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AuSsieG1rL
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2004
Total Posts : 62
   Posted 9/27/2004 4:36 PM (GMT -7)   
I was just wondering if depression could lead to something called self-injury

Circe_olives
New Member


Date Joined Sep 2004
Total Posts : 6
   Posted 9/27/2004 7:09 PM (GMT -7)   
HI, could you explain a bit more ? I think I get what you're saying ,but maybe I'm not.
By the way, I"m an Aussie too! Good to meet ya.

AuSsieG1rL
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2004
Total Posts : 62
   Posted 9/27/2004 8:00 PM (GMT -7)   
Hehe... I'm not really Austraillian; sorry. I'm Korean but chose my name because of my friend's suggestion for a screen name. Hypothetically, if someone is depressed and also has had a some major personal problems the past few years and now deals with their pain, anger, lonliness, etc., by cutting themself  would it be because of the depression?

Post Edited By Moderator (HW_Peace) : 9/30/2004 6:44:16 PM (GMT-6)


Red09
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2003
Total Posts : 424
   Posted 10/1/2004 9:37 AM (GMT -7)   
No offense...Just an idea. Maybe when editting someone's post and dumping it a reason should be put WHY. This is what most other sites do so the poster doesn't feel so offended or hurt.

Just my 2 cents here.


dori18
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2004
Total Posts : 847
   Posted 10/6/2004 5:06 PM (GMT -7)   
Hi aussiegirl, I'm not from this forum I normally post on fibro, but I caught your post here, so let me see if I can answer your question.....you could categorize it as depression I guess because of the nature of the problem-where it's stemming from, but it could be something other than depression as well, people with eating disorders, personality disorders, ect sometimes also do this, but most psychologists I know categorize this as self mutilation-as it's own diagnosis because it shows up in many dysorders. If you know someone who is engaging in self mutilating activities such as cutting, burning, hair pulling, bruising, ect., might you suggest this person seek help as a preventor so they do not take it to a next level. Self mutilating is dangerous, so if this person is unwilling to seek help his/herself and if you fear on any level for their life maybe you might consider alerting someone who can intercede and get help for this person, because it's possible that if this person is hurting themselves they might also be suicidal-maybe not, but better to be safe than sorry. Life ife precious-take it seriously. My opinion...........
When life hands you lemons...stick 'em in your bra! Can't hurt, might help!                   -Maxine


AuSsieG1rL
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2004
Total Posts : 62
   Posted 10/7/2004 9:10 PM (GMT -7)   
Julie... everyone,

Yes, it is me that I am talking about in this post. I have been doing it since my jr yr in high school and I am now a sophomore in college. I can't help it! It's a way of relaxation and a way to "escape" from the world that I live in ("real world"). I don't really know how to really express why I started. Because, it is very personal and I feel guilty for the outcome/consequences for letting the secret out. I try not to do it as much as possible and also because my best friend, ex-teacher, worries about me because of it. I can't get what I so desperately need (help) b/c of my mom really-- I am still on my parents' insurance, I've never really had a real job, and right now I can't find anyone who will hire me. If I'm not at school, I'm home babysitting my grandma who has Alzheimers-- since 1999. I have no car b/c it's in the shop. All I do is sit here in front of the computer, watch what little tv I do watch, and take care of my puppy. My ex-teacher is the ONLY one I trust anymore and is the ONLY one who really understands me and is there for me. She has put a lot on the line as well as done more than enough for me. I think that is the main reason that after I graduated, we became friends and such good friends at that. I've come to the point of not caring anymore, not complaining, not doing anything or everything. No one in my family believes me, it's like I'm not allowed to have sympathy but I must give it. I HATE docs b/c they are bogus and don't believe me as well, and also thinking that everything I say can't/couldn't be true. I am just alone in this world with one"True Blue" friend: my ex-teacher.

