My holiday is pretty quiet too. No parties or fireworks. I slept in a bit, then came here to HW. After that I cleaned the bathroom and read a book. Now I am back here checking things out and hoping all are having a good day.
Now lets figure out what you are going to do on the 7th. How about you post some ideas for the day that will keep you busy, allow you to feel the sadness but to work through it and know that there is good in your life with better days ahead ?
I am always here for you to play ideas off of.
Many gentle Hugs
My 4th was absolutely the worst ever!! Long story short my friend didnt call and I slept through the fireworks, they just dont have the same meaning anymore. Then Sunday she called and gave some lame excuse and invited me to their campsite about some 20-30 miles away. Of course it was right past a place where memories were happy and it made me sad. She and i got into a verbal arguement and I left on foot home not knowing that the place I knew was much further than I remembered. I walked in the dark around midnight and fell exhausted. I phoned the police because I was so scared and they phoned a cab to pick me up at the place I knew. However, I was further away than I thought and the cab actually had to find me walking. Here I was almost 5 miles from the restaurant. I was cold, scared and feeling alone once again. I had to stop at convenience store called Duke and Duchess and use the ATM to get cash for the cab. After $50 of money I didnt have and coming home to noone to care about what happened, I spent the next day in bed with all the windows covered and no communication to anyone.
I cant take much more of this. I am still looking for a doctor to take care of me. I run out of meds in three weeks and dont know what to do. Without them, I dont know what will happen. I am trying so hard to stay up but I am not doing a good job.
I am really starting to think that I have noone on my side or who understands me. Because of what happened on sunday, I have lost important friends, or at least I thought they were my friends. No I take that back, my feelings and reasons were not even considered and everything I do is wrong. I consider myself strong-willed and not afraid to speak the truth or what I feel. From what I am hearing I am wrong and that is why I am alone. "WHATEVER""""
So thanks you guys for being my friend and accepting me the way I am, even when I am wrong:~, lol.
Guess some friends werent meant to be.
When we are feeling depressed we often feel all alone, like no one in the world is there for us and we are always to blame for everything. This is not true.
It is at times like these, when we must dig deep into the inner most part of our resolve, and our will! We all have been where you are now, I have been there many times, and then some. I totally understand how you feel, the desperation, and lonliness. What you must do now, is succeed, set aside all else, and clear a path for yourself, and go for the most incredible dream of your life! What has happened in the past, will remain there, it is up to you to carve your future. You have it in you, you just don't know it now, everything is blurred by the pain and depression. But remember my friend, you are stronger than you think, and it is never too late to turn it all around!
You have friends here and in your life. Right now you are feeling upset but give yourself sometime and perhaps this friendship can be mended.