This is my 1st time....

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Melissa29067
New Member


Date Joined Sep 2004
Total Posts : 3
   Posted 9/28/2004 3:29 AM (GMT -7)   
This is my 1st time here.. i just recently joined about 10 mins ago... I have been dealing w/ depression for 8 long years... I am only 20 years old. I have 2 wonderful children.. They are the only reason the keeps me from driving myself insane sometimes... My marriage just recently fell apart... Ive been seperated now a little over a week.. but we have seperated and gotten back together mumerous times.. and i know that this is a contributing factor. Another thing is that my daughter is a little over a month old so I'm suspecting that maybe this has a little to do w/ the hormones. My depression was hereditary... And i pray everday that my kids have not inherited it. I have been told by my doc that i have manic depression. Also I have Atypical. I dont eat much any more.. and sometimes i just lose interest in almost everything.. I wonder if I will ever be happy.. if i will have a marriage that will last.. I'm beginning to lose all hope.. I grew up w/out my mom around.. I havent seen her in 17 yrs. My whole life has been one big messed up ride. I will answer anyones questions on anything that I have left out.. or if u r just curious to know anything... I desperately need a few good friends to help pull me out of this big dark whole that just seems to get deeper everyday. I appreciate any comments or tips. And I look forward to making a good friend or two if possible... Thanx... Melissa sad

Red09
Regular Member


Date Joined Dec 2003
Total Posts : 424
   Posted 9/28/2004 6:31 AM (GMT -7)   
Welcome Melissa, and sorry things are so hard for you. When you get afew mins, read the thread here in dep. called My story by Ralph. It's 3 pages long, but worth the read. Alot of good info there as well as some real inspiring words by some pretty amazing people! Feel free to jump in and join too. It's quite a little family happening in there...

You seem aware of what feelings of dep. you have. Talk to your doc about all this...Do yoga if you can, exercise, keep a daily journal...Just so you can get it out..makes you feel better. Ask your doc about seeing someone, a therapist maybe, cuz it seems with 2 children, the emotions of a new baby PPD etc as well as the stress of separation is too much to take, hense anxiety/depression...That therapist will help you deal with those emotions...Or even help with counsilling with your hubby if you guys want to work it out. Anyways, just some options for you to think about it...

I think that you being aware is so good!! Posting here, reaching out...I'm glad you're here, but sorry you feel how you are feeling.

Red09


Melissa29067
New Member


Date Joined Sep 2004
Total Posts : 3
   Posted 9/28/2004 9:29 PM (GMT -7)   
Thank you for the reply.. I am definitely going to ask my doc about what his advice would be and what would be my best choice... I really don't want to have to rely on medication to help me... I will if it is my only option... Me and my ex-husband are not going to be able to work things out... We are both to headstrong to meet in the middle and compromise... (this is not the 1st X we have seperated) I am going to read your story and see if I can pick up a few ideas. Thank you for the reply and I hope to hear from you again. -Melissa

Ralph
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2004
Total Posts : 139
   Posted 9/29/2004 7:30 AM (GMT -7)   
Melissa

You are 20 years old. You seem to have a mature attitude about life. Give your marriage a chance. Listen to Red and get some help. If you can, get your husband to read some of the contributions to this depression site. I'm sure there are things we have all been through that you can relate to. I've been around a long time and I know life has its ups and downs. This is just a down to be followed by some good times.

Most of your life is ahead of you. Try to bring others into it to offer advice and friendship. You have 2 children that will light up your life.

BellaBlue
New Member


Date Joined Sep 2004
Total Posts : 2
   Posted 9/29/2004 7:57 PM (GMT -7)   
Melissa,

I'm new here too. Here's to hoping for a better future.
And many new friends.