Sincerely,
AuSsieG1rL

dori18
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2004
Total Posts : 847
   Posted 10/7/2004 11:55 PM (GMT -7)   
Aussieg1rl-
you are very brave to be so honest- and baby it's the first step to getting help. please do not look at this as an escape or a relaxation method-trying to get yourself out of the real world can cause you to get caught up in a fantasy that's hard to escape, and the end result means having to work harder to re build/ establish a healthy life for yourself. it's really great that you have your friend to lean on for support, but from what you said in other posts, sh eherself is struggling. also part of recovery is building a support SYSTEM. i understand your dilema in finding help because of being n you rparents insurance. Did icatch you are a sophmore in college? look into the programs you rschool offers-many have a wellness center which provides services not only with a physician but also have a psychologist on staff. Many times these services are free for students and if not maybe they can help you apply for student insurance or state insurance which would have nothing to do with your parents and if this option is open to you, everything you share with this psychologist is confidential by law and your parents do not have to know you are seeing someone. maybe you might try telling your mother. Do not keep yourself from getting help because you want to spare your parents' feelings. They are your parents and their feelings and what they are going to think is NOT more important than your life. if they love you you rwellbeing and your life are going to very important to them, and for you eventhough there may be rough times at first with allowing them in you rrecovery, they can be one of the most important people involved in your support system. But if you choose to not include them, do not let that stop you fromhelping yourself. View your options-they won't charge you for asking questions. if you don't want to do it through you rschool, call a local mental health agency and ask them about your options. explain you rcircumstances. like i said, what you tell someone is confidential and if you call first you have the choice of remaining annonymous. don't sit in front of the compuer or tv for too long-give yourself a breather and step ouside or maybe buy an exercise or yoga video-that would be a great release of energy and a positive alternative to taking this energy out on your body-don't put it back in, let it out. Exercise also gets those endorphins pumping. Do not stop caring about yourself and life, continue complaining-don't hold it in. you don't want to get to a point of not feeling or caring because that's giving up and you have so much life ahead of you-you will succeed if you allow yourself and you are worth it. before i go please allow me to give some constructive criticism-do not ask for sympathy-you don't need it. Sympathy is what allows you to continue on with pity parties and has no constuctive use-ask for empathy, understanding because that is what will allow people to help you if you let them in and let them understand. you are strong for reaching out here and ihope you the best in reaching out to others. we will be here for for support and a listening ear(or eyes!). you are not alone in this world-others have worked through this and you can too.
Prayers and hugs

To julie-i read on another post that you felt you had no good advice on the fibro forum and you rposts were being edited-i have read very very good advice and suport from you, please don't stop posting! I think almost everyone has had posts edited before maybe because of fibro fog mistakes or other reasons unknown and while i agree it would be nice to know pecifically why, i hope you don't let it get you down. i look forward to reading your posts.
When life hands you lemons...stick 'em in your bra! Can't hurt, might help!                   -Maxine


AuSsieG1rL
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2004
Total Posts : 62
   Posted 10/8/2004 6:01 PM (GMT -7)   
I dunno.... I tried calling a hotline thing like that and it got me in a whole mess of trouble. My first semester of college, I tried an on campus whatever and he diagnosed me with mild anixety; especially now since I become very paranoid when it comes to law enforcement and whatnot. My friend who I mention here often is the ONLY person I trust and will talk to openly about anything and everything. After my ex-boyfriend stab me in the back, my trust is very limited. I had taken dance since I was about 8 or 9 and then I graduated from High school so there went my dancing; I had even gotten a scholarship with MGCCC Perk Campus Dance Team Perkettes but after a semester I couldn't stand it anymore and that is what brought me to their sister campus JD. I don't believe in showing emotions or what I call my "weakness" because I feel like a failure that way. I care more about the ones that I love instead of myself; especially my friend I so often mention here (FMS board). Lately-- past month or two I haven't done it b/c I am worried too much about my friend. She and I are one and I really feel like I am a reincarnated her. We are just too similar not to be! Anyway, I need to go.

AuSsie

dori18
Veteran Member


Date Joined Aug 2004
Total Posts : 847
   Posted 10/8/2004 6:34 PM (GMT -7)   
ok. so you have gone to the psycholgist at the school and he/she diagnosed you with anxiety. does he know that you mutilate yourself? knowing that could greatly assist him in treating you. but, if you don't want to see them again find someone else-like i said you can call and find out what your options are confidentially or annonymously what you can do to not have it on you rparents insurance if you choose not to talk to them about this. does your friend know about this? is there any way she can assist in helping you find someone? i kow you say she's having a really hard time herself-ican understand that especially with the fibro, so maybe at this point in both your lives it's time to reach out to someone who has a better understanding of the problems you are dealing with. she needs to make sure she's taking care of herself and you need to make sure you are taking care of yourself. from the perspective im seeing it sounds as if you two enabling each other not to find help and locking out the rest of the world. that's not good. maybe if you really want to get help for this, understand that making excuses is not the way to go about it-it's what is preventing you and allowing you to continue on this destructive path your on. please find some help for yourself-let someone in who can really do for you what you need. put yourself first because if you don't how do you think you can help your friend if you are unwilling to help yourself? and please also know that showing emotion is not a sign of weakness, it's a sign of strength and understanding of yourself-let it out! it's good for you!
ttyl love and hugs sent!
When life hands you lemons...stick 'em in your bra! Can't hurt, might help!                   -Maxine


AuSsieG1rL
Regular Member


Date Joined Sep 2004
Total Posts : 62
   Posted 10/9/2004 8:20 AM (GMT -7)   
That was fall of 2003 when I went to MGCCC Perk in Wiggins, MS. I only went once and I couldn't tell you what I remembered that I told the "professional." I don't EVER want to call another hotline or whatever after the first (and last) time that I did, they thought I was suicidal and traced my call. Yet, all they asked if I had ever tried to kill myself.

