split up woth my boyfriend

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Confusedli
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 363
   Posted 6/15/2009 3:20 PM (GMT -7)   
I haven't been on here much lately, I have been keeping my anxiety and depression in check lately, but today I split up with my boyfriend of 2 years.  I feel like my world is falling apart, all my dreams and plans for the future have been whisked out from under me and I no longer know what to do with myself.
 
Its all very raw and new at the minute, and I know time is a healer and all, but right now I'm just not sure how to get through, I am feeling so confused, unsure, upset, emotional, everything all at once, I feel like my favourite person to talk to about things has been taken away aswell.
 
anyways thanks for listening,
 
Li
Confusedli
 
"The Optimist sees the rose and not its thorns; the pessimist stares at the thorns, oblivious of the rose."
 
"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, its about learning to dance in the rain"


Raniah
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 1190
   Posted 6/15/2009 5:18 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Li,

I'm so sorry about the break-up. Obviously this was an important longterm relationship for you, and I know the pain must be difficult to bear. I'm glad you posted here for support, and I hope your friends and/or family will be supportive, too. Be gentle with yourself now, and take the opportunity to do some soothing things.....listening to music, long walks, movies.....whatever will bring you some peace. You have my prayers and best wishes in your grief.
 
 
 
Moderator, Depression Forum
 

“No one is as capable of gratitude as one who has emerged from the kingdom of night.” ~Elie Wiesel

 

 


getting by
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Sep 2007
Total Posts : 40602
   Posted 6/15/2009 6:30 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi Li,

I am so sorry to hear this news. The two of you were together for a long time and this is probably going to be hard for you. But you are young still and there could very well be something else in store for you.

Be good to yourself. Try to do some self nurturing right now. You will be happy again. Take it one day at a time.

You will get through this and we are all here to help you.

Hugs, Karen
  Moderator-Depression and fibromyalgia
 
fibromyalgia, Chronic fatigue, depression,allergies


Tirzah
Veteran Member


Date Joined Jul 2008
Total Posts : 2284
   Posted 6/15/2009 7:17 PM (GMT -7)   
Li,
I think Karen & Raniah have already given you some good advice. I just wanted to let you know that you have my support as well. You are wise to say that with time the pain will subside, but that doesn't lessen your feelings right now. Keep posting whenever the feelings get overwhelming & hang in there.

peace,
Frances
Moderator -- Depression Forum


NightWish
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2008
Total Posts : 129
   Posted 6/15/2009 9:50 PM (GMT -7)   
Hey Li, remember me? I'm sorry you are hurting right now from your breakup. I'm sure your decision was not easy, but deep down, you know you made the best and healthiest choice. Losing someone special is a very uncomfortable feeling, and it can make us feel very uneasy with the whole world, but know that you won't feel this way forever. Do things that make you feel good and happy. Your life is waiting for you! :-) You've been so helpful to me in the past and I want you to know that you are a very awesome person!

NW

Confusedli
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 363
   Posted 6/16/2009 1:15 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Guys,
thanks for your kind responses.  Nightwish - it wasn't my decision, thats what hurts so much. I really don't know what to do with myself at the minute, I feel so restless and scared of what the future holds.
Confusedli
 
"The Optimist sees the rose and not its thorns; the pessimist stares at the thorns, oblivious of the rose."
 
"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, its about learning to dance in the rain"


enWayen
Veteran Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 585
   Posted 6/16/2009 3:28 AM (GMT -7)   
Heej Li,

Sorry to hear this :-(. Right now, I can't even imagine how you must feel, but my thoughts are with you. I like to think everything happens for our own benefit, that we get stronger from it, and that it is the best that could happen to us. I don't know if that thought is comfort to you now, or oil on the fire.

I am sure someone else will show up for you Li, you are one of the most inspiring people I know! Thank you for that.

Take care!
Moderator on the Depression Forum

The World is but a reflection. Smile, and it will smile back.
Perfection is found in everything being as you want it to be. Have no expectations, and perfection will be inevitable.


Hibee
Forum Moderator


Date Joined Oct 2008
Total Posts : 6499
   Posted 6/16/2009 6:00 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Li

Sorry to hear your news my thoughts are with you, know that we are always here to listen and support you.

Ben

Confusedli
Regular Member


Date Joined Apr 2008
Total Posts : 363
   Posted 6/17/2009 3:20 AM (GMT -7)   
I am struggeling so much at the minute, I am so restless and I don't know what to do with myself. I miss him so much and it has only been a couple of days. I am being ridiculous and pathetic!
Confusedli
 
"The Optimist sees the rose and not its thorns; the pessimist stares at the thorns, oblivious of the rose."
 
"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, its about learning to dance in the rain"


Raniah
Veteran Member


Date Joined Mar 2009
Total Posts : 1190
   Posted 6/17/2009 6:09 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi Li,

No, you are definitely not ridiculous or pathetic! Grieving the end of a relationship can be really tough, and it can take time, too. I don't know if this suggestion will help or not, but I've found that taking on a new project - something creative, like painting or playing an instrument or making a garden, for example - really helps to release all of those emotions and keep me focused on what I'm doing, instead of focusing on all the thoughts of the past and the future. If you find you need to deal more directly with your thoughts and feelings, then perhaps a really good self-help book or workbook might be the ticket. I've found that reading and working through those types of books can be really helpful, too, and the whole journalling process is also very therapeutic - another good source of release. Please know that it's perfectly natural to feel this way......don't judge yourself for your feelings, but instead, be kind and gentle with yourself, and give yourself the love and comfort that you deserve.
 
 
 
Moderator, Depression Forum
 

“No one is as capable of gratitude as one who has emerged from the kingdom of night.” ~Elie Wiesel

 

 


Amiee1234
New Member


Date Joined Jun 2009
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 6/17/2009 7:21 AM (GMT -7)   
Hi im new to this but i was just wondering iv been with my bf for nearly years now i was completly in love untill someone wanted me to go out with another boy i started worrying what if i like him more what if i dont love my bf so the worrys went on an on and on 24/7 for 3 months i mean i didnt think about anything else so i finished it and within an hour i felt like i wanted to kill my self barring in mind he had done nothing wrong to me we were perfect for each other so i begged for him back i thought the feeling was worse than the worrying feeling well for 2 hours i was so happy then the thoughts started coming back and i felt sick lost my appetite well then i thought i had depression so went to a counceller he thought i had anxiety but its been 4 months and on and of i felt different about him one minute i thought i love you so much then i wanted to finish him due to all this built up worry i thought it was anxiety untill someone told me you know when you love someone and no worry or negative thoughts can change that, i just wanted some peoples opinions because im stuck i cry at the thought of not being with him yet the worry will not leave me alone i just want to know do you feel like this when your not in love with someone or does it sound like anxiety gad because if i end it i want to get better because ending it is going to send me very depressed. thanks amiee xxxx
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