christmas wreaths for them for their Christmas Walk in November. But don't know if I will have time this year. But I will try.

I hope you all have a wonderful day. Take care.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


THE HAPPY TURTLE
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 18774
   Posted 6/13/2009 7:51 PM (GMT -7)   
excellent thread, thx eric, and to all posters. it is great that the small things bring some peace. every new thing starts small, hopefully these little things, which are beautiful will become bigger via other people adopting similar practices!! turn   jamie

farewellstand
New Member


Date Joined Jun 2009
Total Posts : 15
   Posted 6/13/2009 8:16 PM (GMT -7)   
I have always tried to help others and be there for them and give of myself and care passionately for my fellow human. But it is soo difficult when most others fail to do the same. I have always tried to live by the "do unto others" credo...except that I have made the mistake in life of expecting others to treat me as I treat them..BIG mistake. No really. There have been many times when I have gotten into arguments with people in which I say " but I would do that for YOU", or " of course I expect you to be there for me emotionally when I need you, I was always there for YOU" I know I am wrong in assuming other people will be as empathetic as i am. I think I need to expect less from other people..maybe then I will be pleasently surprised..and in turn..happier..
M
" a love that moves the sun in heaven and all the stars; this is just a fraction of what is rightfully ours"
Male 32 Depression, Anxiety, Celexa, Klonapin


THE HAPPY TURTLE
Elite Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 18774
   Posted 6/14/2009 2:27 AM (GMT -7)   
understand. for me i assume nothing. jamie

Raniah
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 1190
   Posted 6/14/2009 5:58 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi FS,

Expectations are a tough thing, and I think we've all been there, when we've extended ourselves to someone and they haven't reciprocated with the same caring or attention. I try to remember that most of the time, people do not do that intentionally.....there are so many reasons why someone may not return a favour, and there is no way of knowing what is going on in another person's head or heart. It's better if you don't take it as a personal rejection, although I know that's hard sometimes. Try to focus on the joy of giving, without the expectation of receiving....it makes it a little easier to bear.
 
 
 
Moderator, Depression Forum
 

“No one is as capable of gratitude as one who has emerged from the kingdom of night.” ~Elie Wiesel

 

 


enWayen
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 585
   Posted 6/14/2009 6:09 AM (GMT -7)   
Heeja,

First of all, thanks for sharing!! You can all be proud of the things you do!

Fare, what Raniah already said, expectations can be really hard when they aren't met. But what if you wouldn't have expectations? That way, one can't fail you, or can he / she? Sometimes we do things for others in hopes that they return the favour, but sometimes we do things for others because we think that will make them happy. And that last type of doing stuff isn't based on getting something in return. Ironically, that last one mentioned will in the end give you much more in return. Because there is no way to 'fail', since there are no expectations :-). So everything you get out of it will be something to enjoy.
Of course, it is very hard not to have expectations, and I think there are very few who actually have none, but ain't it something worth trying??

Take care everyone! :-)
Acceptance is the key

The World is but a reflection. Smile, and it will smile back.

Try to keep smiling! :)

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