BellaBlue

JohnD
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2004
Total Posts : 472
   Posted 10/4/2004 2:51 AM (GMT -7)   
Melissa,

Welcome to the healingwell boards. I'm glad you found this place.
I'm very sorry to hear you've been going threw all this stuff for so much of you young life. life sure has a way of beating us up at the worst times..
I hope you stick around and get to know us as we get to know you. i found the chat room is a very good place to go in here, to find quick feed back.....when i went, the subjects were serious but light hearted......many of the folks in here are very much in the need of a understanding and friendly voice. I know i've had my monents.
anyways, i need to go(at work you know) you take care. JohnD

Mello
New Member


Date Joined Oct 2004
Total Posts : 14
   Posted 10/19/2004 7:25 AM (GMT -7)   

I had to post my first time here because it's my first time here, too, and because Melissa, you and I apparently share a great deal.  Right down to first names.  But also, there's so much in what you described that mimics my situation.  I'm ending a horrible relationship, and though that's a good thing, it's left me incredibly alone and lonely.  I'm considerably older, which is another problem, in that I'm not at prime dating age, and there is no way I can see for me to make new contacts or friends, let alone maybe meet someone I can feel love with again.  I'm about to move, also, which is a huge financial as well as emotional burden.  I'll be having to figure out how to re-create a life for my 10-year old son and myself, and yet juggle an insane work schedule. 

I spend most days feeling crushingly sad, fighting off tears, and just struggling to maintain composure.  I don't have the ability to set up any therapy sessions, though I know I need to.  My friends are all disappearing; misery does NOT love company, but drives people away.  I don't complain to anyone, or say anything as it seems nobody likes a whiner. 

I guess I'm hoping to find that this is a place where I can express feelings without being worried that my words will be taken wrong, or that I'll send more dear ones heading for the hills.

Thank-you for being here right now.


Ralph
Regular Member


Date Joined Aug 2004
Total Posts : 139
   Posted 10/20/2004 5:58 AM (GMT -7)   
You have come to the right place. Don't worry about finding love. You will. Just give it time. We here have all been through much depression and hard times. We all havae our stories, and we all like to help.

You are never too old to find love and you sound like a person with much to give to others.

Do you have depression or are you just going through a hard period in your life? There is a difference.

Ralph

Mello
New Member


Date Joined Oct 2004
Total Posts : 14
   Posted 10/20/2004 6:39 AM (GMT -7)   
In my case, it's not just life changes.  There in an underlying depression that goes beyond mood, but into the so-called vegetative symptoms of sleep and eating disturbance.  Unfortunately, there are too many things going on in life to magnify the problem to unreal proportions, and at a time when I need all of my defences.  Right now, each and every day is a terrible struggle.  I try to maintain hope that it will improve.  But I'm not sure right now.

sad+hurting
New Member


Date Joined Mar 2005
Total Posts : 1
   Posted 3/23/2005 10:41 PM (GMT -7)   
I am scared and I do not know what to do. I have two kids and I am a full time student. I have been married for 1 1/2 years. Just found out he cheated on me. Having trouble with my bills. I do not know how long I can keep my head above water.

Having2LeftFeet
Regular Member


Date Joined Feb 2005
Total Posts : 472
   Posted 3/24/2005 1:47 AM (GMT -7)   
smurf  Dear Melissa,
Glad that you joined this group but sorry you have so many problems at a tender age. Your life is just beginning and you have so many responsibilities with 2 young children. I had another critical person on another group tell me that depressed people "cannot pull themselves up from their bootstraps" which is so not true. They thing is that I had to crawl before I could walk just like a toddler. I enjoy giving support rather than getting it. I feel like I am doing something useful. Being kind to others is easy for me because most of my life I have been battling with depression and when you're depressed, lets face it. We are not on friends top 10 list. They don't want to hear the sad stories we have to tell.
 
You can come to this group any time you want to. All the members are super and DO NOT judge. They are kind and advise and support and are compassionate. If you need to vent, do so. We can take it. That's what we are here for. To help one another and to get help. God bless
H2LF 
There is no such word as can't. Can't simply means wouln't. Grab as much as life as you can. Future is a long way away for those who don't believe. Don't build a foundation of life on sand. It will take it away with the tide. Love a little more, be unkind a lot less.


Akram
Veteran Member


Date Joined Feb 2005
Total Posts : 616
   Posted 3/24/2005 7:07 AM (GMT -7)   
Welcome to the boards mellisa , you sound like a braver 20 year old , with a lot of responsibilaties. i know women much older than you who also have problems dealing with children, it's not an eazy thing to do . some women prefer just to have 1 child, but you have 2 to take care of.

Be strong, and have faith in god for he will take care of you , i don't know how you are doing financially i hope the best for you and your children, May god bless you..
                                                     To be or not to Be

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