My friend, *Maecy*-- * means change of name for protection-- knows that I do this and it bothers her, upsets her, makes her worry, but one day before school started for this year, she was having a really bad day/night and she.... put it this way, she now understands and knows why I do "IT."

"It is like I was the only thing moving, and every thing else was still, and I was revolving
around everything." <--- direct quote from her.

She lets many people in, in a way. For example, she is VERY close to her family and they understand that she needs help and gets her whatever help she needs. Now, for me, she, in a way, wants to find me that help but after the traced phone call inncident, she doesn't want to get as involved-- help wise-- as she had been for fear that my family will cook up some more trashy rumors about her again; and I COMPLETELY understand. We actually balance one another out than locking ourselves from the world. Because, see, she sometimes likes the fact that I am here and that we are as close as we are, (getting closer as well), because sometimes she just has those times where talking to family and getting their opinons and view points isn't as good as getting them from someone out of the family and more from a friend's view than family view. And, vice versa. In a way, her inpiration and impact on my life has made me want to be an english major (just like her) but instead of just stopping at grad school, I am going to go ahead and go to law school-- *Maecy wanted to be a lawyer as well but when she was in school a guest speaker told the class that she was in that if they ever wanted to really have a family, that going into law school wasn't the path they should take.

Since we met my senior yr in high school, we just had this bond, this understanding that only the two of us know. One of us may be putting up a front to the class (her-- me it would be a front towards friends and family) but yet the other can read through the front, read through the lines and just know that the other one isn't having a good day or whatever. I feel honoured that she trusts me so much and tells me things that you don't really tell a person or even friend unless they are someone you REALLY know and HAVE known for quite some time-- which isn't in our case. She has put so much on the line for me since we met-- even her job! She understands the fact that I can't do much since I'm on my parents' insurance, that I haven't been able to get a job, that I acknowledge and am willing to get help, etc. I mean, since I was still here (not at a university) she and I had hoped that I would have been able to apply as a substitute teacher since I already know how to put grades in, how she teaches, how she grades tests, quizes, homework, essays, etc., but since they upped the minimum age requirements to 21 I couldn't. Because she knew that if she needed an emergency substitute or that she needed a sub, period, that all she'd have to do is call me and I would do the task.

Yesterday, was the first time I really was able to spend some time with her because she has been sick and we are both in school again. The only other real time that I get to see her is at the home football games and that is only at before the game starts and around 3rd quarter or 4th quarter, right before she goes home-- she only stays for the half-time shows. Yesterday, hte only real reason why I was able to see her was because she needed to borrow some vhs tapes for her classes to watch after their 9 weeks tests, to put her 9 weeks tests together, and to catch her up with grades. After we got all that done, we sat down together to help ME understand what I am doing in my Traditional Grammar class because I was lost-- as welll as help me prepare for my Informative speech in my Oral Communications class because I am doing it on FMS and since she has it and practically has every book, every website to get info from.... she is even letting me interview and record the interview and she is very shy... uh... uneasy about being on camera.

She adn I both wish that I could even see HER psychiatrist. Or, for me to go to an Internist.... She really thinks I am having pre-FMS symptoms and even RLS. She just knows and understands that I can't, but she is there to give me the support that I had so desperately needed since the beginning. If it wasn't for her, I wouldn't be here today!

AuSsie

behindtheseeyes00987
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2007
Total Posts : 191
   Posted 12/3/2007 10:04 PM (GMT -7)   
ive delt with it-its depression.

ShynSassy
Veteran Member


Date Joined Dec 2005
Total Posts : 3036
   Posted 12/4/2007 5:19 AM (GMT -7)   
Aussiegirl

I have found some info for you,please read this and get some help right away..



www.selfinjury.com/index.html


Shy
Mod- Depression

Chronic Depression, Panic Attacks,Anxiety Attacks,Anorexia
Meds I have taken throughout the years:Wellbutrin,Tranxene,Paxil,Prozac,Valium,
Lexapro,Zyban,Buspar,Clonazepam

Have been med free for 2 years now.

www.healingwell.com/donate

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