Post Edited By Moderator (Raniah) : 7/18/2009 8:24:07 AM (GMT-6)
I will admit that I feel peacful just sitting in a church and in fact I love to visit churches when I am on vacation. I also love books with pictures of churches.
I am glad you found some peace in your church. Bless you to my friend and please no my email is open if you ever feel the need to talk.
I wish you peace and happiness,
Post Edited (stkitt) : 7/19/2009 5:22:05 PM (GMT-6)
I think that sometimes depression feels exactly like a devil- but in my honest opinion your suffering is a result of your depression and remember that depression takes on many forms and makes you feel like you are going mad- but you arent. Keep fighting and i will be praying for you-
Trust me on this one please, you are going to be OK. I know that feeling of lonliness and being stuck inside your head but you must break free.
May I suggest a few things that might help? Have a plan for those long evenings when you feel alone with your thoughts. I always keep books I want to read or silly movies that I know will make me laugh. Sometimes a chick flick that even makes me cry is good as the tears are different then the ones of frustration you feel with your depression.
Do you belong to a church group, do any volunteer work? I have a casual job during the school year working with children and they really keep me busy for the days I am with them. Anything available to you that you could volunteer to do?
When you are experiencing a great deal of pain and loss, your self esteem takes a very severe blow. Perhaps we can help you build up your self esteem and you will be able to ward off the depression better if you feel good about yourself.
Believing in yourself is the cornerstone to improving your self esteem. And you can do this by starting out small. List a few things that have made you proud about yourself or things that you have accomplished that you can honestly describe as a success. I know you have many and remember they do not have to be huge accomplishments.
Everyone has at least a few things that they can be proud of. Realize just how much better your life will be if you allow yourself the gift of having a high level of self esteem. Realize that your relationships will improve and that you can begin to achieve what you want if you really feel good about yourself.
We all believe in you and want you to get better so make that list and keep adding to it everytime you remember something you have accomplished in your life.
Start with writing down that you reached out to the members of this forum looking for help. That was a huge step and a great accomplishment. Gentle Hugs and Prayers,
Depression is the devil and has many faces. Please seek out another Dr. if you feel the one you are seeing now is not doing everything they can to help you. My depression was a very physical thing, days when my whole body ached, someone would ask me a question and I could not even focus enough to answer, I know how frustrating it can be. All you want is to feel better. Sounds like you are doing some positive things and that is good. Until I changed Dr's and even then got another opinion and finally got meds right, then I started feeling lot better and being able to handle life's stresses without completely melting down. Do not, I repeat, do not give up! You can and will find a way to feel better. Focus on taking good care of yourself and when your mind starts going in the wrong direction, tell it to take a hike and get busy doing something you really enjoy. Really, you may just need a med adjustment or different med all together.
Good luck and chat us up anytime. This is the greatest forum and the people here are awsome and really do know what you are going through. when I meditate tonight I have already promised Jamie some good vibes and I will send you some too! Believe in yourself and that you can beat this, because you can.
bella, in time you will be better. beating it, well i hope you do! me, it is about management. i too will send positive vibes your way, precious gem has given you excellent wisdom, try to use some of them when you can. as gem says, you can not give up, i too beleive in you, as i beleive in all. fight like heck, we all (here at hw) are in ya corner. prayers of peace and healings to you. jamie
Bella, Please don't give up. You have made the effort to reach out to the HW group. That is a very positive step. I don't know how long it has been since you lost your parents but there is no time limit on grief. You need to take the time to mourn their loss. Is there a grief support group you could attend? That might give you some perspective on handling your feelings. Also, as others have suggested I would try to fnd another dr. to see if someone can tell why you have the headaches. They sound like stress and tension headaches but there must be a temporary med you can take to stop them. Have you considered individual counseling? That might help. As far as your home is concerned don't sell it until you are ready. The fact that you have a dog is good as pets are truly a comfort and it sounds like your dog is good for you. Please, please know how much everyone here wants the best for you and for you to start to feel better. You mentioned you sat in a church. Is that your local parish where you attend services? Even if not you could go and ask to have a talk with the preacher. I find that preachers are very good at helping those in need and can be very comforting. Please keep posting, we are all here to help you and support you in your time of need. There is always somone who will respond to you. Do try to take good care of yourself.